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Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:19:06 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		What is your personal defination of a perfectionist?  I have come to realize that it means different things to different people.  I was married to a perfectionist for 30 yrs and I have vowed never to become involved with another one again...is being a perfectionist a good thing or a bad thing?

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:37:27 PM   
Fawne


Posts: 462
Status: offline 		Good Q, Cuddleheart, TY. I can be a perfectionist. But, of course one can never be "perfect". So, in not being perfect, I end up kicking myself in the ass, acting like one once in a while and creating a negative cycle.

This is a quite recently learned experience; yet I'll never forget. I will forgive instead and try, try again, but with a postive loving mindset which includes loving myself.

take care and lots of love and luck to you

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:40:19 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		An anal-retentive asshole?

(in reply to Fawne)
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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:41:42 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		yep, thats what I had ...eek!!!...nothing I ever did was good enough, nothing!!!  It was hell...

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:49:39 PM   
joyinslavery


Posts: 955
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

What is your personal defination of a perfectionist?  I have come to realize that it means different things to different people.  I was married to a perfectionist for 30 yrs and I have vowed never to become involved with another one again...is being a perfectionist a good thing or a bad thing?


Someone who strives for perfection.  A worthy (?) yet (of course) unattainable goal. 

Okay, that's a bit simplistic but I've got to get back to Comedy Central. 

_____________________________

"...we must learn, each one of us, that the world was not made for us, and that, however beautiful may be the things we crave, Fate may nevertheless forbid them."
-Bertrand Russell

Mainstream...The New Alternative

*Beware of dog*

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:53:02 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I think a perfectionist usually runs into problems because they expect their partner to be perfect or be as much of a perfectionist as they are.

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Boycott Whales!

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:57:11 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		A perfectionist is a type of control freak who gains a sense of security by trying to manage everything perfectly in hopes that the world will be well and good if they are successful.

It's usually a very self centered, insecure, and anxious person as well, but perfectionism can be used in a positive and productive way if moderated properly.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 6:58:41 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		wow, you just described my ex....amazing.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:00:09 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

wow, you just described my ex....amazing.

It helps that I AM a perfectionist myself :)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:00:27 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		A perfectionist to me is someone I will never be.  I'm more like a I like my life in order-ist type.  But perfection...never.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:03:12 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		How can you be happy being a perfectionist knowing that nothing will ever be perfect?

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:05:49 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

How can you be happy being a perfectionist knowing that nothing will ever be perfect?


Exactly.

_____________________________

Boycott Whales!

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:12:43 PM   
Sasy


Posts: 1387
Joined: 7/5/2004
From: Texas
Status: offline 		They  say  practice make perfect ...  well I  do not  believe anything or any  one is truly perfect  but now the practicing ...  * smirk * Sometimes that can  be fun !!!!!!!!!

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"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit." ~ Albert Schweitzer

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:12:55 PM   
Kagesuta


Posts: 36
Joined: 9/15/2005
From: Da Druben
Status: offline 		per·fec·tion·ism    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (pr-fksh-nzm)
n.
  1. A propensity for being displeased with anything that is not perfect or does not meet extremely high standards.
  2. A belief in certain religions that moral or spiritual perfection can be achieved before the soul has passed into the afterlife.
per·fection·ist adj. & n.
per·fection·istic adj.

As far as my opinion on it... It tends to be an annoying trait, if said perfectionist lets it rule their life. But I think they have medication for that.


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Remember, there are always more fish in the sea. And women, too, if you aren't into fish.

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RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:15:08 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		I wish I knew about the meds for my then husband.....he was never happy because nothing was ever right in his eyes, what a terrible way to live your life.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to Kagesuta)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:17:50 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline 		They have pills (and schools for that matter) for everything.  Just watch the shit on American TV...  You will see it between all the lawyers' commercials.

_____________________________

Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:27:17 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Too late for the pills now, we are divorced...finally!!!

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to SirKenin)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:29:27 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		Was he one of those people who washes their hands all the time?

(in reply to SirKenin)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:33:03 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		yep, he washed his hands all the time, was constantly cleaning "something", "anything"....everything had to be in its place at all times ( thats hard to do with children)....no matter how much I cleaned, he would Always find something that I missed and complain about that. 

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Perfectionist - 8/2/2006 7:33:04 PM   
kunlex2003


Posts: 5
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		I know some people might think as waht you said. for someone to be perfect is very common unless he/she is very perfect in everything.
I can assured that there is no one perfect than others unless the other part broke off the relationship.
That is my own view...but i normally perfects in my side no fock up with other guys..treating them as myself...that is all my believe is around the perfectionist.

(in reply to Estring)
Profile   Post #: 20
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