Who Moves

Who Moves (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

MHOO314 -> Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:39:01 AM)
This is inspired by profiles not threads---but it hit Me--why in the world would a Dominant post relocation on their profile? I always assumed any submissive would move to Me---that just gives Me an odd feeling about the stability of the Dominant---I am so open for opinions on this one.

slaverosebeauty -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:44:01 AM)
I would move to be with my partner, but I do know of tops who have moved, because their bottom had a good job and it would be hard for them to leave for whatever reason. I don't think its a question of station, but a question of being realistic. If a bottom has a house and a great job adn kids or along those lines and their top doesn't, its gonna be easier for the top to move. Station doesn't have anything to do with who moves.

fastlane -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:46:09 AM)
I have two years left before the babies are out of the house. I have told potentials that should they decide to move here, it is a temporary haven, as I have the strongest of urges to move west. Having said that, let's say I meet someone a year from now who already lives somewhere out west, why shouldn't I be willing to relocate? I think there are exceptions to any rules MH and the situation usually Dick tates[:D] what rules apply. Kevin

gentlethistle -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:46:40 AM)
Perhaps some dominants have careers that are easily relocated and they like a change of scenery? Perhaps some submissives have children settled in a school or they're in jobs that it will be hard to find in another area or they have other responsibilities/studies/interests that their prospective dominants will insist they continue to honour rather than dropping and running.... Perhaps...the world is full of an infinite variety of considerations and tastes and there's really no accounting for any of them... Laura

bandit25 -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:47:28 AM)
I agree with slaverosebeauty. But I'd like to add that I have kids...17 and 14. It would be very hard for me to uproot them...take them away from their schools and their friends. So if the dom I was interested in wasn't local, he'd prolly have to be the one who moved. Like slaverose said, I have a very good job, and I own an apartment building. I, too, don't think it's about station...it's about practicality...at least for me.

fastlane -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:50:11 AM)
I got some new moves I'd like to try out on MH [:D]

LaTigresse -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:50:41 AM)
I would have no problem whatsoever moving as long as I could be sure that certain things I require would be available to me. A way to earn a decent income, a place to live that I could have my furry babies and room for my family to visit, an enviroment that I would be happy and comfortable in. I will not forfeit my financial present and future but I am flexible.

slaverosebeauty -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:54:01 AM)
I have a small child, under age 6; so it's not as hard as if my munchkin was older. My ex is not in the picture so it's not an issue. Like my mother said, 'just live within an hour's drive from an airport, that's all I ask.' Not gonna be a problem. My child and my mother are very very close, but we have things arranged [talked about] so she and my munchkin can still see each other as often as possible. I can find work anywhere, so I'm not worried, if my partner has a good job, then it's just as easy for he 2 of us to move to him.

Najakcharmer -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:54:32 AM)
Deciding how relocation will happen based on practical real life issues strikes me as being a hell of a lot more practical than basing that kind of decision on who the dominant is in the relationship. Two people who decide to live together still gotta eat and pay bills, and it doesn't make a lot of sense for the submissive partner to be the one to dump their job if it happens to be the higher paying one, or to sell their house if the property market is currently depressed in their area. Depending on the amount of power exchange being agreed to, ultimately it may be the dominant's decision. But I don't think it would necessarily be a good decision, or an automatic one, to decree that the sub is the one who has to relocate if it's more practical and economic to do it the other way around.

RavenMuse -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:55:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 This is inspired by profiles not threads---but it hit Me--why in the world would a Dominant post relocation on their profile? I always assumed any submissive would move to Me---that just gives Me an odd feeling about the stability of the Dominant---I am so open for opinions on this one. I most situations I would agree, however in situations like mine, it is likely it would make the greatest logic for me to be the one who moves. I don't have any real ties in this area other than the fact I like it here (Which for now is enough that I am not willing to move) BUT if I found the perfect girl who happened to be at the other side of the country then it is very likely she would have ties where she is, family, job, etc. then I would certainly consider it. My blood family I haven't spoken to for many years, my friends are scattered all over the country and we travel to see each other already anyhow and I have no work commitments. No real ties apart from comfort. Lack of commitments to an area doesn't equate automaticaly to a lack of stability.

Bearlee -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 11:58:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaverosebeauty I would move to be with my partner, but I do know of tops who have moved, because their bottom had a good job and it would be hard for them to leave for whatever reason. I don't think its a question of station, but a question of being realistic. If a bottom has a house and a great job adn kids or along those lines and their top doesn't, its gonna be easier for the top to move. Station doesn't have anything to do with who moves. I too would move...but within the state where I live. I have no interest in moving further. I have a fun little home in a lovely little town...very rural, lotsa trees, etc. I'd want to try to keep it. It would make a great summer home! Still...I always just figured I'd be the one moving (I'm submissive)...I'm looking for a peer (older guy, good job (or retired) own home)) who is Dominant. I guess I just assumed 'his' place would be better. LOL That's what I like about these forums...it's a place to reconsider stuff... Thank you! I'd sort of thought like the OP did; a dom willing to move might not be as stable. Obviously I'm not thinking every angle. I'd like to add to the mix though...how many would change locations, but not TO the other's home, but instead just to the town; for the ability of spending more time together? Would you move to an appartment/home alone or would you want to move INTO the other's home...should you be willing to move at all? (or is that hijacking? sorry...)

thetammyjo -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:02:07 PM)
Ideally and philosophical if moving is necessary I'd prefer that the submissive slave moves. But in real life it is more a matter of who has the more flexible life. I have a husband, I have a slave, I have school and we own our house. Anyone joining us will be joining us in terms of moving to us.

