Collarchat.com

Join Our Community
Collarchat.com

Home  Login  Search 

RE: Swapping submissives for a few days?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? Page: <<   < prev  5 6 7 [8] 9   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/22/2013 8:18:39 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
No, my custom made kangaroo signals are quite a bit more costly than your victorias secret shit, honey.  If you figure that the whip makes the man, that is.  But they all run the same dollar and a half cracker, don't they, sport? Nothing you can afford.  And  your foolishness has been here for everyone to see, and so I don't think you are going to glean alot of ooohs and ahhhs and people listening to your asswipe out here, even third graders know better.

< Message edited by mnottertail -- 2/22/2013 8:20:16 AM >


_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 141
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/22/2013 8:41:37 AM   
lior4


Posts: 13
Joined: 1/28/2013
Status: offline


eight pages already....

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 142
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/22/2013 9:54:17 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas


quote:

Yes, I am rational. I live in the real world, not the fantasy that you an Tammy live in (until the next public airing of all your problems).


I live in a real world of 24/7 and that is not all Roses and there are some Thorns indeed but we enjoy it together, thank you very much for asking.


Until the next major blow up. Roses and thorns by the way are NOT proper nouns. No need to capitalize them.

quote:


quote:

You proclaim to be a dominant, yet you also recognize you have absolutely no control over your submissive and to top it off, you have this bizarre need to feed your OCD by planning elaborate scenes.

You suggest we do away with the safe word and one is not a Dom if he allows safewords. You also suggest Doms who put together scenes have a bizarre need.


Care to point out where I said do away with safewords? And no, I don't suggest that doms who put together scenes have a bizarre need. I was very clear that YOU have bizarre needs.

quote:


quote:

This is a young girl who is being led down the rosy path by someone who is clueless (do you feel a kinship with him?). What most of us have done is to attempt to keep her from doing something she will regret when the frenzy is over, or when she finds herself posted on every amateur porn site there is, which ever comes first.


You are such a nice person for looking out for this "young girl". I don't remember her asking you and she is not a young girl, she is an adult.


She's eighteen. That makes her a young girl.

quote:


quote:

You seem to be replying under the delusion that the OP only wanted the point of view of dominants. Well, I'm a switch, so that makes me qualified to answer, even though I still believe you are deluded.

Actually, she did not want anyone's opinion. She instead asked male Doms if they were interested in swapping. Are you in the right thread?




So your view is that if she came on saying that her dominant wanted to cut off her leg because he had a prosthesis fetish, and she asked if "other doms" had this experience, no one but "qualify doms" should answer? Again, as a switch, I'm also a dominant. Regardless of that, the majority of people on the boards, when they see someone who is very much a newbie asking about doing something very stupid, and engaging in something where she is likely to be hurt, we tend to want to let them know. People shouldn't advise her that all of what she is doing can end up on amateur porn sites without her knowledge or consent, or that she is delving deep into a situation where she will never be a primary concern for her partner, and that she is quite likely wasting her youth on some idiot on the other side of the country, when she could easily attend events locally and be involved with a real, live person.

I realize that is not your way of doing things, but the beautiful thing about these boards is that there is more than enough evidence that you engage in questionable behavior on a regular basis and indeed could probably benefit from some sessions with a good therapist.

(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 143
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/22/2013 4:30:57 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas

So, you have cock and you grab some hair and use her. Wow.


What's wrong with that??? Hell, Master does that to me and I'm in Heaven.



_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 144
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/24/2013 3:39:24 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

No, my custom made kangaroo signals are quite a bit more costly than your victorias secret shit, honey.  If you figure that the whip makes the man, that is.  But they all run the same dollar and a half cracker, don't they, sport? Nothing you can afford.  And  your foolishness has been here for everyone to see, and so I don't think you are going to glean alot of ooohs and ahhhs and people listening to your asswipe out here, even third graders know better.


