Madonna-Whore Submissives (Full Version)

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losttreasure -> Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 5:54:36 PM)

A question was raised in the General BDSM forum about finishing schools for subs, and the majority of the answers related to the types of finishing schools that teach grace, etiquette, and the finer social skills.  Somewhat tongue-in-cheek, I pondered if this "finishing" was really something that a dom would want his sub to have.  The impression I've received from doms is that they are more interested in subs learning to let out their "inner slut" (and often quite publicly)... which is quite a ways from wanting her to be able to host a tea party.

I thought perhaps I would bring this question here since I am very interested to find out if many dominants consider it just as important for their sub to be refined, as it is for them to be sexually uninhibited and demonstratively brazen. 

Do you think it's important enough to seek professional training for your sub?




popeye1250 -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 6:40:13 PM)

Sure, I'd want a sub to be trained and knowledgable in the finer things in life.
I like the "service" aspects of a sub or slave too so I'd want her to be fully aware of manners in serving too.
Would I send her for training,  of course!




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 7:02:22 PM)

I would like all my female slaves to be trained in areas that suit their personalities. Thus, girl anne might take a horticulture class and boi moe might take motorcycle maintanence. Each has uses and neither one has to be a slut to make me happy. Same hold true for the males.

Master Fire




mastersayed -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 7:22:32 PM)

The answer would be no. Many people can a train a slave. Only I can train her to my liking.




Arpig -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 7:37:22 PM)

No, not important enough to send her for professional training.




KnightofMists -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 8:04:18 PM)

A Lady in the Parlour..... A Whore in the Bedroom!   need I say more.


Well maybe.... simply the appropriate behaviors in a given situation is what I appreciate.  Both my girls are rather quiet and even reserved in a public situation, particular with people they are unfamiliar with.  However, they are very lady like and not loud seeking attention even with groups that they are familiar or comfortable with.  In play, it's a different situation, I expect a whole different set of behaviors to occur.  I wouldn't wnat them to be loud and whorish in a nice dinner party and i wouldn't want to be a quiet inhibited woman in the bed.  

Also, this is two seperate individuals.. this is one person that lets the appropriate behaviors being demonstrate in any given situation.  My girls make me very happy in this regard.

As far as learning what they need in a given situation... I draw on whatever would be effective in getting the best results.




mistoferin -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 8:24:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
Well maybe.... simply the appropriate behaviors in a given situation is what I appreciate. 


As a submissive, this is an area that I am frequently complimented on. I can carry myself as well at a black tie affair as I can at backyard BBQ or a biker party. I can be fun and charming...but not attention seeking. I pride myself in being an asset...not an embarassment. I am equally skilled on the finer points of service in a setting where I have to be refined as I am in a casual setting.

In play and sex...I can go from lady to feral quite quickly. That would depend upon the direction I am steered by my partner though of course.

It has been in my experience that Dominants do appreciate having the best of both worlds.




KnightofMists -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 9:40:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

It has been in my experience that Dominants do appreciate having the best of both worlds.


it's not a question of Best of Both Worlds... It's the Best of Whatever World one happens to be in at the time.  Somehow... I don't think anyone wants to be with someone behaving in a manner that is inappropriate in a given situation.

and erin... my compliments on your adaptability to changing situations.... It is indeed a fine quality to be place along side many that I already see in you.




IronBear -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/1/2006 11:54:20 PM)

This is part of the training of any girl I or HIB owns. Assuming that she is physically able whe would be taught professionally belly dancing. If there were things like theraputic massage she may be sent for trainiong in this too. Most other aspect, I would be training her as part of the normal regime so she could be taken to dinner with the Governor or anywhere else and yet know how to deal with BBQ's etc.. The bedroom is of minor importance.. 




SirDarkside357 -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/2/2006 3:54:52 AM)

Dang it IB, you beat me to it again...I'm always a day late and a dollar short....... anyway, I ditto what IB said.

Darkside




mp072004 -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/2/2006 6:04:09 AM)

I don't particularly want a female submissive to be demonstratively brazen. I certainly wouldn't encourage it. I want submissives to have some amount of comfort in their sexualities, but I don't want performative sexuality.

