RE: Biases on collarme? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity

[Poll]

Biases on collarme?


Posters tend to be more sympathetic to women
  24% (24)
Posters tend to be more sympathetic to men
  0% (0)
Posters tend to be more sympathetic to subs/bottoms
  9% (9)
Posters tend to be more sympathetic to Dominants/Masters
  8% (8)
Posters tend to be more sympathetic to slaves
  3% (3)
There tends to be an anti D/s bias here.
  3% (3)
There tends to be an anti M/s bias here.
  7% (7)
Posters tend to take women more seriously.
  9% (9)
Posters tend to take men more seriously.
  2% (2)
Other
  34% (34)


Total Votes : 99
(last vote on : 10/8/2012 7:10:16 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )


Message


gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 4:30:36 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness
Basically, if you're a Male Dom and actually have a spine, you're a target. 

i agree. It seems like male Doms who say, look I'M the Dominant and she's going to do what I say or face the consequences- usually get RIPPED APART for saying it, and even more so if they're a new poster. There are certain regular posters who can pull it off (Kana comes to mind), but in general the forum seems hostile to males Dominants who take a hard line towards their female subs. So often, they just get categorized as abusive, and the guy gets called all sorts of names.

...Don't believe me, pick a pages-long thread and watch how many of the women in it:
* Respond to a contrary opinion by reinforcing and supporting each other.
* Attempt to attack a guy by talking ABOUT him to other women,  rather than addressing him directly.
* Descend to random insults whenever they see a poster they don't like.

i agree that women do that more often then men, but i mostly attribute that to the fact that there are more women posting. Even if You're right and it's a gender thing, i'm not sure whether it should be called a "bias" rather than simply, a difference in the way men and women communicate. What makes it a bias?

I think the most damning aspect of all this is the general flavour of intolerance which comes from this FemDom established board hierarchy. 

i've never noticed. Can You be more specific? Intolerance of what?

Oh, and I'll agree with the newcomer thing.  Newbies get jumped unless they're hot. 

i agree.


Thanks for responding, Awareness.

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 4:40:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zonie63
However, a newbie coming to the site for the first time may not realize this at first... They might be expecting good old fashioned arm-around-the-shoulder sympathy for their plight (whatever it may be).


i think that's at least PART of the perceived hostility towards newcomers. The fact that many of them come in expecting hugs and kisses and cotton candy- and then it's NOT like that, and they feel personally attacked, instead of realizing that the whole place is just like that. That was part of my problem when i first came here. i had very unrealistic expectations for what an internet forum was like.

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 4:43:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulAlloy
I suppose there's an anti-wank thread bias though :p


Maybe, but i actually think posters are overly anxious to classify threads as wank material.

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 4:58:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968
I've been around here since 2005. It really hasn't changed much...The only thing I think is different is that there weren't as many wanker threads back then and actual topics got discussed and were the longer threads... The threads that are worthy of a real discussion barely make it past page one these days.


Out of curiosity, why do you think things changed?

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 5:30:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SuzeQ
There's a very strong anti-sex bias on CM.
Those who are sexually motivated in their BDSM are regularly belittled as "just a bottom".
Any attempt to actually discuss sex or relate things of a sexual nature are shouted down very quickly.



You could be right. For example, i read part of the thread LadyHibiscus objected to in post #100. i thought the OP had a valid question, and was dealt with harshly.

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:10:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NocturnalStalker
The only time people are being honest here is when they throw out insults on someone's personal character.  It shows they dislike them to a great degree and certainly beats the pussyfooting a lot often do.


Insults like that have been sparse on this thread. Would you say that the responses to this thread have been honest, or not?

