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Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 3:56:10 PM   
AAkasha


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My femdom (topping/lusting) urges tend to ebb and flow. They are always "there" but they can be a bit dormant, and then at times of VERY high stress combined with lack of sleep I get super intense urges and lusts and they are very distracting. They were the most prominent in college (exams) and early in my career around tight deadlines and travel (time zones). When I would play super intensely it would almost seem like I "got it out of my system" and have a drop in desire and feel pretty normal almost for awhile (maybe even a few weeks) but the desire would come back but never to fever pitch until those circumstances all hit again.

The other thing that would make those intense desires create huge distraction/lust/desire/ache would be unobtainable desire (like a muse in the form of a man I wanted but would not have - unquenchable need. Not being able to have my needs met).

Since I'm older and and have a steady partner and also a much more mellow job and am in control of my hours, I have a more controlled schedule - I have moments of intense stress but not as bad as college and my first corporate job. I have had less of those periods of times of intense femdom haze where I got days of just being a little out of my head, or they go for shorter periods of time. I am more just in "happy femdom land" - like a "light buzz" rather than intense unpredictable highs.

Recently I was put on topamax as a daily preventative to deal with migraines. Oddly, out of the blue, I have been feeling very out of sorts in a femdom way that is reminiscent of how it used to be in college or corporate. I have also had a bad work week and lack of sleep. But it does feel much more "mental" and I know that topamax can have some psychological side effects. I am at 200mg/day. I don't consider this a "bad" side effect. I am wondering if any kinky people who have taken this for migraines (as it's pretty common) have noticed an impact on kink libido. This is definitely a full on "femdom lust" that kind of came out of the blue. If there's a pill to make you (more) kinky, this would be it possibly.

Akasha

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 6:30:04 PM   
JustAMas


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It's interesting that you get kinky when you're stressed, and I think that that's also the case for most people. I think that BDSM activities are a reaction to stressors, when there's an urge to hurt oneself or others.

Imagine, you would not want to have rough sadistic or masochistic sex when you're completely happy and content.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 6:34:49 PM   
LadyPact


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I don't know anything about that particular medication. Sorry about that.

If it hadn't been for the second half of the post, I'd swear it was the same one from four or five years ago. I believe you had specifically asked about stress and/or lack of sleep kicking in the topping drive.


ETA - Yep. Here it is. http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1975567&key=stress


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 8/9/2013 6:37:59 PM >


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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 6:57:46 PM   
TieMeInKnottss


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Don't know about the meds but I do know that stress, feeling pressured, tired...I get an almost desperate need to submit and be topped...I equate it to.the way some people get stressed & need to exercise, some need to eat, some need sex...it is a coping mechanism. Doesn't mean the solution is always a good idea & can't lead to problems....

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:04:48 PM   
AAkasha


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't know anything about that particular medication. Sorry about that.

If it hadn't been for the second half of the post, I'd swear it was the same one from four or five years ago. I believe you had specifically asked about stress and/or lack of sleep kicking in the topping drive.


ETA - Yep. Here it is. http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1975567&key=stress




Stress and lack of sleep have always been a big driver of kink drive for me. But this particular round of dress/lack of sleep were pretty inconsequential so that's why I was wondering if it could be the medication. Especially since these kinds of drugs do often have odd impacts on libido in general.

I find myself unable to occupy myself with much more than looking at guys in bondage at the moment (lol). But hey ladies, here are some tips!

http://www.bondagejeopardy.com/ has great preview videos of their m/m bondage stuff - free. Worth looking at just to see cute bondage bon bons.

I always go look at the INXS video for "Taste It" - no action or music for about two mins into the clip - but the BEST music video EVER and better sensual kink and femdom than anything made in mainstream IMO. Wish it were a full length movie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ny8HFB2q7xU
(Michael Hutchence -RIP - Best sensual bottom behavior EVER!)

For a hot man in various bondage situations, I always go for Merlini, even though he's an escape artist: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8JL-QL43zM

And I think I will have to watch "Punish Me" again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc_XJsMwx2s

Anyway I am just fully distracted and not sleeping much with very little appetite and haven't felt this way since college. It's either stress or the meds, and I'm just not THAT stressed.

Akasha




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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:17:08 PM   
theshytype


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I've been on topamax in the past. I took myself off of it rather quickly due to side effects. The medication had the complete opposite effect on me as I became extremely moody, depressed, and completely uninterested in sex.
Of course, different medications affect people differently.

Without any medications, I have an extremely high libido. Stress does certainly increase it.

ETA: I did lose weight while on topamax - appetite suppression can be a side-effect.

