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Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 7:35:01 PM

Posts: 240
Joined: 5/2/2016
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It happens that one of my sent messages gets the status "deleted unread".

As one can read the first part of a message without selecting it, by just moving their mouse pointer to the message, I suppose these people delete messages unread based on some content of the first part of a message that doesn't please them. In my case, it is probably my age (63 years old), which I mention most of the time at the beginning of a message when presenting myself.

On the one hand, I admire women who realize that, by causing my message to get a status of "deleted unread", they very well know how to hurt my feelings.

On the other hand, I feel it is a sad reaction. I prefer people who at least read my message. And I prefer even more the rare people who answer with "No, thank you".

How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come, when people just delete a message unread? Is this the BDSM world, into which mutual respect is supposed to be evident?

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 7:53:11 PM

TheRomanticDomme

Posts: 15
Joined: 3/28/2016
Status: offline

I have no idea where you got the idea that there's more mutual respect in the BDSM world. People are shitty no matter what lifestyle/community/whatever that you're into. And don't assume they hovered over your message either. There's a good chance you got put in the "bulk mail" folder due to age, location or some other reason and then simply deleted in bulk along with everyone else.

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 8:03:42 PM

Posts: 196
Joined: 11/28/2007
From: NYC
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: QualityFirst

How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come, when people just delete a message unread? Is this the BDSM world, into which mutual respect is supposed to be evident?

Consider a few things:

No one owes you a blessed thing. That's some sense of entitlement you're rocking there. People have lives. They may be too busy to bother with an individual reply to every inappropriate (even if polite) email.

Location. Age. Sexual preference. Orientation. I could go on... Get the picture?

Also a very good point made by @TheRomanticDomme;

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheRomanticDomme

I have no idea where you got the idea that there's more mutual respect in the BDSM world. People are shitty no matter what lifestyle/community/whatever that you're into. And don't assume they hovered over your message either. There's a good chance you got put in the "bulk mail" folder due to age, location or some other reason and then simply deleted in bulk along with everyone else.

This isn't some magical land where the trials and tribulations of the vanilla world suddenly cease to exist. In fact, they're magnified here. To the power of ten. Don't be offended. It's life. Move on.

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 8:19:14 PM

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

You do not understand one simple fact: women get bombarded with emails, sometimes hundreds of them a day.
If they were to spend just a few seconds with a "thanks but no thanks" reply that could take hours a day.

That your feelings are actually hurt says you are much too emotionally invested in each email, with women you haven't yet met.

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 8:42:36 PM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: QualityFirst
It happens that one of my sent messages gets the status "deleted unread".

As one can read the first part of a message without selecting it, by just moving their mouse pointer to the message, I suppose these people delete messages unread based on some content of the first part of a message that doesn't please them. In my case, it is probably my age (63 years old), which I mention most of the time at the beginning of a message when presenting myself.

On the one hand, I admire women who realize that, by causing my message to get a status of "deleted unread", they very well know how to hurt my feelings.

On the other hand, I feel it is a sad reaction. I prefer people who at least read my message. And I prefer even more the rare people who answer with "No, thank you".

How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come, when people just delete a message unread? Is this the BDSM world, into which mutual respect is supposed to be evident?

I am one of the women who deletes 95% of the messages as deleted unread.

My policy on email doesn't have anything to do with you. In the grand scheme of things, I think you should realize it doesn't have anything to do with your feelings. This is not the EEO or any kind of charity. People don't owe you anything just because you decided to bang out of few key strokes. If you believe they do, I would put you to the task of answering all of the junk mail that arrives to you via post for the next year. All of those grocery coupons, insurance offers, and sales circulars wrote to you, too, right? When you write back to all of them for a year, I'll answer your email.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 10:17:33 PM

Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline

Everyone does it so, it must be the right thing.

What a bunch of undiluted bullshit.

Michael

_____________________________

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Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 11:29:04 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr

Everyone does it so, it must be the right thing.

What a bunch of undiluted bullshit.

Isn't it past your over-inflated sense of entitlement's bedtime Michael?

Peace and comfort.

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/7/2016 11:34:43 PM

Posts: 2849
Joined: 9/11/2008
Status: offline

I spent too damn long at sea ........................I really should try and stop using naval terminology.

(in reply to Dvr22999874)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 1:10:58 AM

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Joined: 9/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dvr22999874

I spent too damn long at sea ........................I really should try and stop using naval terminology.

I'm glad you said that. I was wondering what the hell you meant!

_____________________________

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(in reply to Dvr22999874)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 1:14:46 AM

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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quote:

That your feelings are actually hurt says you are much too emotionally invested in each email, with women you haven't yet met.

That's the key point, for me. It saves a lot of grief on all sides when you can get that together.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to angelikaJ)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 2:02:24 AM

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
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Here's a whole 16-page thread dealing with exactly this problem -
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4844300/mpage_1/tm.htm

It might be prudent for you to read it all to save us all repeating ourselves... again.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 2:24:29 AM

Posts: 196
Joined: 3/8/2016
Status: offline

JUST DO NOT CHECK.

