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how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/22/2013 11:17:00 PM   
ballionsnow


Posts: 1
Joined: 12/22/2013
Status: offline 		How can I be the best sub/slave I can be?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/22/2013 11:31:12 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Obey . . . that pretty much covers it.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to ballionsnow)
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RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/22/2013 11:31:30 PM   
petitespot


Posts: 288
Joined: 7/3/2006
From: Surfside Beach, SC
Status: offline 		Do what you're told to do. Preferably with a smile.

_____________________________


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RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/22/2013 11:50:29 PM   
MstrPBK


Posts: 573
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: petitespot

Do what you're told to do. Preferably with a smile.


As long as it is within the law (mind you that is my own personal biased opinion there).

MstrPBK
St Paul, MN USA

(in reply to petitespot)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 3:17:04 AM   
lilcracker


Posts: 243
Joined: 4/14/2012
Status: offline 		find someone who rocks your world to submit to...sorry but for me any Dom is not going to cut it for me.

(in reply to ballionsnow)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 3:49:05 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		Find the person who inspires your submission, then serve him/her/them with a willing and glad heart.


Edited to add:

Don't eat pistachios in bed. Those teeny tiny little bits of shell can be a real bitch...


< Message edited by myotherself -- 12/23/2013 3:51:21 AM >

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


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Profile   Post #: 6
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 6:46:57 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		You will likely get more useful information if you are more specific. Are you having particular challenges in a current relationship? If so, what are they?

If you are not in a relationship, picking someone with whom you are compatible and who is worthy of submission is key.

Take a look at the non-fiction in this link and buy the ones that appeal to you: http://www.collarchat.com/m_1726118/tm.htm

Learning to obey in a vanilla setting helped me - the military, work, volunteer jobs. Also practicing letting go of the need to be right. This is currently manifesting when we are driving together, lol.

(in reply to ballionsnow)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 7:51:37 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ballionsnow

How can I be the best sub/slave I can be?


Start by being the best PERSON you can be.

Work on your communication skills - they are essential to any strong relationship. You should be able to express your feelings and worries calmly without making accusations, listen to what your partner has to say (even if you don't like it) and look for a compromise.

Be responsible. You're 18, so even if you are super mature, you are new to being an adult. Get some practice at holding down a job (and/or finish college), paying your bills on time, keeping your home tidy etc.

Be fascinating. Try lots of different things and cultivate some hobbies. Almost any hobbies will do - try to have some variety. Eat foreign foods, travel if you can afford it, read voraciously, play sports, join clubs, create things, and learn practical skills.

Find someone who suits you and take your time before submitting. This was my mistake. I found an awesome guy but tried to jump right in to 24/7 slavery when in reality I wasn't ready - I needed to grow up more and mature and start more slowly. Date lots of people. Don't submit to someone who proves they can't be trusted - if you know them to lie, cheat, or generally live a life of chaos, you probably shouldn't trust them to run your life.

Think with your brain, not your penis. Your penis is not always your friend.

Reflect on things that go wrong - see them as an opportunity for growth. Try to set things right and be responsible for your own mistakes. Be sure to make some mistakes.

Be honest about what you want and need, both with the dominant and with yourself. Don't get stuck in a relationship which doesn't suit you because you think submission must look a certain way. If it's making you both happy, you're doing it right. If not, you're doing it wrong - regardless of what other people do in their relationships.

Remember real life isn't porn, and submission isn't always fun and sexy. Sometimes it's boring or inconvenient. Remember that submission means yielding to the will of another, even when you don't want to. Be sure to choose someone who won't ask you to submit to things that could harm you or will have a negative impact on your life. Walk away if someone treats you like shit. Everyone has that right, be they dom, sub, slave or whatever.

And then, yes, obey.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to ballionsnow)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 8:14:12 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ballionsnow

How can I be the best sub/slave I can be?


Why should you be?

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to ballionsnow)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 9:04:43 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Athena was very thorough. But, honestly, your question is so vague that we can't answer it.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 9:05:31 AM   
MalcolmNathaniel


Posts: 1394
Joined: 9/20/2010
Status: offline 		The really simple answer: Obey.

Slightly more complex: Anticipate needs and fulfil them.

Complex answer: Talk to your dom so that you are fully aware of what is expected of you and thoroughly understand what is being said and then obey.

Notice the similarity between the easiest answer and the hardest? Obey.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 10:30:57 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Be your authentic self. Be honest. Pick a partner who is compatible, who wants the responsibilities more than the rights.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to MalcolmNathaniel)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 7:03:26 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Obey . . . that pretty much covers it.


YUP. This.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/23/2013 9:48:49 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MalcolmNathaniel
The really simple answer: Obey.

Slightly more complex: Anticipate needs and fulfil them.

Complex answer: Talk to your dom so that you are fully aware of what is expected of you and thoroughly understand what is being said and then obey.

Notice the similarity between the easiest answer and the hardest? Obey.

Sage advice.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to MalcolmNathaniel)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/24/2013 7:18:08 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Obey . . . that pretty much covers it.

And don't forget that in BDSM, style points do count

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/24/2013 7:27:56 AM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ballionsnow

How can I be the best sub/slave I can be?


Find the best dominant for you
Stir
Enjoy!!!


_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to ballionsnow)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/26/2013 12:36:07 PM   
Pyramus


Posts: 397
Joined: 5/14/2010
Status: offline 		If only every submissive asked that question ...

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/26/2013 12:41:56 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyramus

If only every submissive asked that question ...



I find who is ask to be much more important. Frankly, the OP should consider who they should be asking alittle more carefully.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Pyramus)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be - 12/26/2013 5:37:42 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Be your authentic self. Be honest. Pick a partner who is compatible, who wants the responsibilities more than the rights.

This is what I was thinking, but Des beat me to it.

Sure, "Obey" seems to be the standard answer, but WHO are you obeying? Is that person right for you? Does it feel *right* to obey him/her? If it's the wrong person, "obey" might be the worst answer out there.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 19
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