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HoneyBears -> RE: Is pussy licking a fetish or vanilla when it's an obsession? (5/16/2016 4:52:07 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: verbatimguy
quote:
ORIGINAL: Greta75
I think it's a vanilla thing.
In my personal experience. 99.9% of men in the casual sex world, just wants to bury their head in your pussy for hours, and never want to come out of it.
It's almost impossible for me to find a man who doesn't want to lick pussy and this is from all nationalities!
And that's the worst nightmare for a woman like me. who absolutely HATES my pussy being licked. Because the guy will just go on non stop about trying to convince you to let him lick you.
I have met more men who hates receiving blow job, than men who hates licking pussy.
I prefer licking pussy to getting a blowjob but I don't hate getting a blowjob.]
I don't ask men if they like or hate getting a bj but I don't think I can say I have met anyone who mentioned that they hate it.
I also have never met a woman who hated getting licked but I haven't met many women in my life so my sample size is small.
To me pussy is a fetish but not a need so if a need is part of the word fetish than it's just something I love to do more than any thing else.
I prefer it over sex but I don't hate sex either but I need sex of some sort so myabe the sex is the fetish?
An addiction is not a fetish; however, a fetish can become addictive to the fetishist. Fetishes have to do with either sexual arousal, erotic gratification, or as a replacement for engaging in sexual relations. (In that sense, there are BDSM kink activities which can become a fetish, as a substitute for having sex.)
Technically, a fetish requires a fetish object. The fetish object gets objectified.
Simply finding something erotic, or worshipping an object does not make it a BDSM fetish. Our primitive ancestors worshipped fertility "fetish" objects, and so do indigenous tribal peoples contemporaneously. For many generations, the Chinese had a fetish for tiny feet. Many Chinese females were tortured and mutilated, including the breaking of bones, in order to bind their feet to remain unnaturally small. It was done non-consensually to young females to make them marriageable, so not BDSM (which must be consensually entered into between adults). It was a cultural fetish of traditional vanilla proportions.
Needing sex is not a fetish, and neither are non-kinky sexual obsessions. Having a sex addiction is not a fetish.
You are using the term "fetish" very loosely. If you must think of it as a fetish, then it is a vanilla "fetish" as common as any other vanilla "fetish": Being a tits/ass/leg man, only finding yourself attracted to certain body types or physiognomies, certain ethnicities, certain hair color, certain eye color, certain kinds of facial hair, etc.
I know that kinks are often characterized as not the *norm* but that is too generalized also (because what is culturally normal for you may not be culturally normal for another).
Since we all have different opinions about what is normal, typical, conventional, or socially acceptable, those terms are not helpful in defining what is the difference between vanilla sex practices (coital, oral, anal) and a BDSM sexual *perversion/deviance*.
The short answer is, preferring one form of vanilla sex over another does not a fetish make, and having vanilla sex is not practicing BDSM or a paraphilia. It is just engaging in vanilla sex.
-- Lisa & Cub
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