RE: puella's and Crappy's wedding bliss plans

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RE: puella's and Crappy's wedding bliss plans - 7/23/2006 6:20:19 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
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nope.....you are far more delightful to watch as you cook with them on...they stay on.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

whoooo hooo....now its a par tay...... lobster nipple clamps...for every one!

Um....Kinda hard to *cook* with lobsters hanging from my nipples. Can I forego that particular delight and just cook the lobsters???

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Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

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"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

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RE: Getting over it - 7/23/2006 6:21:07 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: stanton

Hey!? Where can I get those lobster nipple clamps?

So... how bout those Mets? yawn.....

Dollar Tree

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Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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Post #: 442

RE: Getting over it - 7/23/2006 6:22:00 PM

stanton

Posts: 41
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Awwright! Clam bake for all!!!!!! <evil>

(in reply to juliaoceania)

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Post #: 443

RE: Getting over it - 7/23/2006 6:23:36 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
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looks you up and down.....how many ya want...you like like a five to sixer to me.....

quote:

ORIGINAL: stanton

Hey!? Where can I get those lobster nipple clamps?

So... how bout those Mets? yawn.....

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to stanton)

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Post #: 444

RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 12:53:54 AM

Mavis

Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Noah

And if there is anyone left in the WORLD who still believes that you can't punish a masochist, drop her off at my house. I promise you I will prove myself to be the the Copernicus who will re-arrange the planets of your psychological world view. You will be able to do ALL THE BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION YOU WANT just by THREATENING whats left of her with a return visit. And there is no set of limits that I can't do it within. Copernicus ..or was it Ptolemy? Anyway ...

And I aint' braggin'. I'm just sayin'.

::: packing for a quick visit to the Ark...

but every time i think i've gotten to the end of this thread, another page is added, so i'll be a bit delayed..

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Post #: 445

RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 1:22:14 AM

Ornerylittlebrat

Posts: 15
Joined: 7/21/2006
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coming into this life style as a newbie...i'm glad to hear that not all punish...that is one thing that drives me away from this life...the fear of punishment...living in a day to day real life world i am the voice that is heard at work...i run the office. but when i come home i will have to switch gears and give up that athority...makes it ease my mind to see so many that do not punish for little things that happen and will happen that is sometimes out of our control...altho i have no problem with punishment that is needed for things that i was in control of but i believe it is my duty to keep that from happening...just my opinion

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Post #: 446

RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 1:32:08 AM

Mavis

Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Caretakr

I think far too many dysfunctional people use the lifestyle as a bandaid to cover some pretty severe lacks. "I totally suck at regular relationships, so if I gain/lose power that's going to make everything all right."
Bullshit, you will just be a fuck-up in a power imbalance dynamic.

i would agree on that. Kind of cracked me up too. but those people will not find "the fix" here either, we really do need to wholes to make one whole couple.. (or 3 + wholes if poly)

But geez, can you at least conceed that enjoying or needing punishment as part of our dynamic is not the same as being dysfunctional.. there are differences between bratting/ attention getting behaviors (which do make some couples very happy!) and the basically earnest sub who occasionally needs the purging release of physical dominance, and that "Play" doesn't quite do that. "creating a scene" is just that, creating a largley scripted, played out fiction, and that doesn't serve the purpose for some of us. But that play is very satisfying for some.. there was a thread that touched on some of this earlier, and you may have taken only the "acting- out to get spanks" kind of mindeset from that discussion, but i assure you there was more to it than that.

You've only assumed that ALL people with punishment needs live that way daily, but my experience with the few subs who discuss a punishment dynamic, it's very infrequent, for exactly the reasons You state.. it could become pretty taxing, and it possibly could absolve otherwise capable submissives of coping with their little guilts in proactive and productive ways.

i think If you met a few matured, balanced, people who practice this as part of their dynamic, it might not be so easy to equate us with emotional cripples. and maybe yu'd cuss us less?

(in reply to Caretakr)

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Post #: 447

RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 8:30:14 AM

girl4you2

Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I never have had a relationship or saw a relationship that failed that we weren't both losers, and we both didn't need to get over ourselves, and we both weren't bitches along the way..

