dreamlady
Posts: 737
Joined: 9/13/2007
From: Western MD
Status: offline
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orgasmdenial12, I understand much better where you're coming from by elaborating upon your CMS philosophy. Then shiftyw has raised pertinent issues which don't "fit" into those puzzle pieces. But due to time constraints, let me focus on the following instead:
quote:
ORIGINAL: NookieNotes
So, how is superiority? Power = superior?
What is the superiority difference? For example, I believe that I am the right one to lead in my relationships, and that in any relationship I am in, I will lead. However, I don't hold that that makes me superior, even if I am better in that particular skill.
That's the gist of it then, where belief system collides with value system or, conversely, where the two become integrated. Superiority has to do with placing more value upon one quality or personal attribute over another. It still boils down to inferiority being perceived as "less" than and "lower" than. If the Dominant partner perceives himself or herself to be superior to the submissive partner, and the submissive partner sees himself or herself as being inferior to the Dominant partner, then this goes beyond belief system into value system, where apparent power and authority become the defining factors. In terms of D/s, this is where many Dominants have placed a greater value on their dominance over another, which then makes the D/s power exchange unbalanced. Equal value is not being exchanged because the submissive's submission has already been devalued.
I don't believe that a parent staying home to raise children is of less value than the parent who works outside the home, something which wasn't as much a division of labor back when we had more agrarian-based societies, or in an agrarian-based society. Even in more patriarchal-leaning nomadic herding cultures, children spent/spend more time helping and being taught by their fathers. (Mongolian girls learn to become expert horseriders, archers and hunters. Males learn how to prepare goat milk products for their own sustenance, and young males without brides are taught how to fend for themselves domestically, or how to be self-sustaining. Independence from others and from outsiders - basic survival skills themselves - is more valued than being relegated to gender roles, as well as interdependent clan loyalty.)
I also don't believe that taking on a nurturing role, raising a family and running a household is inferior to competing in the outside world with others. Both of these functions complement one another.
Do males tend to be more competitive than females? One could argue that a largely testosterone-fueled entity will jockey for positions of power and authority more than an entity who is more group or teamwork-oriented. But, I don't see where the interests of the team and of community should be devalued over individual achievement or personal authority; and I have never beheld a working, functioning model which can succeed based on these types of Superiority/inferiority valuations, whether historically or culturally.
There are many closet believers whose privately-held beliefs may not ever spill over into their public life.
I believe that is what orgasmdenial has trying to explain to the rest of us who are not CMS or CFS believers. But I still don't see how this is a "legitimate" fetish or kink, or where it belongs in BDSM beyond role-playing.
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RE: Bit Controversial - Consensual Male Supremacy? - 
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