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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/24/2016 11:19:42 PM   
Taramafor


Posts: 39
Joined: 12/22/2016
From: UK, Manchester
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

quote:

He creates a place for us to be our truest selves.


yeah. I can agree with that. Do you think that works with what I said, I think it does. He creates that safe place by taking the responsibility of our desires off of us, and placing them on himself. You're as responsible as each other in that regard, I think.

Or do you see it different?


I wouldn't see it as responsibility as such myself. It's more like you can just be the you that you are. The you that you can only be with that person. In that place. At that time. It' not just him that creates it either, for without you there as well there is no "place". You make it together.

I don't buy into spirits and eternal beings and all that but there's one thing I agree with tamaka on. There's only one "shared you". The two of you that only you will know as each other and that no others can. Every time you're with each other. You don't need to experience a "heightened state of being" to enjoy the best of each other.

As for the animals/risk thing, a lot of wild animals ARE safe. As long as you don't do something stupid with them as you would with people. Basically treat them with the respect you would with a person (in their own language of course) and you're safe. Just don't make sudden moves and all that. Pretend you're in a gangsta neighborhood or something. Be very aware of any "wrong moves" at first. Wild wolves are pretty safe and even great white sharks will only swim around you some unless you're bleeding or have a harm strapped to your leg or bonk them on the nose. Know the risks though, that's always a given. Sometimes you need to be scratched an bitten a bit before being accepted/respected too. Probably a bad idea with great whites. Tends to go better with wolves. Need to know when not to struggle too though. Basically if they got you in jaw lock you better be a statue. That's why wild animals get a bad rep about being dangerous. because people flail and make them panic to make them a danger. That's a person fault IMO. Not the fault of the animal that reacts due to fear. I've heard of cases where people get themselves killed with bears by banging frying pans together if you can believe that. Did they honesty think that would help?

If you see a person with a gun standing outside your tent then what do you do? Me, I remain calm and don't make sudden movements or loud noise. Respect the wild, be it gangster neighborhoods or animals, and it tends to respect back. And I've earned the respect of both. No joke, the person had a gun. Parted in peace. I get on with animals too. Wild and not. O.O

Say, that's like a dom/sub thing in that light. With the respect the wild/gangster example. Letting them be in control and getting on because you let yourself follow their lead or something. Hmm...

< Message edited by Taramafor -- 12/24/2016 11:43:21 PM >

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)
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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/25/2016 7:42:25 AM   
littleclip


Posts: 869
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my Domme makes a safe place for me to trust her and open myself up, and in the doing builds me up stronger and more resilient.

_____________________________

currently owned by LadyAthena15805
i will always come to the call of those i love


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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/25/2016 9:45:21 AM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
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ThatDizzyChick your first thread I never noticed this, more please.
The last dominant I was with, prodomme - an odd occupation (shrugs didnt bother me), I shagged that one clean across the living room floor till the wall stopped us...yes we got entangled under the coffee table for a wee bity...then i finished that one of on the kitchen table ( the only person who has been ravished atop it- I reserve it for utter rarity)
Cream cakes we took turns - no actual cakes as rules are rules
My mum to hospital - together
(2 opposite examples of persons/peoples/soul) No that you can ever save anyone frm the spiral of woe

Incidentally two dominants can be together because two people can be together if you are lucky enough to find that one special other.

What makes the other special is somewhat more difficult to answer, we for me anyway.




(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)
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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/25/2016 10:33:35 AM   
ThatDizzyChick


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quote:

There's only one "shared you".

I like that idea, a shared me.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/25/2016 10:34:40 AM   
ThatDizzyChick


Posts: 5490
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quote:

What makes the other special is somewhat more difficult to answer, we for me anyway.

For me as well, and I suspect that we will be in the majority.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/25/2016 11:56:04 AM   
Taramafor


Posts: 39
Joined: 12/22/2016
From: UK, Manchester
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

quote:

There's only one "shared you".

I like that idea, a shared me.


Mm. Only one of everyone. Therefor only one of you and whoever you interact with. No one else has your "shared" experiences. If the whole world says otherwise then you can say to yourselves "They don't know what we know about each other and what we been through". Honestly, sometimes I have to remind myself of that to remind myself others I know are the ones that matter and that strangers that act like they know better can go suck a rotten egg.

Yuck. Rotten eggs. Welp, it's christmas day now. ROTTEN EGGS FOR EVERYONE!

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RE: What Dominants do for me - 12/27/2016 7:54:33 AM   
ChironSub


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Joined: 12/26/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

What I enjoy is completely losing control my body to someone. I love feeling helpless. I love a dominant who can seriously play with my body like an instrument he is really good at and manipulate it to react at his will, in a way like wrestling of my body away from me.

So actually although I have never experienced this before, but if a dominant could make me cum from verbal commands, I think that would be amazing. But clearly it takes training and haven't really had one who is committed to work it to that stage.

