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Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:25:57 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		my dangly bits - we all have gotten the emails with genital shots, the whole "delete" thing works best, but sometimes they are sending shots where you think "You're showing that off? I mean you have a legitimate reason to get penis extension..." or "Crickey, that looks diseased, ewwww..." or "You do know they manufacture razors, the Brazilian rainforest is beautiful but unless you have the lung of the planet in your pants, TRIM or SHAVE..."

I was joking around with a few friends what would be good answers if we'd be inclined to answer...

- Will it be a real dick when it grows up?

- Oohhhh, wow, lovely er...shape!

- Or....I do really admire the beautiful blue veins!

Any other comments for some light comical relief?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html
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RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:28:32 AM   
hlen5


Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline 		So, I guess you're right handed..........?

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One time "Phallus Expert Extraordinaire"

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
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RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:29:58 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		For the more 'chunky' guys - "wow, it's true that nothing grows in the shade!"

or "it's like a penis, only smaller"

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to hlen5)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:36:33 AM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		Such a lovely shade of purple...is that natural?

I love what you've done with creative photography...it DOES look much bigger when it's next to a soda can!

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:36:39 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		*Mental note - must not take a sip of anything while reading replies.... Oh well, the screen needed cleaning anyway

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:41:48 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		"next time send me a dick shot, not a face pic!

Oh...you did...my bad"

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to LadyConstanze)
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RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:43:27 AM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		My favorite comes from the popular 90s club song "Short Dick Man": 
 
"Aww look, isn't that cute?  A second belly button."

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Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 11:00:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I know the little guy is your best friend and all, but not everybody is as excited to see him as you are.




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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 11:15:14 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline 		Thanks for reminding me why I'm a lesbian.

If I wasn't a lesbian before, I am now.

Go back and read the story one more time, the boy puts his finger in the hole in the dyke.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 1:13:54 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		Heather, I'm surprised you haven't gotten pics of dangly and very hairy bits, usually the guys who send the pics don't read profiles and if they do, they are possibly sure that a glimpse of their usually quite unimpressive appendage is enough to convert every lesbian. Bless their faulty eyesight!

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 6:50:57 PM   
LdyBlaze


Posts: 1
Joined: 2/24/2007
Status: offline 		I actually like saying.. "My clit is bigger than that.."

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 6:57:45 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		That was quite inventive, to photograph it through a magnifying glass.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 8:05:27 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		My current favorite ...

"Wow, the last time I saw one that size, I was changing my nephew's diaper"

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Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 9:04:45 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

Heather, I'm surprised you haven't gotten pics of dangly and very hairy bits, usually the guys who send the pics don't read profiles and if they do, they are possibly sure that a glimpse of their usually quite unimpressive appendage is enough to convert every lesbian. Bless their faulty eyesight!
I am too. Even I used to get them, from bi or gay men of course. I used to send them back a shot of some stupidly well hung porn star with the comment (stolen from Crocodile Dundee and slightly modified for the purpose): Penis? That's not a penis! This is a penis!

It didn't work as well as I'd hoped, because they usually assumed that the youthful fit hard body in the picture was some how connected to me and would write back professing eternal devotion to my magnificent cock.

In the end I just switched my settings from bi to straight, since I wasn't really looking for a male sub anyway.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:44:15 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Heather, I'm surprised you haven't gotten pics of dangly and very hairy bits, usually the guys who send the pics don't read profiles and if they do, they are possibly sure that a glimpse of their usually quite unimpressive appendage is enough to convert every lesbian. Bless their faulty eyesight!
Actually I've only received 2 pieces of unsolicited mail, from the same person, both sort of silly, but polite. I'm a little disappointed actually, I was expecting the flood of bizzaro emails that I've heard about, but nothing. I guess I'm just not sexy enough for the trolls.

Maybe I need to put up a picture of a jacket with some boobs in it eh?

Or I should capitalize on it. Hey! That gives me an idea for a silly thread.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Look at... - 5/28/2011 10:50:50 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Betting your name is Rosey Palm!

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I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Look at... - 5/29/2011 1:42:13 AM   
SexyBossyBBW


Posts: 1693
Joined: 2/25/2010
Status: offline 		LOLOL
quote:

Betting your name is Rosey Palm!


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"..touching was and still is and always will be the True Revolution" Nikki Giovanni
"Only when there are many people who are pools of peace, silence, understanding, will war disappear." -Osho

(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Look at... - 5/29/2011 2:09:28 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		is that a dollop of smegma, or are you just pleased to see me?



I'm sorry...particularly if you are eating roundabout now...

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to SexyBossyBBW)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Look at... - 5/29/2011 3:05:15 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		OMG, I am soooo grateful that I am not eating or drinking anything... Didn't feel like cleaning the screen AGAIN, lol, some superb come backs...

Reminds me, as a student I shared a flat with a very feminine looking gent (also very gay and great fun), he had a rather high pitched voice and often people assumed we were just 2 girls out and tried to pull. For a while we got an obscene caller, now one day S answered the phone and the caller groaned "Guess <pant pant> what am I doing right <pant pant> right now? I got my <groan pant> huge cock in my hand..." S just replied "Sorry ducky, as long as you still have a hand free to hold the phone, I'm simply not interested...



_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Look at... - 5/29/2011 8:20:54 AM   
SthrnCom4t


Posts: 343
Joined: 9/9/2007
Status: offline 		Lady C, thanks for sharing 'the splatter screen'!!!


quote:


Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

OMG, I am soooo grateful that I am not eating or drinking anything... Didn't feel like cleaning the screen AGAIN, lol, some superb come backs...

Reminds me, as a student I shared a flat with a very feminine looking gent (also very gay and great fun), he had a rather high pitched voice and often people assumed we were just 2 girls out and tried to pull. For a while we got an obscene caller, now one day S answered the phone and the caller groaned "Guess <pant pant> what am I doing right <pant pant> right now? I got my <groan pant> huge cock in my hand..." S just replied "Sorry ducky, as long as you still have a hand free to hold the phone, I'm simply not interested...




_____________________________

Sthrn
Honorably served by OttersSwim

'The sign of a developed mind is one in which two opposing ideas can coexist' - Oscar Wilde.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 20
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