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RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 7:56:08 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline 		       When I launched this thing on hot summer day, I was hoping it would start some good conversation.  It fizzled, but I hoped it might have a better chance on a cold winters night. 

     It seems a lot of people want complain about a lack of good topics, but then they turn what could be one into crap.

     

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:00:03 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

Anyone ever notice how many people scream"search button search button" when people post a topic?

I don't do this, but I do get sick of certain threads that cause flamewars repeatedly... like "what is the difference between a submissive and a slave?"

pppsssssttttt Anyone wanna double dare me to start a Submissive V. Slave thread? Seeing as I have been here long enough to know better it could be fun

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:08:21 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		I double dog triple spank dare ya!

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:15:29 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		I'm a self professed hermit and I don't like public groups of any sort (regardless of the subject matter.) No matter how much a subject interests me, I'm just a loner at heart.

It's a definate pattern to my life. I have many hobbies which could be enjoyed in a group setting and I choose not to. I am simply not a social person and not comfortable around other human beings most of the time.

So for me, the "local community" is way down on the bottom of my priority list.

ETA: It's also a matter of time. I work at night and spend weekends at horse shows...doesn't leave much time for anything else.


< Message edited by GeekyGirl -- 2/17/2007 8:19:10 PM >

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:42:32 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		This weeks agenda: Make Geeky girl a poly social butterfly. 

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:47:14 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline 		      How often we make it out to events as a couple has fallen even lower.  I didn't even realize we had missed this months Munch because of a family situation until I wrongly thought we were going to miss it for a work function the following Sat.  We've met some incredible people and formed great friendships though.  The kind of friends who show up on moving day, and those are worth something.

    

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 8:56:04 PM   
ArgoGeorgia


Posts: 256
Joined: 2/9/2007
From: Atlanta, Georgia
Status: offline 		I would say it would go 1) Family 2) Me 3)Job 4)Everyone else.  #2 has to be me.  Yeah, maybe I'm a selfish bastard, but you gotta look out for yourself, ya know?  Sometimes BDSM falls in with 'Me', and sometimes it is in with everyone else.  Now, if I could only find a way to make it part of #3, life would be sweet!

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/17/2007 9:50:45 PM   
LadyHugs


Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Dear WyrdRich, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
My personal priorities are 1. Family, 2. Slave(s) 3. Myself 4. M/s,D/s,
BDSM and S&M community.  I'm retired so, I can afford a shift of priorities.
 
That said, there can be a great many causes for a lack of sleep.  My mind sometimes works in creative ways, gives me my next sadistic scene for a hard core masochist I TOP occassionally; sometimes concerns for who I care for as a care giver/provider having to take care of administrative, financial, medical issues, etc., and sometimes I cannot sleep as I am worried about someone and their troubles.  It can also be pain that won't let me sleep.  Unfortunately, I'm a very light sleeper, as even a movement of air can wake me.
 
One just has to do what they can to take care of themself and get the rest they need, even if it requires naps.
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to WyrdRich)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 12:23:19 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WyrdRich

What priority do you give to the R/T community? 


About as much as I give to any other sort of entertainment. I'd rather go to a munch than a movie (unless it's a Harry Potter movie!) and I'd rather go to a public play party than a munch.  Entertainment is something that comes after business is taken care of whether that's work, doctors appointments, holiday celebrations with family etc. Most of the munches that Himself and I attend are pre-planned (by me) in advance and we do schedule other things around them if we can, but if something comes up which is more important (sudden illness, work emergencies etc) then the munch is cancelled and rescheduled.

quote:

Whether your BDSM is 24/7 or third Tuesdays from 8-11 pm, how big a part of your life is your local group? 


