ardmore64 -> RE: Why does everyone ask this? (7/29/2012 5:07:01 PM)
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The terms dom, sub, and switch are just labels. They are used for convenience. It's easier to say "I'm a switch" then to spend time explaining the nature of my sexuality, who and when I will I will be dominant submissive. There isn't a points system where if you score over 30 you are a dom, between 15 and 29 you are a switch and under 15 you are a dom. The reality is that there is a continuum form completely submissive to completely dominant along which everyone moves to one extent or another. That doesn't mean that a true dom will ever want to submit, but that they may be more or less dominant based on a number of factors, such as their health on a particular day, how tired they are, how much stress they are under etc. In some cases the variations may be very small in overs they may be bigger. The most obvious example perhaps, is seen in male subs who are often at their least submissive when they just cum. The difference between a switch and a dom or sub is the amount of movement on that continuum. There seems to be a degree (to some extent warranted) of paranoia when people ask about how much a switch is a dom and a sub, but think there are 2 main reasons why people ask. Firstly, it is asked because someone doesn't fully understand the variety of things being a switch can mean. For someone who tops men but is submissive to women for example, numbers and percentages are irrelevant; the role is dependant on the partner. People often see it to simplistically, assuming it is just based on a degree of dominance and submission, ignoring other more important aspects. Secondly, I think people are trying to understand the dynamic to see how that person fits within the dynamic of their own role. the question is asked just as a part of getting to know someone and finding out if they may be compatible. In the end we are who we are. There are some people we will conect with and some we won't. It's as simple as that.
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