Why do you say I believe simply having whips made by Wian Studios http://wian-studios.com/leather.html makes me a Dom? They are fine whips and ordering them was a good move but I never said simply spending money makes one a Dom. Instead, I spent a great deal of time developing my skills before I ever used them on a sub and I first developed them by practicing on right size and shape targets drawn on feather pillows, this before ever using them on a live subject (although I am pleased to say I had volunteers who offered to be learning targets, brave ladies they are). Even after such practice I had much to learn that only life subjects could teach me in how they reacted and those Doms out there will know what I mean.

BTW, the practice procedure I outlined above is found in "The Loving Dominant" by John Warren.
Also, your pathetic personal and grownless insults are much like warm shit you thow at the wall hoping it sticks, but you end up having to step in it to leave.

Finally, I think an even better question is why you feel rubbing leaves on your hands and posting endlessly on the forum makes you a Dom? Do you feel the more you post the better Dom you are or do you feel new people to the forum buy into your postings, and even if they do, is that a Mark of a Dom?

< Message edited by Arturas -- 2/24/2013 3:44:38 PM >


_____________________________

"We master Our world."

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 145
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/24/2013 3:43:24 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder


quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas

So, you have cock and you grab some hair and use her. Wow.


What's wrong with that??? Hell, Master does that to me and I'm in Heaven.




Nothing wrong with that. Tam loves me to grab her handle also.

_____________________________

"We master Our world."

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/24/2013 3:43:45 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
So Arturas, is domination about whips and ropes to you? Or something more? Just curious since it seems most of your posts revolve around sexplay as domination.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/24/2013 3:46:45 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

So Arturas, is domination about whips and ropes to you? Or something more? Just curious since it seems most of your posts revolve around sexplay as domination.



So, littlewonder, no, they are tools of the trade but are useless with out the desire, the confidence and the skills.

_____________________________

"We master Our world."

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 148
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/24/2013 3:48:58 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
You still didn't answer my question though.

Let's say you could no longer use a single toy. You could no longer give her pleasure or pain or even orgasms or sex. Would you still be interested in domination?

Hopefully I was clearer.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 6:51:45 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Artieboy,

I happen to be very good friends with Looie.   You read his book, so have I.   Your pathetic insults are beneath contempt, but that is neither here nor there. 

Now where did you get the idea that I am claiming that I am a Dom?

Your masterful skills don't seem to extend to the area of keeping your wide and brawling womans (or your) mouth shut. Maybe pick a book up on that.

  

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 150
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 9:36:21 AM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AmbitiousLauren
Thank you for taking your time to read this. My Dom is looking to swap me with you sub as a learning experience. It will only be 3-7 days. Please message me if you are interested. I will give you my yahoo to chat.

Obviously this thread didn't go as you had hoped. Allow me to explain why. Most of the posters on the discussion forum side are in (or are seeking) real life relationships -- that is to say -- we can smell our partner. So a bit of cyber-swapping isn't really going to be very interesting to us. In addition there's a problem of risk imbalance. If your dom loans you to me he risks nothing... or near nothing. If I loan Carol to him... even cyber-only... I risk both the collar and wedding ring on an almost 20 year long relationship. In point of fact I would call two things a near certainty were I to do so:

a) Carol would not find your dom "dominant" and would not obey.
b) Her disobedience would cause me to release her... a fact she'd probably be fine with at that juncture.

I think you'd do better to ask this question in a more cyber-only venue like SecondLife. There, such things would happen much more readily because the audience would be in the same general framework as you. Good luck in your search.


_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to AmbitiousLauren)
Profile   Post #: 151
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 9:39:36 AM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Artieboy,


Don't call him that. He gets all butthurt and whines to the mods.

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 152
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 10:45:42 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

So Arturas, is domination about whips and ropes to you? Or something more? Just curious since it seems most of your posts revolve around sexplay as domination.



So, littlewonder, no, they are tools of the trade but are useless with out the desire, the confidence and the skills.


Good tools

I think the main thing you are missing here is that OP is in a cyber-only "relationship" that she has claimed is both "real" and "serious".
Then she goes on to ask about her Dom wanting a cyber-swap with another sub on a limited basis.


Whilst that sounds quite innocent, there are 2 main issues involved....