Since most of the same people who attend our munches are also good friends, they're pretty important and are high up on the list. Even when we're not 'doing' something like a movie or what have you, just hanging around with them and gabbing is always a blast and I'd miss them if we didn't get to have them in our lives.

quote:

There are a percentage among us who make WIITWD the center of their universe.  Among them, I see a lot of similarities to people who go to church 5 nights a week or hardcore political activists of any stripe.  This is what they ARE as opposed to something they do.  I can, and do, respect their right to make those choices but sometimes I feel like we are living on different planets when it comes to basic values.  How do you handle this, or if you felt slightly insulted by this paragraph,


I'm not insulted at all but then I don't get what it is that you're saying here. ::laughs:: M/s permeates every facet of my life, that never changes but, hell, life is life, shit happens and just because I may be dealing with an emergency of some sort, that doesn't mean I'm not still owned by Michael, still his slave and still retain the focus and mindset he would have me retain. (Not sure that answers the question, but it's what came out of my brain and seeped into my fingers as I was typing!)

quote:

how do you feel about people like me who don't contribute as much?


I think you should contribute as much to your local group as you desire to do from your heart. When it comes from the heart, it's always good. :)

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to WyrdRich)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 6:18:17 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		my work has kept me away from munches for two years.  i go to events that interest me if they are held on weekends.  i don't have a "community" life at all and not sure it's something i want to have since i don't really fit into the "community" at all.

_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to WyrdRich)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 6:24:35 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I've attended two munches, two different groups of people.  Because of those experiences, I can safely say that I will probably never attend another lifestyle event.  One munch was made up of a group that had physically been with each other, in various formations (that's just not what I am into), the second was indulging in behavior that I considered tacky for a vanilla, public meeting place.  

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 12:13:55 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		(fast reply)

We don't belong to any local groups, Hubby likes to keep this part of our life private.  The only time i lose sleep is when He wants a late play session or when i have an early tee time.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 12:17:35 PM   
SDFemDom4cuck


Posts: 2809
Joined: 5/23/2005
From: P'burgh PA
Status: offline
quote:

the second was indulging in behavior that I considered tacky for a vanilla, public meeting place. 


Have to agree with you on that one. The first one I attended locally was at a "family" type restaurant. Leather/pleather everywhere, whips, floggers, cuffs hanging from belts. Surrounded by nilla families with small children. Several of which moved or quickly finished and left. I was a bit stunned. Tried a 2nd one thinking it was a fluke. Same situation. Here's this table of 20+ of us (already pretty attention getting) and then several in full dress. Perhaps I'm just west coast unaware but I had never seen anything like it on the east coast personally when attending munches/meets. I apologize if I sound judgemental or up on a high horse, I'm just cranky today.

On topic...Priorities and life changes recently have left far less time for play than I would like. Or for anything much fun at all, play or not. Between school, study, work there's barely time to sleep let alone attend any events or even play. I tend to have CM up in the background while doing classwork so I tend to be hanging around on the forums a bit more than before because of popping in and out to check what's going on where to take a break from reading or research.

Kind of glad this thread came back into play. Friends both D/s and nilla have been complaining about my being a hermit for the past few months since going back to school. I used to be the person that set up and arranged the group activities like a weekly singles dinner and an American Idol viewing dinner. A D/s discussion group every 2 weeks. Suddenly I'm not able to do all that and do everything else I need to do as well...leaving me with feeling torn in too many different directions. Then after reading this I'm realizing the person that I've been leaving out of the equation of priorities entirely lately has been "me".

I appreciated this thread popping back up Rich. Thought provoking and well needed bit of insight was gained. Thanks.



_____________________________

Ms Jo

She dealt her pretty words like Blades -
How glittering they shone -
And every One unbared a Nerve
Or wantoned with a Bone -

I want a sensitive man - one who'll cry when I hit him.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 12:54:25 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline 		      Thank you for your reply, LadyHugs.  Naps have become a part of my routine since this launched.

    Another thing that has changed, is in my appreciation for those who are much more committed to the community than I am.  The willingness to welcome new people, challenge and expand their horizons, and tolerate pains in the ass like myself is awesome.  I like to think that around some bend in the road ahead, I'll be able to offer more, and pass along what I've learned.

