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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/2/2012 11:19:34 PM   
KnightFromPA


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Calling yourself a Master doesn't mean that you get to go back on your agreements by OsideGirl -- 2/26/2012 11:20:10 AM

Is in total Agreement

A Master / Slave relationship has to be built and maintained on trust and Honesty.


(in reply to Kana)
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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 12:54:49 AM   
Endivius


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jessymarieh

I think we need to sit down and talk about what we want.




Thus, endeth an entirely pointless debate. Right and wrong are a matter of perspective.

Have your talk, and make your decision together.



_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 2:06:28 AM   
JeffBC


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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightFromPA
Calling yourself a Master doesn't mean that you get to go back on your agreements by OsideGirl -- 2/26/2012 11:20:10 AM
Is in total Agreement
A Master / Slave relationship has to be built and maintained on trust and Honesty.

Kind of. but it's also worth noting that over the long haul, things change.

God knows that when Carol married me she wasn't expecting to become property. She surely wasn't expecting to have to deal with an awful lot of the changes I've made in her and continue to make. Our marriage has evolved. Since I've always been the [significantly] dominant partner it has, not surprisingly, evolved in ways which are suitable to me. How much "choice" she had in all of that is an interesting question but given our two personalities she had less than half the influence for certain.

I guess the bottom line for Carol is that she's happy. But this business about static agreements seems to me as likely to work as 100% honesty.


_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to KnightFromPA)
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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 5:02:11 AM   
kalikshama


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quote:

So I am going to continue to post from my perspective

You're not coming across as posting from your perspective, you're coming across as My Way is the One True Way - that was the source of the objections.

And now this:

quote:

I am the first to admit that I have a lot to learn yet before I take on a slave

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 124
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 5:43:14 AM   
Firebirdseeking


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Yup, its your attitude, LoreBook, its how you come across. But hey, if you wish to come across with arrogance and attitude, that is your choice. I notice you made a boatload of assumptions about me, and my marriage as well. I dont think I sent you a copy of the rules book on my marriage and D/s relationship. But hey, if you wish to make assumptions, go ahead.

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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 8:09:28 AM   
LoreBook


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quote:

You're not coming across as posting from your perspective, you're coming across as My Way is the One True Way - that was the source of the objections.
Now that's a little ironic of you to say, don't you think? Especially since as I have been the object of a good number of Your Way is the Wrong Way posts, by the people doing the objecting. Anyway, you see, I don't care one way or another how I come across to you or anybody really, I'm have enough BFFs and I'm not looking for more.

And Firebirdseeking, I didn't make any assumptions about you or your marriage, I didn't give it any thought whatsoever. I didn't even know you were involved with anyone, and I don't care if you are. I don't know a thing about you and I don't really care to. Based on the attitude you've displayed and the opinions you've expressed on this thread, when it comes to how a D/s relationship should be structured and managed, you and your opinions don't matter to me, I think you're wrong so I have no interest in your marriage or your rule book in this context. Maybe in some other context or on another question your experience and opinions might be of interest, but not in this case.

I know that people engage in relationships other than 24/7 face-to-face TPE M/s relationships but I don't care. That they do it and how they do it is mostly irrelevant to me, I don't consider those relationships D/s relationships.



_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 126
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 11:55:29 AM   
MsLadySue


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Why respond to an OP's post seeking advice when all you can do is repeat 'your one true way' for the structure and management of a D/s or M/s relationship? She was asking for advice about her situation.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 127
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 12:23:23 PM   
Firebirdseeking


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All I hear from you is "I dont care, you dont matter, I am right, my thoughts are the only ones that matter, my way is the only way that matters. Everyone else including me can go f themselves".

That is what I hear.

So: congratulations, you get the rudeness award if not on the board, certainly on this thread; and good luck having a relationship with anyone but yourself with that attitude. Have a good life.

(in reply to LoreBook)
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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 1:01:13 PM   
LoreBook


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Why respond to my posts when all you can do is repeat "your true way"? I responded to the OP once, based on what was in the OP, and then to the bizarre responses of others. If you don't like my advice to the OP, that's fine, but I have to wonder why you continue to repeat the same thing to me over and over, I've already told you I know that and I don't care. But I guess if it makes you feel better about yourself to preach your fluffy brand of dominance to me I don't mind. Its actually kind of amusing.


_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

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Profile   Post #: 129
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 1:02:58 PM   
LoreBook


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You're hearing things, you should get that checked out.

