zpenguin -> Who really holds the power in a D/s relationship? (3/3/2013 11:49:40 AM)
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Food for thought Who really holds the power in a D/s relationship? This was a conversation myself and a former sub had, I thought it was interesting. Granted when you think of it without putting much thought you think oh the Dom does, well thats to a point. I speak for myself here not everyone, granted its easy to bark orders (in your subs mind this is disrespectful if she or he is new to you,,granted not always the case because lets face it some like it that way) but in order to have a healthy D/s relationship trust, caring, and kindness must also be displayed just as much if not more than the rough side. So that being said, I believe demanding something of someone upon first contact is silly, irrational, and disrespectful. The conclusion that myself and my former sub came to is, the submission of one to another is a gift. The submissive is willing to allow you to take control. They trust you with giving them what they desire(sexually that is), to protect them, guidance, and safety. My sub (we will call her Eve) was new to the scene when I met her, but she was very curious and willing to learn. I've had prior subs before Eve but she was the first one to question different aspects, and actually open my eyes to things I haven't thought of before. I believe the Dom only holds as much power as the submissive is willing to give them. Also on the flip side, the Dom holds as much power within that margin as he/she desires. Some are willing do the 24/7 and others its a bedroom or once in a blue moon deal. So what are your thoughts? Who really holds the power in a D/s relationship?
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