Earlier i asked, whether there was a bias against honesty, or a bias against individual posters. You said if you answered you would get the thread pulled. But a number of other people did answer, saying both yes and no. Why do you think other people can get away with saying what you can't? Is that evidence of a bias against you, or merely that your methods are ineffective?

pam




tazzygirl -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:23:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

I'm curious whether forum members think there are any of the following trends here. (multiple selection allowed)

pam




I've been around here since 2005. It really hasn't changed much. Just the names. People have been jumping all over other peoples words for as long as I can remember on this site.
The only thing I think is different is that there weren't as many wanker threads back then and actual topics got discussed and were the longer threads.
Now I know when I see that there's a thread that goes on and on for pages that it's just a trainwreck.
The threads that are worthy of a real discussion barely make it past page one these days.



Now what you see is... "did you use the search engine???" That bothers me. Who says a topic cant be revisited every once in a while?




tazzygirl -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:31:58 PM)

Im glad you agreed with Awareness, pam. I was starting to think I was the only one.




kalikshama -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:39:58 PM)

quote:

You could be right. For example, i read part of the thread LadyHibiscus objected to in post #100. i thought the OP had a valid question, and was dealt with harshly.

pam


When the perception was that he wanted to masturbate in public, he was dealt with harshly, but after he clarified that he didn't mean the general public, he got helpful answers, including one from me.





kalikshama -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:55:05 PM)

quote:

Cheating.  Men don't get the same free pass that women seem to.  Watch the introduction forum sometime.  There are definitely cases of women who sign on here to get a piece of the side who get 'welcomed' but a man doing the same doesn't get the same reaction.  Personally, My feeling is, wherever a person stands on the cheating issue, it shouldn't matter which gender is involved.  Yet, I often see the 'let it slide' attitude depending on if a person is male or female.


I'll give a cheater of either gender a hard time but I have far more opportunities with men.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
I don't see a favoritism toward female posters, but then I mostly see females posting!


quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09
i do, and i think it has to do with the fact that there are more females posting.


I see a bias against new One True Way or I Am Entitled to a Delivery of my Kink NOW posters, and these are predominantly from men.

Someone mentioned people arriving from AFF - if the climate is very different there, that might explain some of the newbie posts we get. I'd hate to blame it all on Male Privilege. Or http://submissivewomensecrets.com/

/wishes for 30 seconds with Google Analytics/




MadAxeman -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 6:57:31 PM)

I'm not sure I understand the premise of this thread. What is meant by 'bias'?
Unless it's given away by their avatar or handle, I am not always aware of an individual's gender, or orientation.
I rarely view profiles, but go through them if I message someone over something raised on the boards. I try not to make a habit of leaping to assumptions, but have been mildly surprised to find some people are of the opposite gender or kink than might have been thought based on their posts.
Without mentioning names, I see subs who stand up for themselves, gays with right wing agendas, grounded Goreans and D-types who I wouldn't trust to put a plug on a toaster or order a burger and fries.
To me, that just means people are failing to behave as two dimensional stereotypes.
There are exceptions, that's how stereotypes are created. You know who you are.
I'm a male D-type and I don't get shredded for it. But then, I don't have gender, kink or supremacy issues. If I want to make a point, I make a point. I don't say 'I'm D-type and male, therefore right' that shit might float in a personal dynamic, but is a fairly certain method for getting shot to bits on public fora.
Maybe I just haven't been paying enough attention, which is very straight male and D of me. Typical.
Put titties and beer on it and I'll notice.




Aileen1968 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 7:01:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968
I've been around here since 2005. It really hasn't changed much...The only thing I think is different is that there weren't as many wanker threads back then and actual topics got discussed and were the longer threads... The threads that are worthy of a real discussion barely make it past page one these days.


Out of curiosity, why do you think things changed?

pam


I think the biggest difference is the amount of people. Back then you almost "knew" everyone that posted. It was a good day if there were 100 regulars on at any one time with maybe 1000 guest viewing. And the regulars were people that actually lived this in the flesh for the most part. There were very few cyber relationships. Their posts were written from experience and not from fantasy.
I just looked...460 members with 47,000 guest viewing.




Awareness -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 7:05:52 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

Personally, I find posting wank-fodder for the chicks kind of demeaning. It's an appeal for popularity. If a chick wants to know what's in my head, she needs to invest some time and effort. Nevertheless, some dudes do it and it always makes me roll my eyes.



