How far would you be willing to go... (Full Version)

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gungadin09 -> How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 3:20:32 AM)

... to change your body, if your Dominant wanted it? For the purposes of this argument, lets ignore any money or health concerns. Would it matter very much if the person's ideal body image were quite different from your own? Would you lose, or gain, 40 pounds if they wanted it? Dye your hair? Shave your hair? Plastic surgery? For dominants, have you ever required your sub to change their body image?

Pam



Alecta -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 3:22:07 AM)

I'm curious to see if and how the outcome of this thread compares with average vanilla women's willingness to do the same as well :)



gungadin09 -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 3:23:24 AM)

I should have made it a poll.

Pam



gungadin09 -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 3:25:10 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta

I'm curious to see if and how the outcome of this thread compares with average vanilla women's willingness to do the same as well :)


How willing do you think the average vanilla woman (or man) is?

Pam



Alecta -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 3:38:20 AM)

Hm. I think for the average Vanilla woman it's based on the tipping point between how much of her personal identity what she's being asked to change is and how keen she is to keep the particular person asking happy. On average maybe 40 to 60% at a guess?



Focus50 -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 5:25:25 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

For dominants, have you ever required your sub to change their body image?


Let's see, things I've made my subs do over the years re body image....

Keep within a specified weight range, including making one lose nearly 10kgs.

Grow hair at least longer than shoulder length.

Grow that other hair because I really loathe that pre-pubescent look on grown women that's so damned annoyingly popular in this age. Then keep it trimmed to a neat landing strip.

Get rid of body piercings. Ear rings only, thankyou.

Assuming she's got any, absolutely, positively NEVER think I'll ever be ok with another tattoo - no matter how tiny or subtle or sooooo cute blah blah.

I've never required my sub to do anything invasive like brandings or boob jobs etc.

Focus.



Focus50 -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 5:32:19 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta

I'm curious to see if and how the outcome of this thread compares with average vanilla women's willingness to do the same as well :)


That's interesting....

I've twice had middle-aged subs say to me that I should accept them for how they are. And yeah, I think that is reasonable, IF we're embarking on a vanilla relationship. Again, it's not like the things I expect are invasive or irreversable if we don't work out.

Focus.



sexyred1 -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 6:40:41 AM)

If someone needs or expects me to change in any way, shape or form something that I do not already want to change, then he should not be with me.

If, however, someone who is already with me, requests something reasonable, I might do it.

But cut my hair, shave my head, get plastic surgery, etc. no way in hell. If it doesn't like it like this, he can find someone to mold. I am already a grown up.



GreedyTop -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 7:11:51 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

If someone needs or expects me to change in any way, shape or form something that I do not already want to change, then he should not be with me.

If, however, someone who is already with me, requests something reasonable, I might do it.

But cut my hair, shave my head, get plastic surgery, etc. no way in hell. If it doesn't like it like this, he can find someone to mold. I am already a grown up.



This.

*sends smooches to the gorgeous sexyredilicious*



pyschosubmission -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 7:17:44 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

... to change your body, if your Dominant wanted it?



Up to Gender reassignment surgery [;)]

[:D][:D][:D]



kalikshama -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 7:24:50 AM)

I don't think one can ignore health concerns when it comes to gaining or losing 40 #.

I've shaved off all my pubic hair a few times but detest the pre-pubescent look on me and wouldn't do it again.

I've always been willing to get a tattoo if there was something I felt strongly enough to get a tattoo and so far this hasn't happened. The impetus for a tat would have to come from me, not him.

Ditto for weight loss - I lost weight under a Dom's influence and when the relationship foundered, gained it all back and more as a way to take back control. I am losing it again, but the desire needs to come from within.

I have chemical sensitivities so dying my hair would have to take into account health concerns as well. If there was a dye I could use, I'd consider a color that I liked too.

So my answer is that body mods would need to be a joint decision.



littlewonder -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 10:37:47 AM)

whatever he wanted. I don't cut my hair because he wants long hair, I shave all areas because that's what he wants, I'm losing weight for both of us. If he wanted me to gain, I would. If he wanted me to shave my head, I would.

He already has plans for changing my body with piercings, and holes and such. I trust him so I don't have any problems with doing whatever he wants me to do.



OsideGirl -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 10:51:10 AM)

My hair is the length and color that he prefers. I no longer have colored contacts since he prefers my brown eyes.

As for my weight, I have a hereditary syndrome that determines my weight for me and unfortunately, mother nature outranks him.



AthenaSurrenders -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 11:11:30 AM)

-fast reply-

Hmmmm... this is a tough one

I'd like to say 'anything' but as you know I've had some real body issues lately so to be realistic, if he wanted me to gain 40lbs I'd have a hard time with that. Or lose 40lbs since I'd fear more saggy skin. Though it is hard to ignore health consequences with that one.

Hair, shaving, no problem. I'm not a fan of tattoos but would make the sacrifice for him since I'm confident we're forever and I know he's not such an idiot he'd want my forehead tattooed so that I couldn't get a job. Cosmetic surgery - probably. Because although I don't want surgery, I think I would enjoy the results, assuming it wasn't something bizarre he wanted done.

But all those things I would only do for my current husband, not some hypothetic dom, and only because he has consistently shown unwavering love not dependent on my appearance, and regard for my welfare and best interests. If that was a requirement at the beginning of the relationship I'd have passed him by.



noellesdestiny -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 11:23:36 AM)

I may agree to some but not all.



Titaniya -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 11:53:52 AM)

In my vanilla relationships, I'm willing to do very specific temporary things if a significant other asks. Mostly, I'd be willing to let certain hair grow or dye my hair a color they preferred. I wouldn't get a tattoo for them or mess with my weight, but I've asked their opinions on planned tattoos to take them into account before getting the tattoo in question.

As a dominant, I wouldn't require my submissive to make any changes that aren't easily reversed, but if (healthy) weight loss/gain was something they wanted for themselves, I'd certainly be open to integrating it.



kalikshama -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 12:35:10 PM)

quote:

But all those things I would only do for my current husband, not some hypothetic dom, and only because he has consistently shown unwavering love not dependent on my appearance, and regard for my welfare and best interests. If that was a requirement at the beginning of the relationship I'd have passed him by.


Good point. There's lots of things I've only done with my (now ex) husband. We'd been married 10 years before we ventured into BDSM.



Alecta -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 12:41:57 PM)

Athena, Kalikshama, do you ladies think you would have done similar for them if you weren't Dom/sub (but everything else in the relationship being the same)?



kalikshama -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 12:49:08 PM)

Well, in my case it had nothing to do with submission but mostly about trust, and also being open minded, curious, and wanting to make my partner happy.



ServosCor -> RE: How far would you be willing to go... (9/25/2012 12:53:50 PM)


How far would I be willing to go to please Another?

Hmmm the weight gain/loss (unless done for health reasons) is not something to play around with, dying my hair: sure, I would hope they didnt go for the "goth" look; I rather love my highlights :),

plastic surgery??? My first reaction was oh hell no. then, I realized there are things I would love to change if I could afford it so that would be a maybe, depending on what surgery they suggested and what the health risks were.

Shave my head: I think that one is a firm NO. Shave the rest: sure, not a problem. Tattoo's? I love them but it would have to be a special tattoo that meant something to both of us. I dont need any cartoon characters or spur of the moment tats at this stage of my life. :)



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