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i need advice - 6/16/2017 5:15:59 AM   
maringloria69


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Joined: 10/15/2014
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I have a question or comment. I have been serving a couple for almost 3 years. within the last 3 months mistress has allowed my family members to see me nude. It was never one of my limits but we had talked about it. I am not comfortable with it. The damage has been done. I have been in a bad mood. not sure if i should continue with them. i have mix feelings.
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RE: i need advice - 6/16/2017 7:17:53 AM   
WindAndSky


Posts: 26
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First off, I get that you want varying opinions, but posting the same question in more than one forum is not allowed. Most people read more than one forum, you'll typically get the same variety of opinions if you only post once.

As to your actual question - without knowing the circumstance, it's tough to give advice. You said your family members. Like, your mom? Your brother? Your kids? Was there exposure to actual kink, or just nudity? What do you mean, she "allowed" it? Were they brought into the room while you were nude, without your knowledge? Were you ordered to walk through the living room nude while they were there?

The first thing you should do is talk to them. Ask why they did something you had said you were uncomfortable with, and why it was this particular thing. If they wanted to push boundaries, surely there were others available. Let them know that as of this moment, it's a limit, clearly it's affecting you. Their response to you laying down a new limit may be telling.

I'm going to assume that it's your child-aged kids, and that it was just nudity, not actual kink (that they could see). I'm a little biased, my slut and I have a very open, body positive household, and his kid have seen us both in various stages of undress, frequently. They know about appropriate and inappropriate times for nudity, and that casual nudity should be confined to private family time. They have NEVER seen overt kink, nude or clothed, and ideally never will. Kids only think something is abnormal if we tell them (or show them) that it is. Some households are never nude around each other at all, and that's ok too, it's just a different normal. But it's likely that your kids aren't scarred for life, and them seeing you nude doesn't make you a bad mother.

But it is time to have a much more specific conversation, probably linked in with the one I suggested above, about what you will allow your family to be exposed to. How you want to raise your kids, and what role your dominants are allowed to have in that raising. For many submissives, even most submissives, certain things are off limits to domination. Family and job are two of the most common. But everyone, submissive switch or dominant, needs to be up front about that need.

Good luck. It sounds like you're having trouble getting past this, and I can understand why. I hope you give them a chance to explain, and I very much hope that they listen to you, apologize, and accept this as a limit going forward.

(in reply to maringloria69)
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RE: i need advice - 6/17/2017 12:53:23 AM   
maringloria69


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Joined: 10/15/2014
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sorry. i posted here also since time was passing and no reply on the other forum. I did talk and mistress said I should be proud to serve. To give you an example of what I am referring too. She arranged for me to get a pelvic exam. She had my father come and stay during the examination. It was a real doctor, and he was professional. nothing sexual or kinky, just my exposure.

(in reply to WindAndSky)
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RE: i need advice - 6/17/2017 6:49:31 AM   
shiftyw


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From: The Shire
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That'd be super off limits for me. I'd stop serving them for sure. A) why aren't you arranging your own pelvic exams? B) why did your father do what she said? And why did he choose to stay in the rooom? Did you protest this (I would've, fuck serving)? C) leave them.

_____________________________

"Can I just say that we don't have a clique problem at this school? And some of us shouldn't have to take this workshop, because some of us are just victims in this situation."

(in reply to maringloria69)
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RE: i need advice - 6/17/2017 6:09:02 PM   
kiwisub22


Posts: 450
Joined: 7/16/2016
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My dom upfront stated that he would never interfere with my work, my kids or my family and vanilla friends.

Sorry, but I would never have allowed this situation. Yes, I said "allowed". I might be submissive but I would not ALLOW my kink to intrude into my vanilla life. And if I found that my dom was getting off on this situation, they would be my late dom. The vanilla aspect of my life is not up for consideration - I have responsibilities that kink can't cover. Including a mortgage, and kids that don't deserve to have my sexuality thrust in their faces. OP, just because you have affection/love for someone doesn't mean that they are good for you, and just because you love them, doesn't mean that you have to stay with them.

I think the first thing you need to do is talk to your dom and share your feelings about the situation. And if this is too hard, then you have a completely different problem to think about.

(in reply to shiftyw)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 11:36:53 AM   
CelticPrince


Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
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maringglory,

The last two comments were right on the money. It is ok to place a post of this nature on ask a Master as I believe you would get a more objective view of the problem
You Mistress was abusing her power by doing what she did; and I also am puzzled as to why your father opted to viewing the examination.

I believe there is more dynamics going on here than has been stated.

