Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (Full Version)

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UrbanSpider -> Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/19/2012 5:56:28 AM)

Im looking for some constructive criticism.  more words, less words, different pics, more pics, I'm getting burnt out, and need a boost, Please help



Fornica -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/19/2012 6:05:33 AM)

A boost how?
Profile-wise?



UrbanSpider -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/19/2012 6:16:17 AM)

Yes, profile wise.



meisterhau -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/20/2012 8:44:34 PM)

First off-realize that the male:female ratio on this site (at least according to my recent search for my area) is 5:1.  You have to set yourself apart from a *lot* of competition.

If you're a switch, your primary target audience is going to be women that are mostly submissive.  If you're lucky, you'll find someone who is either curious about switching, or is willing to learn in order to please you, then warm up to the idea later.  You are *not* going to find someone who is mostly dominant who is going to want to submit to you unless you can impress her with your self-confidence.

Here's my first impression reading your profile: You don't seem 100% confident about yourself.  You could use a better head line than, "Hi, my name is Kevin".

Self confidence comes from doing what you set out to do.  You start by keeping promises to yourself.  When you know that you can do what you set out to do, that comes across. (And you've got a good srart with your education).  Women are not going to want to submit to someone unless they know they are worthy to submit to.

The biggest ego boost any man can get is getting in shape.  Trust me, the women will be all sorts of interested.  It's worth putting in three months of working out 6 days a week and watching what you eat for three months.





DarkSteven -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 2:11:49 AM)

Hi, Kevin.  I'm under the impression that Baltimore has an active kink scene.  Have you been going to local events?



crazyml -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 4:15:40 AM)

Hello there OP,

I'd say a little more - about you, your ideal match, and the kind of relationship you want together.

And, I'd suggest you revisit the grammar on your text - you're not a "Dominate switch", you're a "Dominant switch".

Good luck!



UrbanSpider -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 5:46:36 PM)

thanks  been out to the local scene ..... very very limited.

suggestions for opening comment ..... i hate this part ...... even in college.



Baroana -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 6:21:28 PM)

Your profile seems fine. However, you don't talk about anything relationship or d/s oriented. I suggest describing the ideal lady you envision and the sort of relationship you think you would like to have.

When you say you aren't getting results, I wonder if you are messaging people or if you are waiting for them to message you. It is essential that you message a lady if her profile interests you. If you are doing that and not getting responses, then maybe something is wrong with your messages.



Fornica -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 6:22:28 PM)

Grammar and spelling count. What sets you apart from the other men on here? If you can't answer that, we certainly can't for you. You know?

Edited because I suck.



WebWanderer -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 6:24:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

Grammer and spelling count.

You misspelled "grammar"... [8|] [;)]



Fornica -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 6:48:29 PM)

omfg! I've bitched so many people out for that. I'm going to go die now.



WebWanderer -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/21/2012 7:55:42 PM)

Can i have your stuff? [:D]

And just so this post doesn't get deleted as OT - i'm with Baroana on this one: your profile reads like something from match.com - in other words, it's just a mini-biography that appears to be designed mostly for vanilla readers... Write more about what you're looking for in terms of BDSM, how much experience you have in it, what your perfect session would be like, etc...



Fornica -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/22/2012 6:09:49 AM)

No. No you may not.
Well, maybe a couple things.
quote:

ORIGINAL: WebWanderer

Can i have your stuff? [:D]






sheisreeds -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/22/2012 8:05:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: UrbanSpider

thanks  been out to the local scene ..... very very limited.

suggestions for opening comment ..... i hate this part ...... even in college.


Where the hell are you going? I'm in Baltimore and the TNG happy hour usually has 60+ people. The DC TNG party sold out this weekend. There's usually about 2 play parties a week.

Message me if you need to figure out where to go.

Also, there is a new party circuit for all the pet players! Dozens and dozens of pet players, led by a man and his bunny.

Baltimore itself only has one official play venue (though sometimes we take over the swinger club), but if you got friends there's tons of private gatherings. Also, a lot of us just trek out to the DC spaces, and there are at least 2 and a half (the half represents the Crucible which is currently remodeling).

On the profile I'd talk a little be more about what you are into from a BDSM standpoint.

Also, a lot of the Baltimore folks are not on collarme, since there are so many places to meet people in person. We all use Fetlife extensively as that is the best way to keep track of EVERYTHING going on.

Between Dark Odyssey, Black Rose, DC and Baltimore TNG, Big Bad Nasty, DXS Rapture, Fetfest, Sacred Marks Sanctuary and BESS the DC Baltimore region has more kinky shit going on than anyone could possibly go to.

Hell Baltimore even has it's own kinky crazy pagan festival space. With cabins, a dining hall, and everything. There's usually 3 to 4 major all weekend festivals with 200-1000 people at that venue every summer.



UrbanSpider -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/22/2012 10:46:09 AM)

ok  tweaked a few things and wrote a little more .....  anymore ideas ???? 



crazyml -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/22/2012 6:24:32 PM)

Looks better, man!

The capitalisation of "my" to "My" isn't to my taste, but fair enough.

(ppsst... I noticed an "its" instead of an "it's" and a "whats" instead of a "what's")



DBWhiskey -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/23/2012 7:16:40 PM)

Photo adjustment. Atmosphere and tone are a big deal with photos, take one and edit it up, make it look awesome, THINK HARVEY KEITEL IN BAD LIEUTENENT!! ATMOSPHERE! Also add a few pictures of stuff that you find interesting or beautiful: ladies like to see you have a sense of aesthetics and that things mean something to you.



UrbanSpider -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/24/2012 8:50:57 AM)

pics changed around added some others

next ???



DBWhiskey -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/24/2012 3:00:31 PM)

1) HUMOR
2) ODDNESS
3) GET OUT THERE

Humor, everyone is funny somehow, some much more than others. EVERYBODY LIKES PEOPLE WHO ARE FUNNY, think of all the people you've known who maybe weren't all that great but were just funny as shit, and how much you liked being around them because of it. Showcase your sense of humor, at least a bit. As Ricardo, the union painter who trained me back in the day (who was an absolute MONSTER with the ladies) would often say, "Make her giggle Bubba, give her a little tickle and make her giggle." That fucking guy knew what he was about: a little tickle in your profile, a little giggle for the reader, and you are suddenly 1000% more interesting.

Oddness, people who are not aware of their own oddities, and who do not appreciate a little oddness in others, are spiritual slobs and not worth your time. Go ahead and fly your freak flag a little bit, a little puzzling oddness, BAM 300% more interesting.

Get Out There. There was a time when duck hunting was a professional pursuit in Europe. They had this gun, the name of which I do not recall, which was effectively a cannon-sized shotgun. They would mount these things to boats and sneak up on the ducks, and BLAST, 50 ducks dead, CASH MONEY!!! There is a type of person for everyone, but a lot of people are not going to be your type of person, they just won't get you. The best way to get those people who get you to come around is to just shotgun-cannon everyone, get out there, be seen, be yourself where other people can see. People will take notice, they will take a look at you, and every 10th or 20th person will be like, yeah, this guy is the balls, I like this guy, and message you.



UrbanSpider -> RE: Is there something I'm missing or doing wrong ?? (1/25/2012 11:42:12 AM)

revised  check it out 



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