(in reply to LadyHugs)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:01:20 PM   
WildnWicked


Posts: 50
Joined: 2/26/2004
From: Lancaster, California
Status: offline 		I am really glad you brought this thread back up. *s* And no worries that there was any offense taken. I respect your views and can appreciate that you live differently than me, but travel in some of the same circles. Neither of us are better or more "twu" than the other. We have taken different paths and both are equally valid and respected.

For those who have yet to meet a "zealot" let me introduce myself. lol

I will clarify something first. Leather is who I am & BDSM is what I am into. Meaning, I live within the Leather Community and on occasion engage in BDSM activities. The majority of my friends and family (including bio family) are in the Leather Community. I don't see WIITWD as a form of entertainment, rather a lifestyle that is rich in history, traditions and culture.

Did you know that when the AIDS epidemic first hit, the Leather Community was the FIRST to jump in and hold a fundraiser? And, if my facts are correct same goes for Katrina. Some Leather organizations have raise millions to help various causes.

Did you know that the Stonewall Riots were not only started by the Trans Community, but the Leather Community, too? (why here is such a division between the two now really bothers me..but that is a different topic)

Now it is my turn to ask that people understand that the following is NOT intended to set myself or others apart or above the rest. We all serve different purposes and this is my view of the role I play.

If not for those who immerse their life into WIITWD where would the groups, organizations and legal representation be? The events, playparties, dungeons, munches, and various other forms of what some call ‘entertainment’ would be very limited if existent at all. I am called to be a part of the ‘machine’ if you will. I believe in the fight for sexual freedom and not only believe in it, I feel a deep need to be a part of that fight.

There is a war being waged that not only affects the gay community, but the Leather community as well. Having been around both communities growing up, I can’t ignore or be passive about what is going on.

Although I identify as a Top, I feel a need to serve this community. I don’t begrudge those who play or socialize when it suits them. I find some level of peace and reward that you CAN do that. Just maybe it is because of the work that those before me, those standing with me, and those who will stand in the future, have done to ensure that it is possible.

I do have a family and a job. Thankfully I am in a position that both of those areas of my life are conducive to the activism work that I engage in.

I do live this lifestyle moreso in the social & activism end than in the play aspects. I find it to be rewarding and fulfilling. And the group? It is my heart and soul. I believe in what it is that we are and are striving to do. I believe in it enough to fight to keep it going and endure the emotional rollercoaster it has been the last three and a half years. The payoff is things like celebrating wedding anniversaries of my friends who met in the group. And somehow finding a way to bring people together in a lifestyle unfriendly area, so we don't feel so alone.

_____________________________

We live in a society of victimization, where people are much more comfortable being victimized than actually standing up for themselves.-- Marilyn Manson

(in reply to SDFemDom4cuck)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:08:36 PM   
WildnWicked


Posts: 50
Joined: 2/26/2004
From: Lancaster, California
Status: offline 		Passion is something we all feel. How and where we express it is as individual as the person.

Some a passionate about spaying and neutering animals.. Bob Eubanks is a zealot in that area.
Some are PETA people (hard to find a PETA Leatherman...lol)
Some save whales
Some feed the homeless
Some are Veteran's Rights Activists

I have lots of passions. The Leather Community is just one. I think sometimes those in my life only get to see my Leather activities because I don't know if they want to know about my other interests. *shrugs*



_____________________________

We live in a society of victimization, where people are much more comfortable being victimized than actually standing up for themselves.-- Marilyn Manson

(in reply to WildnWicked)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:31:15 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

This weeks agenda: Make Geeky girl a poly social butterfly. 


Naughty troll! Back under the bridge you go!



(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:32:08 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		Would that be the bridge of your hips?

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:36:13 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		*gasp*  I think our resident troll might be a pervert!

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Losing Sleep - 2/18/2007 1:37:27 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		Hmmm... methinks you have been spending way too much money on the psychic hotline. You could have just sent me the money and I would have told you strait up.

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 40
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