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Need some advice - 9/20/2016 10:22:32 PM

Jds86

Posts: 2
Joined: 9/8/2016
Status: offline

I was just wondering if someone can take a look at my profile, and give me some feedback on it. I'm not the best at writing profiles, and wanting to know if there is anything i should add, or take away from it. Thanks in advance :)

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Post #: 1

RE: Need some advice - 9/20/2016 10:27:15 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14414
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

Over all, I think it's good. I would take out the stuff at the end about the nudes, etc. Keep it positive. The only other thing would be to put a little bit in about your philosophies on D/s and what your seek in a power dynamic...without getting to far into the kink.

Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Jds86)

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RE: Need some advice - 9/21/2016 2:10:23 AM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

I agree with Oside and I would take out the stuff about hating drama. Nice photo..maybe add one or two more.

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"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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RE: Need some advice - 9/21/2016 2:44:00 AM

SDFemDom4cuck

Posts: 2809
Joined: 5/23/2005
From: P'burgh PA
Status: offline

Personal contact information is not allowed on your profile per TOS so you might want to remove that first thing. I would also suggest breaking up into paragraphs, a wall of text bunched all together is hard to read. A nice mix of Vanilla interests and kink on your preferences list is always good. It gives someone approaching you an ice breaker of sorts without focusing on a specific kink. Otherwise, a nice profile.

_____________________________

Ms Jo

She dealt her pretty words like Blades -
How glittering they shone -
And every One unbared a Nerve
Or wantoned with a Bone -

I want a sensitive man - one who'll cry when I hit him.

(in reply to Jds86)

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RE: Need some advice - 9/21/2016 2:46:04 AM

NookieNotes

Posts: 1720
Joined: 11/10/2013
Status: offline

1. Put blank lines between paragraphs. Will make it easier to read.

2. Agreed, take out the line about drama. No negativity. Find a way to keep it positive.

3. Take this out:

quote:

I'm not sure what else to say at this point. I don't want to give it all away then what would we talk about lol. I know it's on just about every profile on here, but I'm not a creep or anything. I'm not on here to get nudes, or have some weird agenda.

It reads like you are unsure and not confident. Be sure and confident. You are a dominant.

I agree about adding some words about what kind of dominant you are, and adding more photos. I don't suggest a cock shot at all.

Good luck!

_____________________________

Nookie
--
https://datingkinky.com

I Write! A few of my books on Amazon: http://amazon.com/author/msnnotes

(in reply to BitaTruble)

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Post #: 5

RE: Need some advice - 9/21/2016 5:21:56 PM

Jds86

Posts: 2
Joined: 9/8/2016
Status: offline

Thanks alot for the pointers. Some really great points I dident think about.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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Post #: 6

RE: Need some advice - 9/21/2016 9:47:24 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

Fella, I've been reviewing profiles for over a decade, and yours is damn good.

Your writing style shows you to be direct and not very complicated. You have two general paragraphs about kinky you, then a paragraph about vanilla you.

Your pic again shows you as down to earth, with the cap and a dog. Your last paragraph implies that your daughter means a lot to you.

The impression I get is of a solid guy, who relationships mean a lot to.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Jds86)

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Post #: 7