< Message edited by theshytype -- 8/9/2013 7:19:50 PM >

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:17:39 PM   
JustAMas


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I've actually read that sexual urges in men increase when they're stressed, while sexual urges decrease for women. That makes sense, since men need to "spread their seed" before they die, and women need to protect their offspring.

So I wonder if BDSM activities are actually related to sex at all, or perhaps it's more psychological. When people have BDSM "urges", perhaps it actually has nothing to do with sexual desires or urges. You'll notice, that you get "horny" even when you're not horny, or you're not supposed to be horny. It's more sexual excitement than horniness.

< Message edited by JustAMas -- 8/9/2013 7:18:23 PM >

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:26:26 PM   
theshytype


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quote:

ORIGINAL: JustAMas

I've actually read that sexual urges in men increase when they're stressed, while sexual urges decrease for women. That makes sense, since men need to "spread their seed" before they die, and women need to protect their offspring.

So I wonder if BDSM activities are actually related to sex at all, or perhaps it's more psychological. When people have BDSM "urges", perhaps it actually has nothing to do with sexual desires or urges. You'll notice, that you get "horny" even when you're not horny, or you're not supposed to be horny. It's more sexual excitement than horniness.


I'm a woman and I just posted that my libido increases during stress.
But, I believe you may be on to something.

I was going to post a question on the board but wasn't sure how well received it would be.
From an essay I recently read, which defined a few "sub-categories" of masochism, I believe I can easily relate to both sexual and emotional masochism. Sometimes, pain is good to turn me on. Sometimes, it helps relieve stress.
I'm wondering if, perhaps, it's similar to the OP?

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:32:15 PM   
AAkasha


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quote:

ORIGINAL: JustAMas

I've actually read that sexual urges in men increase when they're stressed, while sexual urges decrease for women. That makes sense, since men need to "spread their seed" before they die, and women need to protect their offspring.

So I wonder if BDSM activities are actually related to sex at all, or perhaps it's more psychological. When people have BDSM "urges", perhaps it actually has nothing to do with sexual desires or urges. You'll notice, that you get "horny" even when you're not horny, or you're not supposed to be horny. It's more sexual excitement than horniness.


That's interesting. And you're right. I am not "horny" as in "I want to have orgasms," I am more lustful in a kinky way - I want to do my femdom (bondage, topping) stuff. I saw a psychologist for a little while when I was in my corporate job (hell, it was paid for, I figured, so why not? I was curious what she would say) and she said my kinky desires were related to control issues, even though I don't consider myself a control-freak type of person (I am not ocd about cleanliness etc). And while she pointed out things in my "life" that needed to be handled better (and she was right), I pointed out to her that I was "kinky" long before I had "responsibilities" to even worry about.

But she said when I felt out of control in my life, the urges would get more intense. That made total sense to me so I took that for what it was worth. But I didn't see tight deadlines, lack of sleep, intense work projects of being "out of control." That's just "busy." I have been "out of control" and not been extra kinky -- ie, friends in a bad situations I cannot control, waiting for answers on a problem that I cannot control, dug myself into a hole I could not find an answer -- those things diminish my kink mode because I go into "problem solving" mode.

The "rush" I get from working hard, playing hard, sleeping less, facing extreme *pressure* (and the lack of control maybe of my TIME, if anything) does impact it.

But never medication, ever. And like I said, the little "minor" road bump I hit this week with missing "some sleep" and having maybe 2 days of a jacked up work schedule do to some unplanned business meetings and a new business prospect turning things around on me should not have hit me like this -- but hitting 200mg of topamax four days ago and being at the time where my body should have just adjusted? Hmmm. Does make me wonder.


Akasha

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:38:36 PM   
roguetrip


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Molly is Mdma, the good stuff not ecstasy, Both based on the same thing tho

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:40:00 PM   
roguetrip


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And What I ment is , If before taking ecstasy You already have a strong mindset(preference) about the kinky stuff you want to do, It will multiply that preference by a lot , if you understand me

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 7:44:46 PM   
smurfslave


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Its been my experience that men have that horneyness from stress and its a physical release as well as a mental one...kind of like hitting a tree when ur mad. Woman's hornyness is a chemical reaction to male testosterone .... the urge to reproduce...our biological clocks.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/9/2013 8:09:21 PM   
JustAMas


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I would think that women would need to feel safe and protected when they're stressed, which is why they may get into abusive relationships when they're stressed - they want to feel safe at all costs. Or if they're doms, then they may want to "keep" their submissive partners - to feel safe.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

But she said when I felt out of control in my life, the urges would get more intense. That made total sense to me so I took that for what it was worth. But I didn't see tight deadlines, lack of sleep, intense work projects of being "out of control." That's just "busy." I have been "out of control" and not been extra kinky -- ie, friends in a bad situations I cannot control, waiting for answers on a problem that I cannot control, dug myself into a hole I could not find an answer -- those things diminish my kink mode because I go into "problem solving" mode.

