Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone without them knowing it?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone without them knowing it?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone without them knowing it?

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone without t... - 5/17/2011 9:55:46 AM

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

Perhaps you are just "undressing them with your eyes" or having a conversation that is leading, but sexually charged for you - without them even knowing it. What about masturbating to the sound of his/her voice on the phone but never fessing up to it?

Do you believe you need to get consent from someone before you take sexual gratification on their behalf, even if they are totally unaware of it?

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 9:57:09 AM

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

Yeah...I personally contact Halle Berry every time I wack off.

next question?

_____________________________

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 10:07:42 AM

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

I suppose all of humanity is unethical, because we have all had sexual thoughts about others without them knowing it....

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 10:08:15 AM

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

Most of us, fantasize.

Should we confess to everyone we know if we have indulged in using them as a fantasy object?

I think it might depend on the nature of our relationship and even then I am not sure ... but masturbating while they are on the phone with us, I think is a different matter.

If a stranger did it and we could tell chances are we would feel violated (and obscene phone calls are illegal).

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 10:23:58 AM

Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline

Oh...hellll THAT never occured to me;

Dear VAA, Dear FukinTroll, can I obtain self gratification while looking at your photos? Please?

Well....now that I've taken care of that.......back to my photo album............

_____________________________

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't.

Za'beeta Regal, Et Vogo O' Lurwadra'd Wyka Go Abosh Inunsey.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 10:24:11 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

This is just the way that I'm wired.

I'm not much one for the 'undressing someone with the eyes' if it's just random dude on the street. It just doesn't do it for Me all that often. Never did.

I'm much more likely to have the sexually charged conversation with someone I know. I'm not exactly covert about it. Instead, it's rather evident.

Masturbating on the phone? On the rare occasions that I'm in that situation, yes, I tell them.

ETA - I forgot this part. Do I think it's unethical for that last one. Yes, I do.

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 5/17/2011 10:25:26 AM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to angelikaJ)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:28:35 AM

Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Perhaps you are just "undressing them with your eyes" or having a conversation that is leading, but sexually charged for you - without them even knowing it. What about masturbating to the sound of his/her voice on the phone but never fessing up to it?

Do you believe you need to get consent from someone before you take sexual gratification on their behalf, even if they are totally unaware of it?

i've certainly fantasized about real people without telling them. i'm not sure i would call that objectification, because i fantasized about them because i was attracted to them. When someone attracts me it's because of their personality, not because of their dick, or their sexy voice, or their pretty face, or whatever. Does using that fantasy as a way to get off qualify as objectification? Yeah, okay, it probably does.

i don't undress people with my eyes.
i don't have sexually charged conversations without the other person knowing. Wait, i take that back. In the past i have done that at work, when i had a crush on my boss or on a customer. i wasn't consciously trying to lead the conversation in a sexually charged direction, but when you're crushing on someone, everything you say seems sexually charged. So, i guess, yes, i've done that.
i've mastrubated to my fantasy of a real person, but i've never mastrubated to their voice without them knowing.

i have gotten sexual gratification from fantasizing about real people without their consent. i don't think that's unethical when the person is in my head instead of on the phone or in front of me. i don't mentally undress people, but if someone did it to me i think that part that would upset me is if it affected their behavior towards me in real life. Otherwise, it's just another fantasy. i don't mastrubate on the phone with people unless they have instructed me to, and the thought that someone would do that to me is upsetting, even if i had no clue what was going on. i have mastrubated to porn, but i suspect the actors know that people do that, and by making the porn at all, have implicitly given their consent.

i think that getting off on a fantasy is okay, but any real time sexual behavior requires the other person's consent. Crushes don't count, because you can't really help having them.

pam

< Message edited by gungadin09 -- 5/17/2011 11:33:23 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:37:53 AM

Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This is just the way that I'm wired.

I'm not much one for the 'undressing someone with the eyes' if it's just random dude on the street. It just doesn't do it for Me all that often. Never did.

I'm much more likely to have the sexually charged conversation with someone I know. I'm not exactly covert about it. Instead, it's rather evident.

Masturbating on the phone? On the rare occasions that I'm in that situation, yes, I tell them.

ETA - I forgot this part. Do I think it's unethical for that last one. Yes, I do.

If Im have hot n streamy phone SEX with someone....HellFuckingYea they are gonna hear about it...

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:39:09 AM

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

I am not into phone sex so that isn't an issue for me, but yes, I would find it unethical.

The rest..........pffffffttttttttt!!!!!!!! People do it all the time and so do I. It is human nature.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:40:33 AM

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

When I watch TV and put my feet up on em, they know something is going on...