CP

(in reply to maringloria69)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 11:48:37 AM   
maringloria69


Posts: 8
Joined: 10/15/2014
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He did not know that would happen. He was told doctor was just getting my vitals and wanted a better family history . He told me he was sorry he stayed but doctor kept talking and he did not want to be rude.

(in reply to CelticPrince)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 12:38:08 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32561
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And, at what point during taking your vitals did your clothes jump off?

(Anybody else here get pelvic exams/pap smears with their father in the room? No?)

What the flying fuck is wrong with you?





_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to maringloria69)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 3:47:32 PM   
shiftyw


Posts: 2831
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From: The Shire
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But also how old are you? Why did your doctor let this happen? It breaks a bunch of hippa laws from my estimation. Get a new doctor too.

Also I'm now inclined to think you're just a dude hoping for wank material.

_____________________________

"Can I just say that we don't have a clique problem at this school? And some of us shouldn't have to take this workshop, because some of us are just victims in this situation."

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 4:57:02 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9361
Joined: 11/4/2015
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Op is a man talking pants - you all know that right?

what one is the drug doctor again? and half dozen mushrooms please

_____________________________

wE arE tHe voiCes,
We SAtuRaTe yOur aLPHA brain WAveS, ThIs is nOt A DrEAm The wiZaRd of Oz, shoES, CaLcuLUs, DECorAtiNG, FrIDGE SProcKeTs, be VeRy sCareDed – SLoBbers,We DeEManDErs Sloowee DAnCiNG, SmOOches – whisper whisper & CaAkEE

(in reply to shiftyw)
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RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 5:34:01 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32561
Status: offline
Yeah, but it's more fun to do it this way.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: i need advice - 6/18/2017 8:44:08 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
*It was never one of my limits but we had talked about it.*

What does "talked about it" signify? And if it wasn't one of your limits, why are you acting like it was?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 2:33:11 AM   
maringloria69


Posts: 8
Joined: 10/15/2014
Status: offline
As Per comment by shiwftyw, Sorry But Doctor must allow any person the patient wishes. It be your husband, bf, mother etc. The only ones not allowed are males under the age of 18. Even teen girls are allowed during a pelvic exam. If patient does not have anyone then doctor will normally prefer a nurse to be present. Surprised you did not know this being a woman

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 3:47:06 AM   
kkaliforniaa


Posts: 256
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline
While I'm not a doctor or lawyer, I do agree with marin's comment about anyone the patient wants in the room is allowed [excluding minors]. I've looked into this before and many doctor's offices "don't allow" anyone else to be in the room during the exam, my question is what are they trying to hide? Many women don't feel comfortable spreading their legs for anyone they're not intimate with, so allowing a partner in the room can actually be beneficial to the exam. Add to the equation why are parents allowed in the room when a teen has their first exam, yet when you're "80" years old you're not allowed to have your sister, you're best friend, etc.. Back on point, if you want someone in the room with you [for whatever reason], if your "guests" [within reason, twenty people seems a bit much] aren't allowed, you can take your business elsewhere.

As for the other stuff, I agree with LadyPact,
quote:

And, at what point during taking your vitals did your clothes jump off?

I don't go to the doctor often, but generally questions and vitals are asked first, then you're asked to disrobe for the physical examination. This is just too confusing. Why didn't you bring it up to your father that you were going to be getting naked? You feel like crap, imagine how your father feels [unless he's pervy and secretly wanted to see you naked, but that's a whole other boat].

I'm looking at marin's profile, there are many entries and there are two options, 1. like many have questioned, she's actually a guy looking to wank off 2. she is involved with some very twisted people [or possibly something along the lines of kink.com's The Upper Floor or Public Disgrace] and her family is full of perverse people [although, as WindandSky commented, nudity shouldn't be something to be ashamed of, so the exam thing could be a 50/50 area. If the family isn't full of nudists, I would question their motives. BUT like with marin's father, were they fully informed prior to the exam what would be happening, if not, it is wrong to place blame on them. If I HAD to be in the same room, I would at the very least face the opposite wall. marin hasn't mentioned what her family did during these exams, only that they were there]..

Reading more of marin's journal, apparently the couple she has submitted to BREED her [sex parties with six people of one race], THEN put the baby up for adoption! [this is really pushing boundaries of legal/illegal, moral/immoral, BDSM/douchewads, right? It's one thing "oops. You accidentally got pregnant, we don't believe in abortion, and we don't want kids, so you have to put the baby up for adoption" it's another, "let's knock her up by strangers, and tell her that she's not even allowed to raise the baby herself"].. Older entries talk about feeling shame, guilt, etc for what she does. I won't go into detail, but if she has doubts like this, why continue doing them.