Awareness, just by posting what it is you just posted, you have posted wank-fodder for some. There's no telling what turns some women on, you know.
  Firstly, those women are weird.  Second, send them to my inbox - we clearly have things to discuss.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness
Edit:  Oh, forgot this one.  If you want to see the female need to belong in action - check how many female signatures have nonsensical addendums which state they belong to this or that miscellaneous group, they're "approved" by some individual or they have this many points.


I think that's a small group.

To which, ahem, I haven't been invited. But it's okay. I'm not bitter.

  You get your invite when you've demonstrated your fitness to be a member of the screaming harpie brigade.  Practice by humiliating male subs for a while, then when you get bold, try taking on a Dom.  Start with a fluffy one first, they don't bite as hard.




MadAxeman -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 7:12:33 PM)

I'll put my teeth in.




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/13/2011 7:31:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl
Now what you see is... "did you use the search engine???" That bothers me. Who says a topic cant be revisited every once in a while?


That one puzzles me too.

pam




gungadin09 -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/14/2011 12:11:53 AM)

Upon reflection, i think the biggest bias around here is the one for conformity and against anybody who's different for any reason. And i admit, i'm just as guilty of that as anybody else. It makes me sad, and ashamed.

pam




LillyBoPeep -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/14/2011 3:43:21 AM)

^^ I think that's a fair way to break it down. Different models to conform to, but at the end of the stay, it's still conformity. -- whatever the "wave" is, you're expected to ride it.

I've done it, too, for various reasons. Trying to stop doing it now.




LaTigresse -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/14/2011 7:17:16 AM)

As much as I really hate to admit it............in many ways I agree with Awareness.

I am 100% certain there will come a time when I will regret writing that.[:D]

To explain myself more however..... Recently I was reading something on here and was rather surprised to see the ass kissing a s-male was giving a few women that self identify as dominant. Women that I had long ago written off as brain dead twits, that only they themselves, thought they had anything of value to say. They are part of the crew that I just tend to skip right on over their posts. The only reason I read them this particular time was because the guy, that I do read, was actually writing in reply to them. I was like "Jesus Fucking Christ what the hell is he thinking???"

But what it really does seem to come down to is that women, in all things in life, really do seem to be given more leeway in what we spew out our mouths/fingers. It's like, okay, even if we type really stupid shit, guys will lap it up regardless. Especially if the women are giving those guys any attention at all. The flip side of that is that, if we don't seem to type a correct amount of stupid fluff to balance our more thoughtful/serious/harsh stuff.......we are considered rude bitches......regardless of the intelligence of the posts. Especially if we use a style/language that the masses don't feel is acceptably ladylike and demure.

Now, if a woman is reasonably attractive, does not post controversially, and is even close to being available, the guys tend to make utter fools of themselves. Regardless of dominant or submissive. The flip side of that, is that the few decent looking, reasonably intelligent men that appear to have a job and no obvious weaknesses (drugs, drinking, mental issues) that don't come in here and make utter fools of themselves......will get the women fawning over them. However...MOST of those men, regardless of dominant or submissive, will tend to pander to those women, basking in their attentions.

So while I agree with a lot of Awareness's assessments it really only underlines my own long held view........regardless of brains, brawn, looks.....the pussy rules. As a general rule.




Hillwilliam -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/14/2011 7:19:08 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

So while I agree with a lot of Awareness's assessments it really only underlines my own long held view........regardless of brains, brawn, looks.....the pussy rules. As a general rule.


Pussy only rules the pussies. [8D]




LaTigresse -> RE: Biases on collarme? (11/14/2011 7:22:50 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam


quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

So while I agree with a lot of Awareness's assessments it really only underlines my own long held view........regardless of brains, brawn, looks.....the pussy rules. As a general rule.


Pussy only rules the pussies. [8D]


I actually agree with that. But then again I am either a bitch or an asshole......depending upon which pussy you ask.




Page: <<   < prev  8 9 [10] 11 12   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875