LadyMorgynn -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:05:50 PM)
I work at home on the computer as a medical transcriptionist. Theoretically at least, I can work from any place in the entire world, so long as I have high-speed Internet. I do require that My slave work and bring in half the household budget as well as his own medical insurance. Theoretically again, therefore, and realizing that men with a strong, stable career may not find it easy (if possible at all) to relocate, I could go to him. This is not, however, my first choice. And I would very much dislike moving into his home, as it would tilt the balance of power in his favor. He must fit into MY environment, rather than vice versa. Also, there are a lot of places that I absolutely refuse to live (like the Deep South, for instance, or anywhere there is a known danger of tornadoes or hurricanes), and of course I couldn't afford to move overseas because of the cats, ferrets, books, computers... well, you get the drift... and I'll be damned if I leave behind My life for any man! So unless he's independently wealthy and will pay for my belongings to be shipped overseas, we can figure that I'll be staying in the Contiguous 48 :) So... although theoretically I could easily relocate, whether I would or not, would depend upon the individual, the situation, his location, and lots and LOTS of negotiating. In short, it's not very likely that it'd happen. But not impossible.

MHOO314 -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:16:47 PM)
hmmm last thread I saw had You tied over a stool, You get free from that yet? I was just getting out the lube...[8D]

RavenMuse -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:22:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 hmmm last thread I saw had You tied over a stool, You get free from that yet? I was just getting out the lube...[8D] Lube? sheesh, you are spoiling the boy![;)]

Bearlee -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:25:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse Lube? sheesh, you are spoiling the boy![;)] ROFLMBO

Sab -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:26:10 PM)
I am moving on a permanant basis - and I am a Dom, I am moving quite a long distance, but I won't go into personal details - but it certainly doesn't make me less of a Dominant.

GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:26:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 This is inspired by profiles not threads---but it hit Me--why in the world would a Dominant post relocation on their profile? I always assumed any submissive would move to Me---that just gives Me an odd feeling about the stability of the Dominant---I am so open for opinions on this one. I have to admit that I have been struck with the same feeling as MH. Although it should be a matter of practicality, I am, personally, averse to moving. I have been offered homes with various boys, if I would just relocate to them. There is something about the fact that I am moving to their home turf that bothers Me. I am sure it is not a conscious thing on the part of the submissive, but there is a home court advantage to be considered. And if I am not moving into their home, then I can see little reason to uproot Myself, in the first place. Since I plan to be in charge, I don't want to start a relationship living under his roof. Hope this is making some sense. I have noticed the profiles, here and there, that say "Willing to Relocate", and, in many instances, the tone of the profile itself does indicate an instability, and a willingness to just pick up in order to take advantage of a better lifestyle or search for security under the guise of being Dominant. There are always exceptions, of course, and I can usually see that in the way the profile is written. Which leads Me to another question. Hoping I am not hijacking, but I think this might go to the same sort of topic. I receive mail quite often from boys who tell me that they are now seeking a new Domina because they are uncollared for "X" amount of time, after a previous live-in situation. When I ask why they are no longer in their relationship, the stock answer is "She got transferred to another state and I couldn't go". I am meaning here, that they chose not to go. Not that they were released because the Dominant could not take them along. Yet, here I am, living (let's say) 7 states away, and they are contacting Me. I would think that if I did decide to relocate along the way, and a boy had been with Me for a reasonable amount of time, it would be automatic that he is coming along too. Again, there might always be exceptions, but I seem to get an awful lot of this stock reply, and it does make Me wonder, and I have a tendency to shy away from pursuing the possibility. Relocation is hard for either side. And I often find that most boys, who say they are ready to pack up and move, haven't really thought out the logistics of it. *Edited for the usual typos caused by dyslexic fingers.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:30:42 PM)
For me it's all about practicality. Finances, family, future circumstances and where ultimately we want to go. If I'm footloose and fancy free, can do work anywhere, and my partner has a sick mother to attend to and a contract job very specific to a location...well I think it's just better to move where my partner is. So to me it's really just a matter of where it's right to move and absolutely nothing to do with who is dom or sub.

LaTigresse -> RE: Who Moves (5/16/2006 12:35:36 PM)
Then again I suppose it all depends on the person. Moving for me would not happen until I had some definate real life things in place. Ex: job, home, etc. I do own property here in Iowa, would not plan on selling it or dividing it with the other owner. For me, willing to move is based on knowing there is a serious relationship I am moving for, not just for play. Also, I guess I actually enjoy new challenges, new scenery........I am just not a rut kind of person. I like experiencing and exploring new things, places and people. The idea of a move for me does not mean giving someone else a home court advantage or getting into someone elses territory. Just means I would be moving/expanding my court and territory. But then I did just get called "Our Fearless Leader" by a bunch of guys a few minutes ago............

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875