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RE: what makes a good slave? - 11/26/2017 4:53:07 PM   
tamaka


Posts: 5079
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub22

Your straight forward style isn't the problem - the problem was that i had no idea what you found to be a problem in my original post. So, basically, your lack of communication skills on-line would be the problem. Unfortunately, i couldn't hear the rest of the conversation in your head to explain your post.


There was no conversation in my head. I merely made an observation.

(in reply to kiwisub22)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/10/2017 8:00:20 AM   
shaitan11


Posts: 3
Joined: 8/9/2009
Status: offline
complete honesty

(in reply to kiwisub22)
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RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/13/2017 7:40:22 AM   
gem7


Posts: 8
Joined: 2/9/2013
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thank you, shaita11, for commenting. complete honesty...what does that look like? i am assuming that, that would be in response to if i am asked something, and the rest of the time remain silent. how does one get to complete honesty? fearlessness comes to mind (grin)

(in reply to shaitan11)
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RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/13/2017 6:48:52 PM   
NoirMetal


Posts: 508
Joined: 3/20/2017
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Someone mentally sound who wants a solid partnership with a leader type.

Wounded birds need not apply.

_____________________________

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQeNASx7ksM

(in reply to gem7)
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RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/13/2017 7:44:59 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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Why do you expect not to be allowed to speak unless he asks you a direct question?
Is that your idea of a fulfilling relationship, not being allowed to share good news or ask for support on a bad day?

Some of us are required to speak up and tell our partners that we’re angry with them or that we aren’t in the mood for sex, but we really need a hug.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to NoirMetal)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/13/2017 7:49:10 PM   
NoirMetal


Posts: 508
Joined: 3/20/2017
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Why do you expect not to be allowed to speak unless he asks you a direct question?
Is that your idea of a fulfilling relationship, not being allowed to share good news or ask for support on a bad day?

Some of us are required to speak up and tell our partners that we’re angry with them or that we aren’t in the mood for sex, but we really need a hug.



Probably because we call that "vanilla" Desi. Some men like conversation and ideas when they are rested and ready to hear it......Not just another annoying,unscheduled outburst from the ""drama llama."

_____________________________

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQeNASx7ksM

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RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/29/2017 6:44:37 AM   
Pangolin


Posts: 5
Joined: 5/28/2006
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For us, a good slave is motivated, before all, fully understanding her role in the household, knowing how to please the Masters, and finding primarily in the satisfaction of the Masters her own pleasure.

After, you can go in details like in a fractal pattern, but mainly, we expect that from a slave.

--
Pangolin

(in reply to NoirMetal)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/29/2017 11:22:48 AM   
DocStrange


Posts: 1076
Joined: 6/10/2015
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quote:

ORIGINAL: gem7

hello, i am gem7. while i have been a member for several years, this is my first time posting.
i am in training as slave 24/7. i wish to learn more about serving, to improve my service to Master.
so i am asking, what makes a good slave? what qualities and attributes do you value in a slave? i realize that each relationship, Master, and slave is unique, however, i want to be the best slave i can be for Master, and would appreciate any comments intended to help me improve my service. thankyou for your time.


Pay attention to you Master’s habit and practices. Learn to notice the smalls things he enjoys as well as the big things. Pay attention to detail. Learn to anticipate what he wants and when he wants it. Does he want to read the newspaper when he get home from work? Have the paper waiting for him on a table by his reading chair. Does he like his toast buttered on one side or both sides? What does he like to eat for breakfast? How much cream and sugar does he like in his coffee? Each person will have their unique wants, habits, desires. If you can learn them and anticipate his wants, it can help. Also having honest conversations with your Master asking if what you are doing make him happy or is there something else you can do?

_____________________________

Master of the Mystic Arts
Proprieter Verließ Von Strange
Rubber Fetishist
SciFi Fanatic

(in reply to gem7)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/29/2017 12:19:27 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NoirMetal


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Why do you expect not to be allowed to speak unless he asks you a direct question?
Is that your idea of a fulfilling relationship, not being allowed to share good news or ask for support on a bad day?

Some of us are required to speak up and tell our partners that we’re angry with them or that we aren’t in the mood for sex, but we really need a hug.