1) Firstly, the cyber-only aspect of the relationship. Regardless of your carefully planned 'scenes', in your situation the tools are indeed 'real' for both you and your sub.
In her case, they aren't. She can't feel them nor appreciate that whatever toy/tool she uses on herself at the end of a webcam for her 'Dom', it will never ever be the same as when someone else does it to her because she is in complete control of what she does - how hard, how often, how long etc.
In your scenes, or any other 'real' situation, the sub does not control the whip or paddle or whatever is in use at the time. That lack of control cannot be simulated at the remote end of a webcam no matter how hard you try.

2) Secondly, the sheer fact that her Dom has asked her to do a cyber-swap would appear to me that she is slowly slipping out of favour. If OP has invested more than enough of her time and energy to think/feel that this cyber-only relationship is "real" and "serious" then she is facing a severe let-down by her online Dom at some point - even more so as he has a significant other in his life who is actually real (his GF).
When that happens, she is going to feel totally torn apart and utterly distraught.

What we are trying to do is to tell her that this relationship is not really "real" and being only ever cyber-only cannot be construed as "serious" in any shape or form. Her Dom is only (ab)using her as wank fodder just so he can get his rocks off.
It doesn't seem as if OP's Dom is very "serious" about her or has any true feelings for her as a sub, a person or a contact, as you would normaly have in any 'real' M/s or D/s dynamic. Her question about doing a cyber-swap appears to bear that assumption out.



(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 11:31:10 AM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1
What we are trying to do is to tell her that this relationship is not really "real" and being only ever cyber-only cannot be construed as "serious" in any shape or form. Her Dom is only (ab)using her as wank fodder just so he can get his rocks off.

No, this would be your typical approach... one true way-ism. I certainly am not trying to suggest anything like that. Out of curiosity, do you believe long-distance marriages are not "real"? Is any relationship which doesn't match your own personal perceptions "unreal" to you? That seems like an odd stance to take on an alternative relationship discussion board.

I think her relationship with her dom IS real. But it's different enough from what we talk about here that it's not really possible for us to help her. Our viewpoints will be different. Our concerns will be different. The risks and rewards will all be different. Whatever she and her cyber-dom are doing is real to them. But different from what we do here.


_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 154
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:04:02 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14408
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
I guess I'm old fashioned. Personally, I believe that you have to have at least met someone to have a relationship with them. For me that is the difference between a long distance relationship and cyber.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 155
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:23:10 PM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1



What we are trying to do is to tell her that this relationship is not really "real" and being only ever cyber-only cannot be construed as "serious" in any shape or form. Her Dom is only (ab)using her as wank fodder just so he can get his rocks off.




That may be how YOU and other's define a real relationship but I know many who have LD D/s relationships that are very real. It's not about cyber sex (kinky or otherwise) it's about the power dynamic and relationship that they share.

People can and do have very real relationships utilizing the internet, webcams, telephone and even old fashioned snail mail. My ex, Phoenix and I did this for almost a year before I relocated to Maryland.

Who are you to say what is abusive to her anymore than I can say what is abusive in your relationships.

Perhaps a LDR isn't ideal for you but IMO that doesn't mean they aren't real or legitimate relationships.

< Message edited by TheLilSquaw -- 2/25/2013 12:24:01 PM >


_____________________________

LilSquaw
Lifestyle & ProSwitch
Fetish Model, Producer, and Website Owner

http://www.clips4sale.com/69201
http://www.kinkbomb.com/studio/Sadistic_Babygirl_

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 156
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:24:39 PM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1
What we are trying to do is to tell her that this relationship is not really "real" and being only ever cyber-only cannot be construed as "serious" in any shape or form. Her Dom is only (ab)using her as wank fodder just so he can get his rocks off.

No, this would be your typical approach... one true way-ism. I certainly am not trying to suggest anything like that. Out of curiosity, do you believe long-distance marriages are not "real"? Is any relationship which doesn't match your own personal perceptions "unreal" to you? That seems like an odd stance to take on an alternative relationship discussion board.

I think her relationship with her dom IS real. But it's different enough from what we talk about here that it's not really possible for us to help her. Our viewpoints will be different. Our concerns will be different. The risks and rewards will all be different. Whatever she and her cyber-dom are doing is real to them. But different from what we do here.


