LadyPact
Posts: 32566
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ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant See, she loves me, really loves me... she doesn't ever slip on kid gloves with me :) Yeah, but you knew that already. quote:
So, in an effort for me to wrap my mind around the courtesy/respect conundrum, I'll substitute "respect" with "courtesy" in a few statements that mean something to me... I have a great deal of "courtesy" for the works of: Marcus Aurelius and his meditations. Although I've never met him, I have great "courtesy" for his writing. Ieoh Ming Pei and his architectural genius, although I've never met him, I have a great deal of "courtesy" for his work. Vincent Van Gogh... Brahms, Schubert, Prince, David Bowie, Maria Brink, Georgia O'Keeffe, Voltair, Da Vinci, blah blah blah... The people above never earned my respect, their acts, actions, essence inspired my respect. That said, they may have demons buried within their pasts that could damage the respect I have for them, but until those are revealed I will continue to respect them. The terms aren't necessarily interchangeable re·spect rəˈspekt/ noun noun: respect 1. a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements. This is something that should be right up your alley because a person's achievements can get you to respect their work. However, other actions can cause you to lose that respect. It will depend on which area holds more value to you. O.J. Simpson, Michael Jackson, Jared Fogle, a number of Catholic priests... Not little stuff or minor mistakes. I do know there are areas where that redemption thing, ain't happening. quote:
I have oodles of respect for ~steff, because she is brilliant and very knowledgable in the lifestyle. I rarely extend her courtesy because her crass nature gives me the heebee jeebies, but that does not diminish the respect I have for her. I'd call that personality clash. Not enough of one to detract from the reasons that you respect her. quote:
That said, my personal perception/execution of "respect vs. courtesy" is simply my own. I do not ever put the "best foot forward" because I choose to be me and I do not ever want to "maintain" who I am not (best foot forward). I can/will respect someone for who they are for as long as they are "genuine" in who they are. Clearly I am wired differently because I choose to offer and extend respect until someone proves themselves unworthy of such. Meeting them in person is not a requirement for me to respect them... I have many people on this site that I have a great deal of respect for, Col. Sanders, and have never met them, most likely will not ever meet them, but their consistency in who they are and their ability to ADMIT/OWN their fault(s), failings, or simply acknowledge difference of opinion is all I need to sustain the respect that I freely extended to them sans their need to earn it. Jus sayin I think this is why I liked Ishtar's post on this thread so much. We don't all see this in the same way and the way she illustrated it was quite good. I probably am more the scale type because I interweave it with certain things. Perhaps it could be looked at as you give the respect immediately, but keeping it is the earning part for you. (?)
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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie. Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread
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