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:42:18 AM

Posts: 8098
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Masturbating on the phone? On the rare occasions that I'm in that situation, yes, I tell them.
[/color]

The ones who might go off on my pictures on my pro side pay me to see them...so sort of they get my consent sort of...

even when of course I have no idea who they are

For me to go off on someone non-financially I usually need to know them more than just about their looks...and it did happen that we had indirect talks towards that direction but it never got to more unless I was interested in a serious Ltr

_____________________________

RIP 08-09-07

The PAST is history, the FUTURE a mystery, NOW is a gift - that's why it's called the PRESENT

www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:43:19 AM

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

I suspect I'd be a busy man if everyone who'd read one of my books and had a fantasy of what it would be like to be with the author called me. I'm busy enough with the ones who want me to play an active part.

< Message edited by JohnWarren -- 5/17/2011 11:44:28 AM >

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 11:43:33 AM

HannahLynHeather

Posts: 2950
Joined: 4/4/2011
From: where it's at
Status: offline

not even slightly unethical. what business is it of theirs what i frig myself to?

hannah lynn

_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:31:55 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

For myself, I don't find it remotely unethical.

I wouldn't care in reverse, either.

agirl

_____________________________

See how easy it can be?

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:36:50 PM

Posts: 3457
Joined: 5/9/2007
Status: offline

In my mind...none of you ladies are safe!...

_____________________________

If you have sex with a siamese twin, is it considered a threesome?

The trouble with ignorance is that it picks up confidence as it goes along.
- Arnold H. Glasow

It may be your sole purpose in life to simply serve as a warning to others!

(in reply to agirl)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:39:18 PM

Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline

I can't imagine the sexual harassment issues at work this would cause if everyone were telling each other they thought they were hot lol.

Wanking to their voice on the phone (um, not at work) is pushing the envelope a bit as to what's ethical behavior in my world. But if every man who undressed me with his eyes TOLD me he was doing that I'd be a little creeped out I think. This is probably a case where "Don't ask don't tell" is a good thing.

< Message edited by NuevaVida -- 5/17/2011 12:40:49 PM >

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

(in reply to HannahLynHeather)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:40:16 PM

Posts: 14614
Joined: 8/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Perhaps you are just "undressing them with your eyes" or having a conversation that is leading, but sexually charged for you - without them even knowing it. What about masturbating to the sound of his/her voice on the phone but never fessing up to it?

Do you believe you need to get consent from someone before you take sexual gratification on their behalf, even if they are totally unaware of it?

Akasha

What in the hell are you talking about?

Are you suggesting that it is improper to be sexually aroused by another person unless you get their consent?

So if I find a hot woman at the bar I need to ask her permission for my dick to get hard?

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:41:40 PM

Posts: 477
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Perhaps you are just "undressing them with your eyes" or having a conversation that is leading, but sexually charged for you - without them even knowing it. What about masturbating to the sound of his/her voice on the phone but never fessing up to it?

Do you believe you need to get consent from someone before you take sexual gratification on their behalf, even if they are totally unaware of it?

Akasha

I don't have a problem with any of the things you mentioned. After all, they don't affect (let alone harm) the "objectified" person in any way.

But if you're thinking about the ethics of getting aroused without the consent or even knowledge of the person who stimulated your arousal, a fairly obvious question arises. How do you feel about people who get turned on by reading your stories, and the other content you post on your website? What if they're thinking about (or beating off to) not just the fiction itself, but the thought of the woman behind the stories and what an awesomely kinky mind she must have?

I do have a stake in the answer to this question, since your writing had exactly this effect on me when I was barely legal and just discovering possibilities. If you find that type of reaction objectionable, then I guess I owe you an apology.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:42:45 PM

hlen5

Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Perhaps you are just "undressing them with your eyes" or having a conversation that is leading, but sexually charged for you - without them even knowing it. What about masturbating to the sound of his/her voice on the phone but never fessing up to it?

Do you believe you need to get consent from someone before you take sexual gratification on their behalf, even if they are totally unaware of it?

Akasha

I used to answer a crisis /helpline. Many mentally challenged and/or lonely men who couldn't get a partner would call and try to whack off with the phone call. They would try to talk about their favorite little scenarios. All the other volunteers found as offensive as I did. The callers knew it wasn't allowed and continually tried anyway.

The phone calls were anonymous and we did not have caller ID. The next phone call might be a true suicidal person, so it wasn't like you couldn't pick it up.

Totally unethical (and so would be indulging them and letting them get away with it.).

_____________________________

My fave Thread: http://www.collarchat.com/m_2626198/mpage_1/tm.htm

One time "Phallus Expert Extraordinaire"

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone witho... - 5/17/2011 12:43:48 PM

Posts: 6660
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline

God! I hope it is not unethical because I sexualy objectify nearly every woman I see! Some of the woman here on CM might be shocked to know what they have done with me... in my mind.

_____________________________

Do you know what the most awesome thing about being an Atheist is? You're not required to hate anybody!

(in reply to AAkasha)

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Is it unethical to sexually objectify someone without them knowing it?

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.324