Probably because we call that "vanilla" Desi. Some men like conversation and ideas when they are rested and ready to hear it......Not just another annoying,unscheduled outburst from the ""drama llama."



Relationship skills are universal. If you aren’t interested in fulfilling your partner’s needs, don’t expect them to want to fulfill yours.

You can’t treat intimate partners as toys you put on a shelf, ignoring them until you want to play with them.
If you want that, then the relationship must be inherently casual, fuck buddies, NSA.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to NoirMetal)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: what makes a good slave? - 12/12/2022 7:51:01 AM   
MrIXLong


Posts: 4
Joined: 8/7/2022
Status: offline
Absolute obedience to your Master.

(in reply to gem7)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: what makes a good slave? - 1/25/2024 2:14:23 PM   
WhiteWolfy


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/5/2013
From: Germany
Status: offline
It is quiet concerning how little energy some of the people who answered put in their answers ="advice". I know this post is old and most likely the person who wrote it, is long gone. I am writing this because random people will come, and read and make up their own mind (at least i hope everyone has it's own power of discernment)

What makes a good slave?
Nothing. It depends on the compatibility, the vanilla compatibility + the bdsm one. You can be the best slave ever, if you are not compatible in thinking, emotions, behavior and expectations... you will end up breaking up.

A new slave is like an empty canvas, in the hands of someone who has no idea what he is doing, it will become something hideous and in real life situation = it will become a woman full of traumas and triggers. If it is in the hands of a balanced Master, voila! It can become a piece of art, something that will inspire others.

A slave with experience, that's another story. She has to fight her own demons, putting aside everything she knows from the previous experiences and Masters in her life. The most shitty thing she fights with... are her own expectations.

Now putting aside those details, whether she is new or with experience, first thing she has to learn (sadly from experience) is about self esteem. First question any slave should have in mind is "What makes me a slave? Why am I a slave?" If the answers that come back have something to do with traumas in her past, then she is a slave to her own dramas. If the answers come back because of self esteem, talk about it, train it, best thing is realizing and then educating herself. If the answers go into the direction of "I feel like I want a man to be the leader of the house, that is what makes me feminine", well then that is the start of a healthy slave mind. If she is a strong feminist and a slave, oh well, error 404, eternal war between emotions and what has been imposed from society.

Now that we cleared the first question, she goes to the next question "How can i communicate my feelings / thoughts?" Some people can communicate better in writing, others in talking, others by doing. Both partners have to identify which type of communication suits them and communicate it verbally or written to the partner. Make sure the message has been received, make sure the communication was effective. If the subject is important, make sure you choose a good moment. When is a good moment? When you are both lazy home. How do you make sure? You ask the partner if he is ok, tell him you want to talk about something important and ask him nicely if he can have such a conversation in that moment. Don't be a drama lama if he says no. Most problems appear in relationships when both of the partners don't know how to communicate efficiently.

Next: Pride! Haha, yea, you heard me, pride is your enemy. Pride and slavery have nothing in common. If you can't make the connection, prideful people put themselves first, they rarely compliment, they wait usually to be served. Usually Masters have pride, it ain't for the slaves.
Next: Follow. After you learned the basic skill -> communication. It will come times when you have to follow. Sometimes like a mindless puppet, other times asking questions and even if you don't like the answers, you still follow. This will slowly bring you to the next stage which is called trust.
Next: Trust, well this is a tricky one, you have to trust yourself to trust him. Trust yourself that he is better than you in making decisions, in the end, you're the one who chose him right? If you don't trust your own decision of choosing a good partner, than go back to the first point and that is called self esteem
Next: Respect. This one isn't tricky at all. If you managed to read so far, this one should be the easiest thing. You respect your Master by communicating what's on your mind and heart, by following him, by trusting him. Quiet simple right?

After all these steps, both should be pretty happy and remember slavery comes from the heart, submission is not a physical thing, it is the emotional need to lose control, funny enough you earn a lot of freedom by being surrounded by safe fences.

Tips and tricks: choose wisely who you surrender yourself to. You will take his teachings seriously, you will copy him in time like a monkey, try to copy a intelligent one, or at least one smarter than you.


_____________________________

A woman with glasses in a blind world.

(in reply to MrIXLong)
Profile   Post #: 31
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