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 3:23:06 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1
Here's a whole 16-page thread dealing with exactly this problem -
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4844300/mpage_1/tm.htm

It might be prudent for you to read it all to save us all repeating ourselves... again.

I'm not sure it's terribly fair to use that one, FD. While an excellent example of those who are touched in the head, we don't want to put that off on everyone.

A thought on this subject came to me just a moment ago. I wonder how many folks screen their calls via caller ID? I can say that I do. (Some people on this thread already know this.) If a person's number isn't entered in my contact list, I'm really not picking up because I have no interest in whatever the other party is 'cold calling' (it's a telemarketing term) me about. I already have car insurance, a long distance carrier, make my charitable contributions as I see fit, or any other thing that a person that I don't know might be contacting me about. If I wanted to buy what a person was selling, I'd contact them.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 3:54:48 AM

Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline

some very good points here, I just deleted a message this morning that I got last night, someone just sent me his email, like what in the heck am I supposed to do with that?

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 4:20:27 AM

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1
Here's a whole 16-page thread dealing with exactly this problem -
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4844300/mpage_1/tm.htm

It might be prudent for you to read it all to save us all repeating ourselves... again.

I'm not sure it's terribly fair to use that one, FD. While an excellent example of those who are touched in the head, we don't want to put that off on everyone.

A thought on this subject came to me just a moment ago. I wonder how many folks screen their calls via caller ID? I can say that I do. (Some people on this thread already know this.) If a person's number isn't entered in my contact list, I'm really not picking up because I have no interest in whatever the other party is 'cold calling' (it's a telemarketing term) me about. I already have car insurance, a long distance carrier, make my charitable contributions as I see fit, or any other thing that a person that I don't know might be contacting me about. If I wanted to buy what a person was selling, I'd contact them.

Good points LP.
But not everyone has 'caller ID' - I don't and not many over here do (it's not a commonly available feature).
But I do that on my cell phone tho. I don't answer witheld numbers and if it's someone I don't want to speak to, they'll get answered the first time and I save their number with a 'no entry' sign by their name so that next time I let it ring.

Back to the topic, the thread I linked to started off with that person being all butt-hurt because he felt that he deserved a reply - which was pretty much what OP was alluding to here with his comment "...by causing my message to get a status of "deleted unread", they very well know how to hurt my feelings".
Several on here said that the sense of self-entitlement and thin skin implies that OP invested far too much emotion into an email to an unknown internet entity.

The butt-hurt continued with "How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come, when people just delete a message unread?".
Just prior to that, he says "I prefer people who at least read my message. And I prefer even more the rare people who answer with "No, thank you""
There have been several threads all over the place where women have extensively explained that a rejection reply often causes even more grief than they want or need from such men.

I know the thread drifted quite a bit but I felt it was quite poignant and addressed OP's question.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 4:27:49 AM

Posts: 40310
Status: offline

Ive started to do the same. Delete unchecked, unless its someone from the forum side.
I neither have the time or inclination to go thru messages when Im not even looking.

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 5:37:16 AM

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

Just because you personally disagree with something doesn't make it wrong.

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 6:22:55 AM

Posts: 40310
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

Just because you personally disagree with something doesn't make it wrong.

you havent met michael before? grins

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to angelikaJ)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 6:24:26 AM

Posts: 1614
Joined: 11/5/2014
From: South Bay (SF & Silicon Valley)
Status: offline

In the order of occurrence ...

quote:

ORIGINAL: QualityFirst
How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come?

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheRomanticDomme
There's a good chance you got put in the "bulk mail" folder due to age, location or some other reason

quote:

ORIGINAL: Shandirra
No one owes you a blessed thing.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
women get bombarded with emails, sometimes hundreds of them a day.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
it doesn't have anything to do with your feelings.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr
Everyone does it

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
If I wanted to buy what a person was selling, I'd contact them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76
what in the heck am I supposed to do with that?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic
I neither have the time or inclination to go thru messages when Im not even looking.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
Just because you personally disagree with something doesn't make it wrong.

All of the above...

(in reply to QualityFirst)

RE: Deleted unread - 5/8/2016 6:45:55 AM

Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: QualityFirst

It happens that one of my sent messages gets the status "deleted unread".

As one can read the first part of a message without selecting it, by just moving their mouse pointer to the message, I suppose these people delete messages unread based on some content of the first part of a message that doesn't please them. In my case, it is probably my age (63 years old), which I mention most of the time at the beginning of a message when presenting myself.

On the one hand, I admire women who realize that, by causing my message to get a status of "deleted unread", they very well know how to hurt my feelings.

On the other hand, I feel it is a sad reaction. I prefer people who at least read my message. And I prefer even more the rare people who answer with "No, thank you".

How far has the lack of elementary respect for each other come, when people just delete a message unread? Is this the BDSM world, into which mutual respect is supposed to be evident?

You can check the box next to the message, save it to your inbox, read the entire thing, and decide if it's an asswipe and delete it unread.

< Message edited by ExiledTyrant -- 5/8/2016 6:46:05 AM >

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to QualityFirst)

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