As for the psychological side of it. I just like being second in command to somebody who i admire and respect and adore. I hate leading. I want someone to lead in our family nucleus. And I want to be his most valuable assistant.

But if I rationalise everything. I was never safe by the ones who were suppose to protect me and lead me. Aka my parents. They were my abusers.

So for me, it's extremely intoxicating to be able feel safe with someone on the level, where I can be completely helpless and under his control, and knowing he would never harm me.

I boil everything down to a need to feel completely safe with someone.

I cannot experience this with a vanilla, because, I need the person to have dark needs and to be able to regulate and control his own dark needs to not harm me with it.

It's like, I love the feeling of feeling safe with a wild full grown tiger or lion. Knowing it is dangerous but it won't eat me up. And honestly, I will probably be one of those idiots who think wild animals are safe. And won't be surprise if that's how I die some day. If I disappeared from this forum, and ya see in the news Chinese girl got eaten up by some wild animals. That's probably me.

Because that's one of my biggest fantasies. Not to be eaten by a wild tiger or lion, but to be able to interact and touch a wild tiger or lion and not get eaten up. But to make that dream come true. Comes with huge risks.

BUT I will probably be eaten or killed in the process. But also, I am totally unafraid and reckless like that, even with dogs, when they are viscious growling and barking at me, I move forward and touch them, I put my hands through people's gates to touch their hostile huge guard dogs, whenever I am in the mountains, any wild animal I see, I walk towards them, and try to touch them. Most of the time, they will run away. I will never blame the animal. If they reject me, they reject me. I understand and I know the risks.

There is this venomous snake who's venom could kill you in 1.5 hours that I saw in my hikes, that was jumping and hissing at me. I just walked towards it, and got closer and closer, talking to it and it got more and more piss off at me. In the end, it just slithered away. And my friends think I am fucking crazy. But that's me. I rather die by an animal than by disease.



You articulated a lot of what I am seeking in a Dom.

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: What Dominants do for me - 1/18/2017 5:21:38 PM   
LTE


Posts: 461
Joined: 1/17/2017
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tamaka


quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

OK, my first serious thread.... be gentle (fuck that i am a masochist, rip into me as hard as you can ..make it hurt baby!!!)
OK so over on the other site there was a discussion where I talked about the way I revealed my deepest thoughts, fantasies and insecurities to my fellas (not all at once, it is an ongoing process). And it got me thinking about what the Fella said about how he viewed being dominant (which I posted in the pain thread). And i started thinking about how i could boil down what a dominant does for me, why i need one, into a simple statement, and this is what I came up with.

He takes my shit off my chest and puts it on his shoulders.

Thoughts?



He creates a place for us to be our truest selves.



*wink*

(in reply to tamaka)
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RE: What Dominants do for me - 1/18/2017 5:34:30 PM   
LTE


Posts: 461
Joined: 1/17/2017
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

Pshaw and like snuggling is not majorly important!
Actually that is one thing I have fround almost every guy who claims to be dom needs to learn, that snuggling doesn't make you weak.


Great comment. A Dom does not claim anything, they are confident in themselves and they do snuggle when in relationships much more than they inflict pain or launch you into subspace. Perhaps it would be proper to call it snugglespace.

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RE: What Dominants do for me - 1/18/2017 6:55:29 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14409
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTE


quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

Pshaw and like snuggling is not majorly important!
Actually that is one thing I have fround almost every guy who claims to be dom needs to learn, that snuggling doesn't make you weak.


Great comment. A Dom does not claim anything, they are confident in themselves and they do snuggle when in relationships much more than they inflict pain or launch you into subspace. Perhaps it would be proper to call it snugglespace.

You're talking about two different things. BDSM is Bondage, Discipline, Sado-Masochism. It's essentially kink. D/s is Dominance and submission. You can engage in BDSM and never engage in D/s. You can engage in D/s without engaging in BDSM. SO, assuming that all Doms engage in pain play or sub space is incorrect.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: What Dominants do for me - 2/7/2017 6:41:04 AM   
asub2b4u


Posts: 17
Joined: 1/3/2013
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for me it is simply...

Master achieves Nirvana through me

prior Master's words not mine...don't wanna get attacked here : )

s

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: What Dominants do for me - 3/13/2017 9:44:31 PM   
tysamson


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/1/2012
Status: offline
Hello Greta:

I have never in my 50+ years as a Dominant person ever heard a more apt and excellent description of what a D/s relationship is
and should be. I mean, I hate being categorized as a snake, but that is the truth of the matter. I am both very dangerous and
also the creator of a safe space where you can pet a wild, large, scary, hungry fucking tiger without being eaten alive. That is
precisely how I view things from my side. Luckily, I really care for the people in my circle and wish for them the fulfillment of
dreams as my dreams have been fulfilled. I actually want to be petted as the ferocious tiger that I am. Thank you for the excellent
metaphor. You rock!

Master Tyler

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 32
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