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congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 12:55:12 PM   
LordBennett


Posts: 24
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		  Do subs/slaves see something wrong with a master or dominant writing them and telling them congratulations when they have just found their one or wishing them good luck in their search?
  I think it is nothing more than being polite and acknowledging their status and desires.  As a result I will do it.  I seldom get a reply but I do not expect one. 
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 12:57:54 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I see nothing inherently wrong in it but you must realize that in the case of an owned sub that it may be considered rude and trolling to contact her for any reason.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 1:00:35 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I do the same thing. I often congratulate boys I see who postt hat they are owned or collared, especially ones whom I have talked to in the past. I always thought it was polite. But then again I do the same for Masters and Mistress announcing they ahve collered their perfect pets and whatnot.
As for wishing luck, I do that for everyone.
How could it be considered offensive, if you dont want people to be happy for you, then dont post that youve found what your looking for. Maybe thats just my opinion...

DV



(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 2:59:54 PM   
diamonddreamlove


Posts: 770
Joined: 5/19/2006
Status: offline 		I think it is wonderful that anyone would take the time and effort (even small effort) to congratulate anyone on finding their O/one.  It is a time for happiness and good feelings i believe.

_____________________________

"Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much." Robert Greenleaf

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 3:04:50 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		When you're talking about online, and someone you've never talked with before- it's considered a type of trolling or "attempt to see if her profile is really what it says it is and see if I can get a foot in the door."

If it's offline and she's announced it to you, or if you're already friends- then it's considered the generic polite response.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 3:13:47 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		I -detest- when someone writes me to wish me "good luck" on my search for my "One" or to wish me congradulations on finding my "One". I hate it because my profile is very clear that my Owner and I have been together quite some time, and I'm not looking for another serious relationship partner

I've never had someone write a message like this that actually corespondaned to my profile. It always is written as though I'd just met my Owner, or was still looking for one.

Granted, that's a pretty...jaded...perspective.


_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/23/2006 4:15:40 PM   
becca4020


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/18/2006
Status: offline 		i just joined the site last week, and i received a letter from a Dom yesterday that asked why i am here if i am already owned (as i stated in my profile)!!! i replied that i am here to learn, since although i have long been a sub, being a slave is a totally new experience and i need to read posts and post my own questions in order to figure out some things.  He acted as if this place were just some sort of glorified pick-up bar (grr... probably should not have replied at all).

-becca

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 5:18:43 AM   
gentlethistle


Posts: 186
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline 		No, I don't see anything wrong with it.  If it is appropriate, polite and responds genuinely to an 'announcement' in a sub's profile or journal.  I would likely respond to such a message with a 'thank you'.  Obviously, it's possible that the person who had contacted me was just 'trawling' and I wouldn't continue with the conversation if we didn't seem to have any common ground.

Laura

(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 5:26:52 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		I can see both points of view here.  I posted on the fourm when i was collared and i got many congrats (and i thank all for that).  This ia a public fourm.  If someone emaild me it would bother me a bit unless it was someone who i talk to before.  If a total stranger mailed me well nice of them but i would reather they don't.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to gentlethistle)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 6:52:37 AM   
Mavis


Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline 		i have written a Dom i was talking to when i found out He had selected a submissive.  i said something to the effect of, " i heard You have found Your partner, and i wanted to say congrats..." 

His response was "Who the hell told you I found my one?  Hell, she's just a play partner,  she seems to think she has collared ME, which would happen over my dead body.."   OMg.  lol.   she stopped being a play partner shortly after, and i have always felt guilty about that,  they might have gone on to a fuller relationship if He didn't get a heads up she was claiming a deeper relationship than He was seeing there.  There was obviously a mis-communication between them, or some misunderstanding about the nature of their relationship, but i wish the alert on that hadn't come thru ME.  damn.  Now, i don't make any congrats or best wishes on the claims of one partner absent the similar claims by the other partner.

While we're on the topic,   in the old days, it was customary to "congratulate" the groom on winning his intended, as if he'd won the hunt, and she was the prize.   The bride was given "blessings or best wishes" instead of congrats, because congrats implied she had laid a trap and drug home her prize, as if she wasn't appealing enough to have won his heart, but had to snare him unaware. 

i still follow that rule when i hear of collarings and pairings, congrats to the dominant, male or female, and best wishes to the submissive, male or female.  Since i get confused when two switches come together for a long term commitment, i just say "party on".  (Ok, that was completely a joke!   i just follow my instincts with SW/SW joinings.)

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 7:08:36 AM   
LL1aintbehavin


Posts: 104
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline 		LordBennett.
i have been contacted many times, congradulating me on being collared and obviously happy with my One.  i have responded to A/all of them and thanked them for their well wishes.  This moring i got a congratulations on O/our recent marriage, to which i responded with another thank you.
i think it is nice when a nice message is sent through from someone happy for anothers success in this lifestyle.
Too often W/we are apt to jump on it as an attempt at trolling or fishing, when sometimes we should just say thank you for the nice thought.
i prefer to see the best side of people, until shown otherwise.
aintbehavin

(in reply to Mavis)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 7:15:56 AM   
nstyslave


Posts: 34
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline 		i personally do not see anything wrong with a polite congratulations, After all, the ownership is assumably publicly shared, therefore on the surface i do not think that a mere "congratulations," is too far out there. However, there is an "unseen line" amongst Doms, no matter if They know each Other or not, and Most Doms/Masters, will not cross that line with an owned slave (especially with a sub/slave that He does not know to begin with) because sometimes it is indeed seen as trolling. Also, the reason that some may not reply, might be because their Master has instructed them not too. Simply my thoughts...

~nsty

_____________________________

Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.

(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 7:34:40 AM   
trippingdaisy


Posts: 113
Joined: 6/3/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		i've received several messages on here, only two or three of which has been a solicitation for something. The other messages consisted of someone seeking advice on needle play, and the rest were congratulatory notes on my relastionship with my Master. i don't find anything wrong with that at all...in fact, i thought it was very sweet. i'd send thank you notes back, and that was that.




_____________________________

Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.

(in reply to LordBennett)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 8:26:34 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mavis


OMg.  lol.   she stopped being a play partner shortly after, and i have always felt guilty about that,  they might have gone on to a fuller relationship if He didn't get a heads up she was claiming a deeper relationship than He was seeing there.  There was obviously a mis-communication between them, or some misunderstanding about the nature of their relationship, but i wish the alert on that hadn't come thru ME.  damn.  Now, i don't make any congrats or best wishes on the claims of one partner absent the similar claims by the other partner.



I would not feel guilty about it. If he was that into her he wouldn't have dumped her because of a misunderstanding, and he wouldn't have considered her just a play partner either. Either he is into you or he isn't, and telling others that he is isn't gong to make it so...ouch! Feel happy you set her free to find someone who was really into her, it is such a better place to be..smiles.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Mavis)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: congratulations and good luck - 7/24/2006 8:55:49 AM   
Mavis


Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline 		Julie, you know, that's a really good point.  i think she's still missing him,  but at least she isn't tied to a Dom who won't even claim her, how sad that would be if it continued!  Thank you for perspective tip.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 15
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