_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 1:41:35 PM   
MsLadySue


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Thanks LB for your words of wisdom (sic) about my "fluffy brand of dominance". You continue to substantiate my low opinion of you. No need to tell me you don't care, because that's already a given. Just saying.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 131
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 1:44:28 PM   
IrishMist


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quote:

I'm betting he's highly insecure. He wants you to be model thin so all his friends envy him.
He wants you to get a tattoo as 'proof' or your devotion.
He doesn't want you to earn more than him.

That's pretty much my read of the situation.

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 1:47:22 PM   
Firebirdseeking


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She really knows how to make friends and influence people here, doesnt she?

(in reply to MsLadySue)
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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 3:33:12 PM   
MsLadySue


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She would tell you she doesn't care if she makes friends or enemies. She's way too special to associate with us.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to Firebirdseeking)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 3:40:31 PM   
LoreBook


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My aren't we the catty little things? Meeeeow! hiss spit hiss.

You two are almost cute the way you get all butthurt when somebody doesn't suck up to you. Almost, but not quite.



_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

(in reply to MsLadySue)
Profile   Post #: 135
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 3:47:14 PM   
MsLadySue


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Resorting to insults is such a tired, unimaginative, predictably douchy thing to do. Run along now and find someone who might be impressed by your posturing, swaggering, and chest-beating. You bore me.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 136
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 3:57:37 PM   
slaveluci


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From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

Clearly her expectations of a D/s relationship are different than yours. While littlewonder may give unquestioning obedience, I certainly do not, nor would M make those demands of me.
Master would actually be upset if I didn't use my head and question things that upset me or I thought was detrimental to the relationship. He respects and utilizes my ability to present linear logic.

Just wanted to say that I totally agree with you ladies. It's not, as littlewonder sums it up, all split up into those who will do anything for their dom and those who won't. That's really, really oversimplified. But she does admit it hurts to think I love Master and will do what pleases Him. That does not involve turning off my thinking processes. As a matter of fact, He would think that would make me a stupid cunt and probably pretty much of no use whatsoever. If it hurts to think and make decisions, I'd be a pretty sorry slave, wife, employee, etc. "Unquestioning" is simply not something either of us admire in another person. But it takes all types and that's just A-OK with me. I just hate when others assume if it ain't done their way, it just ain't right

luci

< Message edited by slaveluci -- 3/3/2012 3:58:59 PM >


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(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 4:05:48 PM   
LoreBook


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quote:

Resorting to insults is such a tired, unimaginative, predictably douchy thing to do.
I know, right?

quote:

She is all of 22, and I guess, like most 22 year olds, she thinks she knows it all.

quote:

Firebird, please dont blame it on her age, im 23 and have learned a lot, and i doubt its simply the extra year...

I think it might have to do a bit more with lacking in tact then it is age...

quote:

A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose. Hopefully in the next few years, this 22 year old will lose hers. Else she's going to have a hell of a lot of difficulty getting, and moreover, keeping a partner.

quote:

So: congratulations, you get the rudeness award if not on the board, certainly on this thread; and good luck having a relationship with anyone but yourself with that attitude.

quote:

You continue to substantiate my low opinion of you.


quote:

She really knows how to make friends and influence people here, doesnt she?

quote:

She's way too special to associate with us.

quote:

Run along now and find someone who might be impressed by your posturing, swaggering, and chest-beating. You bore me.


Physician, heal thyself. Just saying.


_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

(in reply to MsLadySue)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 5:21:10 PM   
VideoAdminGamma


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Fast reply

A reminder to take a breath and address the substance of the subject, not each other.

Thank you for your contributions to the forums,
VideoAdminGamma

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"The administration has the authority to handle situations in whatever manner they feel to be in the best interests of the forum, at that moment, in response to that event. "

http://www.collarchat.com/m_72/tm.htm

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: He wants me to change....? - 3/3/2012 5:31:12 PM   
littlewonder


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yeah, I admit it hurts to think. I have to think all day long, I have to make decisions all day long and most times he requires it of me but he also knows it tires me and I want a break from it so he has no problem picking up that slack for me.

I like that I don't have to worry about what I have to do day in and day out, that I don't have to make as many choices as I would if I was in a "normal" relationship or was still single. It's soooo much easier to me. It means way much less stress in my life. I've had enough stress in my past life for 10 people to even handle so these days it's a welcome and grateful thing in my life to not have all that anymore.

Plus we're both easygoing people and his decisions most times are pretty easy to go along with...I did say MOST times. There are times when it's extremely difficult for me to swallow what he wants but I do it, I even break down sometimes but I still do it because I consented to be his slave and I don't go back on my word with him. It's an integrity thing.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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