If the following are your current dominants, I would have looked elsewhere ages ago. What you have written is not true! That is why people who engage in BDSM have such things as LIMITS! Also, a submissive doesn't have to remain submissive to people who force things on them.
quote:

I talked to Masters about the semen training. They explained that is a requirement for them and probably for most Masters. It does not matter if you are a woman or a man. If you are a sub or slave you must learn to master the art of swallowing semen. No matter where it comes from. With me they are requiring more because I do not like it.

quote:

Masters informed me of an event coming soon. They told me that they have a guy with a very thick penis, and he will penetrate me anally. They said it will hurt a lot, they know i will cry, posibly scream. That is ok. And more than normal amount of people will be attending that day.


marin mentions "k...." TWICE in her journal [another time she uses ".." so she doesn't have to fully spell "breeding"], I would like to know what that is.. This could also play a factor in this current thread because 2015 is a long time ago.
quote:

5/3/2015 11:32:14 AM
I had my first experience with k... It was not as bad as I though it would be. But it was only oral. The part I did not like too much was that they had several family members and some friends watching.


I guess we all need to update our limits. To think it seems like a given that some things would be off limits, family being one of them. Thank you for this! I guess one can never be too detailed.

< Message edited by kkaliforniaa -- 6/19/2017 4:01:40 AM >

(in reply to maringloria69)
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RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 7:11:12 AM   
kkaliforniaa


Posts: 256
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline
You also mentioned in a journal entry
quote:

7/9/2015 10:08:54 AM
I must explain myself as people have an erroneous idea of what i do or like. I am not a sexual person. Never have been. My pleasure does not come from the sexual act. It comes from obeying a command. It is hard to explain. I like the humiliation of being told to do things while others watch. I love it when they say good girl or well done or we are so proud of you.

you may have learned to enjoy sex, but if you haven't, why are you doing something you don't enjoy. Like with your semen post, submission doesn't require sex! Why did you submit to these people? How many people had you submitted to prior to them? How many people did you consider before them? Are your "dominants" fullfilling your desire to be humiliated, WITHOUT you having sex [anal, oral, or vaginal]? How do they react if you say you don't want to do something? Etc

(in reply to kkaliforniaa)
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RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 9:13:11 AM   
unclebob


Posts: 22
Joined: 11/21/2007
Status: offline
K means K 9

according to her every week

in her own words:

maringloria69 on 6/16/17 at 7:57 AM:

maringloria69 on 6/16/17 at 12:34 PM:

"Masters own the dogs. I do them once a week"
"german shepard, black lab and siberian husky.
yes, they wear boots on their paws. the ones used up north for the snow"
"dog semen more liquid, very easy to swallow"
"start by giving oral. put peanut butter around and in vagina. "



(in reply to kkaliforniaa)
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RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 9:14:50 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32561
Status: offline
And, with that post, I'm out.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to unclebob)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 9:51:56 AM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9361
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline
Me too.

_____________________________

wE arE tHe voiCes,
We SAtuRaTe yOur aLPHA brain WAveS, ThIs is nOt A DrEAm The wiZaRd of Oz, shoES, CaLcuLUs, DECorAtiNG, FrIDGE SProcKeTs, be VeRy sCareDed – SLoBbers,We DeEManDErs Sloowee DAnCiNG, SmOOches – whisper whisper & CaAkEE

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 3:27:58 PM   
kkaliforniaa


Posts: 256
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline
First, unless marin actually says this herself, anyone can say anything. What I quoted was from her journal, not private emails. Second, if "K" is what bob says it is [which makes sense, but unless it comes straight from her], I don't agree with it, but it doesn't answer the other questions I asked. If marin actually wants help she should address things, whether to others or just herself, that I asked.. She could just be some person who is easily manipulated and thinks that this is how submission works.

"My kink may not be your kink" and all that.

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: i need advice - 6/19/2017 3:47:13 PM   
unclebob


Posts: 22
Joined: 11/21/2007
Status: offline


Now bubba, if you had a profile that could be accessed and not on hide,

I would have sent this to you and no one else.

You do not have an accessible profile, with an email addy, and so it went here.

She said what she said. I don't make shit up.

Anybody that says that I do......

can

.... well you can imagine

You got a problem, talk to me privately and not on here.

Or shut the fuck up.

I do not like rude posts, but I do not like this kind of accusation either even more.


..

(in reply to kkaliforniaa)
Profile   Post #: 20
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