...personally I find men that piss and moan about their former partners to be just as flawed in themselves,., they just can't own it.

i think this would be true no matter which side of the coin you're on. it takes two to begin and two to end a relationship. there are two who lose out, and there are two who contribute to the decline, not just one. two givers, two takers, two heart breakers, two hearts broken.

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maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

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RE: puella's and Crappy's wedding bliss plans - 7/24/2006 8:58:28 AM

mtumwawaBwana

Posts: 541
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what new wedding plans happened while i was away at work????

(in reply to girl4you2)

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RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 10:51:37 AM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: girl4you2
i think this would be true no matter which side of the coin you're on. it takes two to begin and two to end a relationship. there are two who lose out, and there are two who contribute to the decline, not just one. two givers, two takers, two heart breakers, two hearts broken.

It's hard to disagree with that, but it's so vague and general that it really says nothing. "Contribute" is such a wonderfully ambiguous word. Enabling is contributing, yes? And making a decision to no longer enable is also contributing, right?

Bob

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When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

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RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 12:35:00 PM

stanton

Posts: 41
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

looks you up and down.....how many ya want...you like like a five to sixer to me.....

The more the merrier! I'm a big guy... and can take on a few ;)

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RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 4:50:29 PM

sublizzie

Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: stanton

The more the merrier! I'm a big guy... and can take on a few ;)

Oh goody. Take mine and I'll go cook.....something other than lobster this time!

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RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 5:09:03 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

*licks lips*

quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

quote:

ORIGINAL: stanton

The more the merrier! I'm a big guy... and can take on a few ;)

Oh goody. Take mine and I'll go cook.....something other than lobster this time!

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

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RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 6:41:46 PM

puella

Posts: 2457
Joined: 12/2/2004
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lizzie,

Am I going to have to put you in a burka as well??

What's the rule for my wedding day?

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Post #: 454

RE: Getting over it - 7/24/2006 6:55:44 PM

stanton

Posts: 41
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

quote:

ORIGINAL: stanton

The more the merrier! I'm a big guy... and can take on a few ;)

Oh goody. Take mine and I'll go cook.....something other than lobster this time!

Ladies, ladies... I was joking! I am a New Englander and we call cook outs clam bakes.. LOL.. I forgot- there is another connotation. Apologies!

Please- don't start a thread about big beautiful males.

Can I come to the wedding? Please?

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Post #: 455

RE: Getting over it - 7/28/2006 10:50:15 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: girl4you2

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I never have had a relationship or saw a relationship that failed that we weren't both losers, and we both didn't need to get over ourselves, and we both weren't bitches along the way..

...personally I find men that piss and moan about their former partners to be just as flawed in themselves,., they just can't own it.

i think this would be true no matter which side of the coin you're on. it takes two to begin and two to end a relationship. there are two who lose out, and there are two who contribute to the decline, not just one. two givers, two takers, two heart breakers, two hearts broken.

I agree with most what you both are saying... However, I disagree with one point. It only takes one to make the decision to end a relationship. It really doesn't matter if one wishes to keep it going or not. If one says it's done.... there is nothing you can do to change that. Its not like you can have a relationship with me if I opt out of it at my choice. The key of making a relationship working is being reasons that a person wants to opt in.... The question then becomes... is the effort worth the result gained.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: Getting over it - 8/15/2006 6:51:14 PM

LTRsubNW

Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Caretakr

I've had past girls who thought I was an absolute bastard, for a certain attitude I had. You see,I won't punish. I don't think I should be enforcing someone keeping her word to me. And I don't feel that I should be catering to a girl atoning for HER guilt-when she childishly insists on beating herself up for screwing up.

Here's why. I won't be held responsible for someone eles's lack of emotional self control. If I cater to this nuerotic impulse, I only further reenforce it. I really hate having my time wasted by someone moping around-when there are things to be done. Get the fuck over yourself and deal with it, bitch.
And drama only encourages more.
You see,taking punishment is very catholic. There's really not a lot of consequence in avoiding the sin-if all you have to do is to pay some quick and easy penance. What I want to see happen, is work.
I can try to all the outside reenforcement in the world-and it usually won't work. The real nitty gritty and improvement comes when you force someone to take the proper personal accountability-and make them do the internal work, that corrects the attitudes and feelings that made the problems to begin wih.
Rather than slapping a bandage on the "boo boo".

(I sense coffee may be the issue)

(in reply to Caretakr)

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