Good manners are attractive to me. The tea-party stuff is sort of extreme, but precise writing, and clear speech that doesn't rely on nasty slang or excessive use of the vocal pause (vapid noises--Um, Er, Like)--yes, I would encourage and teach those graces.

Monica




PiercedHeart -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/2/2006 6:25:13 AM)

To me, a submissive/slave is all about putting on "masks"...not literaly, I mean personalities that replace who they are, with who I want them to be...the more masks they can wear, the better...so if I want them to be a maid on Tuesday, that mask should completely take over their personality...in order for them to wear that mask, they should be completely trained in that area...so the short answer is...yes!




shadevarr -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 12:32:31 AM)

If the Dom is unable to train in those aspects but he does with for them I see no fault in it. Myself, if I can't train them then I have no reason to let someone else touch them.




TheShadows -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 1:01:54 AM)

If professional training is necessary to complete our desired skill set for that particular slave, yes.  If it's important enough for us to desire our slave to learn it, it's important enough for us to find someone of a professional quality who'll teach the slave what they need to know to successfully display/use that skill.

As always, YMMV...
MrsShadows




nephandi -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 3:03:36 AM)

i dont think it matter mutch if the education if official or not, as long as the girl, or boy is trained so their Master or Dom have the most use of them.




JustaDom -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 5:32:56 AM)

There is a time and a place for everything.  While wanton sexuality is great at home and in some other circumstances it is very inappropriate for most vanilla events, like a company holiday party.  (Unless you work in the porn industry, then it is probably kosher.)

Refinement isn't just knowing what fork to use, it is also a mindset.  The submissives I meet that stand out from the crowd have class, style, and wit.  They are gracious hosts and pleasant guests.  Simply put, they help their dominant look good.  I'd gladly have someone trained, either by someone in the community or a vanilla professional, to make me look better.  This kind of training pays for itself.

That, and it is more fun to degrade and humiliate the prim and proper.

Joe 




spankmepink11 -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 6:04:10 AM)

I take pride in being able to handle myself well in any given social situation, as well as being open enough to be anything my Partner requires of me privately.  I think it has a lot to do with how we're raised....schooled...etc.  

I have noticed however ,that many Dominant males are excited by the idea of forced public wanton behaviour in their sub/slave or provatively dressing them to the point of being slightly innapropriate.  Some have said they do so for the humiliation aspect....and some have stated that they simply enjoy "showing off their property. I've even gotten the impression that some do so  simply to measure the depths of the sub/slaves obedience.







nephandi -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 6:31:07 AM)

i think it waries alot, if one is in a sosial setting where it is okey, many Dominants might take plessure in having their slaves show alot of sexuality, but if for example inviting the boss and his wife for dinner, the Master will probably not want his slave trowing herself over his boss. Or when you conservative old grandfather of 95 years of age come to visit you dont want your slave jumping him and offering him a blowjob. Most Masters i have talked whit want somone that can function in varid social settings, and function well. They want to hear.

"Mark what a delightful host Margerie is."

When inviting the neigbors for lunch and.

"Mark your slave is realy a sexual little vixen."

When he teks her to a BDSM club.




losttreasure -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 10:16:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
Well maybe.... simply the appropriate behaviors in a given situation is what I appreciate. 


As a submissive, this is an area that I am frequently complimented on. I can carry myself as well at a black tie affair as I can at backyard BBQ or a biker party. I can be fun and charming...but not attention seeking. I pride myself in being an asset...not an embarassment. I am equally skilled on the finer points of service in a setting where I have to be refined as I am in a casual setting.

In play and sex...I can go from lady to feral quite quickly. That would depend upon the direction I am steered by my partner though of course.

It has been in my experience that Dominants do appreciate having the best of both worlds.


This, Erin, does makes sense to me, and it is what I would have imagined would be the case.  Versatility in social areas is a skill, and one that isn't as common as might be thought... perhaps one of the reasons that your behavior has garnered compliments.  [;)]




losttreasure -> RE: Madonna-Whore Submissives (8/3/2006 10:21:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

... It's the Best of Whatever World one happens to be in at the time.  Somehow... I don't think anyone wants to be with someone behaving in a manner that is inappropriate in a given situation.



I think you are right.  I suppose the key would be a dom understanding what social situations a sub might be expected to interact within, and their experience and comfort level with that setting. 




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