The "rush" I get from working hard, playing hard, sleeping less, facing extreme *pressure* (and the lack of control maybe of my TIME, if anything) does impact it.

Akasha


I'm not sure if I buy the "control" thing, either. But how do you feel when you're under pressure, closing on deadlines, etc? You're going to feel, "OMG! I can't do this! I'm a terrible person if I screw up! I can't let others down!", etc, right? So... how do you think that relates to BDSM activities.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/13/2013 1:08:41 PM   
mummyman321


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Drugs can heighten any type of feeling. So if you are feeling kinky it certainly can let the mood flow. Does it cause you to be kinky? No.

Topamax besides being used for migraines is also use as an antiepileptic. One of its side effects is an increase in the aggressor response. So if one is Dominant and possible side effect to increase that response.

As people has already said, stress can also be a trigger for Dominant/kink response. Then again so can the rent being due :)

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/13/2013 2:16:01 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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This is totally off topic, but good to see you Mummy and glad to read that everything is going so well for you!

Edited for clarity as to who was being bad.

< Message edited by MissToYouRedux -- 8/13/2013 3:15:26 PM >


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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/13/2013 2:30:07 PM   
mummyman321


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Hi Miss Marie,
I have missed posting but I have really enjoyed my stay in Germany. It is a very fun time.

I was dead on topic. The OP asked if there was a pill to make one Kinky? And she stated she taking Topamax. I thought I was pretty straightforward in answering that with a good medical explanation.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/13/2013 3:14:14 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321

I was dead on topic.


Yes, you were! *I* was the one that wasn't.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/13/2013 3:34:08 PM   
mummyman321


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissToYouRedux


quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321

I was dead on topic.


Yes, you were! *I* was the one that wasn't.



LOL
Slaps head and say duh! Wow I really missed that one!

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/14/2013 7:31:14 AM   
evesgrden


Posts: 597
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't know anything about that particular medication. Sorry about that.

If it hadn't been for the second half of the post, I'd swear it was the same one from four or five years ago. I believe you had specifically asked about stress and/or lack of sleep kicking in the topping drive.


ETA - Yep. Here it is. http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1975567&key=stress




Stress and lack of sleep have always been a big driver of kink drive for me. But this particular round of dress/lack of sleep were pretty inconsequential so that's why I was wondering if it could be the medication. Especially since these kinds of drugs do often have odd impacts on libido in general.

I find myself unable to occupy myself with much more than looking at guys in bondage at the moment (lol). But hey ladies, here are some tips!

http://www.bondagejeopardy.com/ has great preview videos of their m/m bondage stuff - free. Worth looking at just to see cute bondage bon bons.

I always go look at the INXS video for "Taste It" - no action or music for about two mins into the clip - but the BEST music video EVER and better sensual kink and femdom than anything made in mainstream IMO. Wish it were a full length movie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ny8HFB2q7xU
(Michael Hutchence -RIP - Best sensual bottom behavior EVER!)

For a hot man in various bondage situations, I always go for Merlini, even though he's an escape artist: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8JL-QL43zM

And I think I will have to watch "Punish Me" again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc_XJsMwx2s

Anyway I am just fully distracted and not sleeping much with very little appetite and haven't felt this way since college. It's either stress or the meds, and I'm just not THAT stressed.

Akasha



Wow.. between not having felt this way since college, and the videos, this thread should be good for business. I remember you said something in another thread about helping other findommes ... did you include recommendations to do what you've done here? Talk about your increased desires and then offering porn freebies as a way to entice new clients? My bet is this should be rather effective for the guys who want to pay.

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RE: Is there a pill to make one kinky? - 8/14/2013 8:25:02 AM   
AAkasha


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Joined: 11/27/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: evesgrden



Wow.. between not having felt this way since college, and the videos, this thread should be good for business. I remember you said something in another thread about helping other findommes ... did you include recommendations to do what you've done here? Talk about your increased desires and then offering porn freebies as a way to entice new clients? My bet is this should be rather effective for the guys who want to pay.



LOL...did you click on the links? They appeal to women (trust me on that). One is GAY porn, even. Men will be very disappointed. Well, "Punish Me" has SOME appeal, but still, the focus is on the guy (who is hot) and the woman is...well....old. Good theory though. :)

Great way to entice new "clients" -- post videos of gay guys tying each other up! Marketing 101.

_____________________________

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Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

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