I don't think it's an odd stance at all.

And whilst there are many long distance relationships in the world, they are either considered as purely cyber or there are plans to meet up at some point to establish the sincerity and real-ness of that relationship.
Even for long-distance "marriages", they can't be "real" (certainly not in the eyes of the law of most countries) until consumated at least. And in these scenarios, most of the people involved plan and save to make that actually happen because the ultimate aim is for them to be together. I most certainly do not believe in any 'virtual' marriage where neither party does not, and has no intention of, actually meeting up.


And I acknowledged that to OP's mind they certainly do seem real and serious to her.
My argument is, that it can't be "real" unless there are plans to meet up and in her case she openly admits they are not going to - they don't have time to plan and organise any meets. Add that to the fact that her cyber-dom already has a significant other real person in his life, it is doomed to forever be cyber only or he'll drop her and find someone else to cyber with - as he has already asked to do by finding a cyber-swap sub in her place.
As others have also pointed out, in any normal relationship, vanilla or BDSM or kink, if it were anything close to being serious or real then the parties (usually the male) would move heaven and earth for them to at least meet up on some sort of regular basis - even if that is long periods apart.

And I disagree that OP's cyber-dom is seeing their relationship as "real".
As a few have already said on here, any 'real true Dom' wouldn't be looking to swapping-out their sub partners except maybe in a play situation.

It's not a case of 'one true way-ism' at all.
It's a simple case of cyber-only compared to any other form of actual 'real' contact.
A distinct difference between actual person-to-person contact and a remote webcam.

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 157
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:29:17 PM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1



And I acknowledged that to OP's mind they certainly do seem real and serious to her.
My argument is, that it can't be "real" unless there are plans to meet up and in her case she openly admits they are not going to - they don't have time to plan and organise any meets.



Nice to know that you are the dictator of what qualifies as a "REAL" relationship and what hoops one jump through to it to be qualified.

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

As a few have already said on here, any 'real true Dom' wouldn't be looking to swapping-out their sub partners except maybe in a play situation.


Real couples swap all the time. Lol
I've known a few d/s couples who swapped as well. Granted never online but eh... what ever works for them.


< Message edited by TheLilSquaw -- 2/25/2013 12:31:14 PM >


_____________________________

LilSquaw
Lifestyle & ProSwitch
Fetish Model, Producer, and Website Owner

http://www.clips4sale.com/69201
http://www.kinkbomb.com/studio/Sadistic_Babygirl_

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 158
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:37:21 PM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw
People can and do have very real relationships utilizing the internet, webcams, telephone and even old fashioned snail mail. My ex, Phoenix and I did this for almost a year before I relocated to Maryland.

Who are you to say what is abusive to her anymore than I can say what is abusive in your relationships.

Perhaps a LDR isn't ideal for you but IMO that doesn't mean they aren't real or legitimate relationships.


And this is the crux of my argument.
You obviously talked about and planned the ultimate move so that you could be together.

LDR's are ok and in the beginning it's fun.
But to make that leap of faith and start believing it's for 'real' and 'serious' (assuming both sides are reading from the same page), plans are eventually made for the real deal - however long that takes.
OP has already stated that isn't going to happen and it's cyber only.


I didn't say they weren't legitimate. I just said they aren't "real".
Real to me is something you can touch, smell, feel and interact with - not an image on a webcam.


But I am interpreting OP's posts as being very one-sided in nature.
She is young and impressionable and has taken the online bait hook, line, and sinker.
I see no investment from the other side at all.

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)
Profile   Post #: 159
RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? - 2/25/2013 12:44:51 PM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw
Real couples swap all the time. Lol
I've known a few d/s couples who swapped as well. Granted never online but eh... what ever works for them.


As we have!

But note the distinct difference - it's real - with real people and real interactions between everyone.



(in reply to TheLilSquaw)
Profile   Post #: 160
Page:   <<   < prev  5 6 7 [8] 9   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Swapping submissives for a few days? Page: <<   < prev  5 6 7 [8] 9   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2024
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.237