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RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:48:59 AM

tammystarm

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thinking i will start making a list of each and everything i do everyday and posting it on the refrigerator.... think theyd get the hint! nope doubt it. by the way in between postings i feed the dogs and cats, put away the clean dishes and put in the dirty dishes, swept the floor, cleaned my tub....and a few other things... yet i do nothing.

(stop your bitching CANT im furious!)

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Post #: 421

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:49:39 AM

frazzle

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So do as everyone has sugested, put your foot down. Remove for more than a day all their electronics, stop running them to field trips, sports, the park or whereever else unless school related. Pocket money is a thing of the past.

Hell if it was me, theyd find they didnt have meals or clean clothes, but im a bitch.

< Message edited by frazzle -- 7/8/2011 9:51:43 AM >

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Post #: 422

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:50:06 AM

CalifChick

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Your children can do the dishes, stop being a martyr.

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Post #: 423

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:50:58 AM

tammystarm

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if only there was a like button like facebooks! thanks agreed only didnt go back to bed, because it was a reward for the hard work the kids did in cleaning up the fairgrounds from the fireworks, and she was expected to be there. STILL wish i had went to bed though

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Post #: 424

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:52:16 AM

tammystarm

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so they can run to their leader and say i had to do the dishes i had to clean this and i had to clean that...... running away and smoking pot SOUNDS DIVINE!

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Post #: 425

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:52:23 AM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

stop being a martyr.

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Post #: 426

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:52:36 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Just go to bed, Tammy.

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Post #: 427

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:54:57 AM

tammystarm

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am i wrong but dont you have to be dead to be a martyr? maybe im thinking of something else. and i really am not trying to get the poor pity me act, that is bullshit, i can stand on my own two feet..... just wishing i had somebody who thinks omg let me help you, freaking occassionally!

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RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:55:38 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

meanwhile making everyone coffee.

quote:

Hey i agree..... i did end up smacking her, slightly. And i did have a talk with those again! they are now a united front against me, freaking lovely. and yes, should be getting off my ass and working more on the house.... they dare say i didnt do anything yesterday! i got up made coffee for them took her to her meeting, came home did the dishes (unload and reload dishwasher) cleaned cabinets and door facings, wash laundry (admittedly yet to be folded) and cleaned the bathroom.

Ok, WHO are you making coffee for, your 10 and 13 year olds or Art's grown daughter and BF? Aren't yours too young and his too old?

And since you HAVE a dishwasher, why is dirty dishes in the sink overnight ever an issue? The 10 and 13 year old are both old enough to load and unload it. They empty it before dinner prep, it gets filled and run after dinner, and emptied again in the AM. I really don't understand why this is so complicated...

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Post #: 429

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:56:58 AM

tammystarm

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exactly it shouldnt be so freaking complicated but some freaking how it is! and its my fault. that and about a billion other things....

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RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:57:57 AM

LaTigresse

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It isn't but some people prefer to be a victim of their life.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Post #: 431

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:58:06 AM

tammystarm

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ok now im sounding pathetic ill shut up now. i think ill buy a punching bag this evening.

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Post #: 432

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 9:59:36 AM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: tammystarm

exactly it shouldnt be so freaking complicated but some freaking how it is! and its my fault. that and about a billion other things....

Tammy............seriously..........do you REALLY not see how disgustingly pathetic your posts like the above really are????

I don't believe you are a stupid woman but your apparent inability to see what everyone but you (and arty) see.......just leaves me flabbergasted. Seriously!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to tammystarm)

Post #: 433

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:00:03 AM

zephyroftheNorth

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quote:

ORIGINAL: frazzle

So do as everyone has sugested, put your foot down. Remove for more than a day all their electronics, stop running them to field trips, sports, the park or whereever else unless school related. Pocket money is a thing of the past.

Hell if it was me, theyd find they didnt have meals or clean clothes, but im a bitch.

THIS! Either get tough with them and put your foot down or shut the fuck up. Also, Artie needs to man up and start helping out, at least with the discipline if not work around the house.

Personally I think this is all more Tammy and Artie drama lama stuff, especially since his daughter and her boyfriend aren't even HOME though you whine about them being so lazy.

Frazz sweetie, you may be a bitch, but you're an awesome bitch

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Post #: 434

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:00:54 AM

LadyHibiscus

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Codependency! That's the word I was looking for!

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Post #: 435

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:01:10 AM

zephyroftheNorth

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~ loves teh LaT!

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Post #: 436

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:02:32 AM

kalikshama

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Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

am i wrong but dont you have to be dead to be a martyr? maybe im thinking of something else. and i really am not trying to get the poor pity me act, that is bullshit, i can stand on my own two feet..... just wishing i had somebody who thinks omg let me help you, freaking occassionally!

You are thinking of the classical definition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martyr

A martyr is somebody who suffers persecution and death for refusing to renounce a belief or cause, usually religious.

Other posters are using it this way:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martyr_complex

In psychology, a person who has a martyr complex, sometimes associated with the term victim complex, desires the feeling of being a martyr for his/her own sake, seeking out suffering or persecution because it feeds a psychological need.

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Post #: 437

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:03:42 AM

frazzle

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Thanks zeph, had enough issues with my son and other half at one point, i went on strike, cancelled everything including sex with my partner. Strange the attitudes to helping out changed rather rapidly.

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Post #: 438

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:05:31 AM

barelynangel

Posts: 6233
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Who the fuck is their "LEADER?"

Christ Tammy, from what i understand there is you, Art, and your two kids and maybe one of Art's in the home. Who gives a fuck what they tell their "leader."

Tammy, you need to learn the word "no." You're gonna write a LIST of what you do? Are you kidding me?

STOP DOING EVERYTHING and ANYTHING FOR THEM. You tell them exactly that. You are no longer their taxi, their bank, their maid, their support, their cook, etc etc etc. If they ask you something, simply say no. Everytime they want something, no. You don't cook for them, clean for them or take them places that are not "required" i.e., school -- if they start missing things they enjoy because they can't get there -- they may start appreciating how much you taxi them around. When they have no money, they may start appreciating the fact that you give them a hell of a lot, when they have to eat their own cooking and have to clean dishes to do so, they may start appreciating what you do around the house they think just MAGICALLY gets done etc.

angel

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Post #: 439

RE: Fibro, school, house of 6 - 7/8/2011 10:06:27 AM

sunshinemiss

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quote:

ORIGINAL: tammystarm

am i wrong but dont you have to be dead to be a martyr? maybe im thinking of something else. and i really am not trying to get the poor pity me act, that is bullshit, i can stand on my own two feet..... just wishing i had somebody who thinks omg let me help you, freaking occassionally!

Mene, Mene, Tekel, Upharsin

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Post #: 440

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