Emperor1956
Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
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I was mostly watching this thread unroll, and I have to say that generally I like the style of almost everyone posting. WyrdRich, nice job of asking what could have been taken as dismissive or insulting questions in a way that absolutely was not either dismissive or insulting. Most everyone responding: nice job of not perceiving insults that weren't there, or feeling a bait was being trolled that you had to rise to.
I find it interesting that many of those who say "I don't get it" focus on the issue of "how do I know he/she is doing what I ask them to do?" Sometimes this even becomes a fear that the person on the other side of the monitor is mocking you (as twicehappy said).
In fact, from my fairly limited experience of online training/submission, this doesn't happen. It takes too much work to do it well for either party to be engaged for very long if it isn't genuine. For that matter, how do you know your real life partner isn't mocking you the moment he/she leaves your presence? Or Dominants, how do you know your sub isn't mentally mocking you with every "instruction" he or she carries out? I would hope the answer in both cases is that there is a deep enough level of trust that this question never seriously considered.
I also agree with holly's comments that many real life D/s relationships have an element of control and communication that does not involve face-to-face contact. The control that a Dominant exerts over his/her submissive is just as real if it is an "until we meet again" order, or one given over the computer to an online partner.
I will say that there is one huge area where for Me, online training and submission doesn't mirror "real life" (and I don't think anyone sensible is advocating that the two are the same). That area is risk. Personal physical and emotional risk simply isn't evoked at all to the same degree when there isn't a direct physical connection. A part of the turn on in D/s play for Me is the charged feeling of my girl being "at risk" in some degree, even though she trusts Me absolutely. So adventuring into some new area of physical play, or exploring some word, idea, or role that has formerly been forbidden, simply works much better skin to skin.
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"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.
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RE: I don't get it (no pun intended) - 
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