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Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/14/2006 2:46:19 PM

FLsubmalecd

Posts: 143
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I just wanted to take a moment and publicly express my gratitude to a couple of Ladies/Dommes that took a moment to write to me and express their feelings about my recent release. I will also admit, that one of them is a Pro Domme and this has greatly altered my opinion about "most" Pro Dommes...Not all. She was very nice to comment on my profile and what is going on in my life right now. It is just nice to see someone take the time to express an opinion or offer support to someone that is going through a very difficult time in their life. Thank You Ladies.
I feel so alone and useless since my release form the wonderful Woman I love so much. I never knew it could hurt this much.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/14/2006 7:02:58 PM

masochistboy

Posts: 24
Joined: 6/2/2005
From: Melbourne
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Well, erm....congrats on the emails from your Domme friends =)
but sorry to hear about your release =( that must really suck hardcore.
*hugs* there, there.. ehhe

Hope it gets better for ya mate...

(in reply to FLsubmalecd)

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/14/2006 8:28:42 PM

FLsubmalecd

Posts: 143
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: masochistboy

Well, erm....congrats on the emails from your Domme friends =)
but sorry to hear about your release =( that must really suck hardcore.
*hugs* there, there.. ehhe

Hope it gets better for ya mate...

Thank you my friend. Yes, you can say it sucks hardcore. I am deeply in love with Her. There is a chance we can resolve some issues and Goddess willing, we will be back together. If not, I don't know what I will do.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/14/2006 8:57:33 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

Some of us are sweethearts :) Congrats on finding TWO! You must have deserved it :)

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Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/15/2006 8:21:31 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FLsubmalecd

quote:

ORIGINAL: masochistboy

Well, erm....congrats on the emails from your Domme friends =)
but sorry to hear about your release =( that must really suck hardcore.
*hugs* there, there.. ehhe

Hope it gets better for ya mate...

Thank you my friend. Yes, you can say it sucks hardcore. I am deeply in love with Her. There is a chance we can resolve some issues and Goddess willing, we will be back together. If not, I don't know what I will do.

*HUG* on your break-up.

Sadly you can do one of three things folks do in these situations.

Give up entirely on BDSM -- usually doesn't work if you are wired for it.

Immediately jump into another relationship -- odds are against rebound relationships

Take some time to grieve, heal, learn more about yourself, and then when the opportunity arises try again. Personally I recommend this one.

It can be so easy to think it must be all our fault or all the other person's fault -- I suspect usually its just life and the growing apart that folks do or the general imcompatibility we didn't see in the excitement of the starting off.

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Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/15/2006 9:27:27 AM

DivaDuchess

Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
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Don't jump right in with a new relationship. Bad idea.

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Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/15/2006 10:12:15 AM

DeviantLady

Posts: 38
Joined: 9/12/2006
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Take the time out to lick your wounds, make some friends yes. Chances are if you two stayed in the same area you have the same friends. So make some new ones of your own and try and move on with your life. It is easier to try and move forward and say if we get back together we do but it very rarely happens so dont just sit about and wait for her go out and have some time.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/15/2006 4:47:15 PM

LTRsubNW

Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Some of us are sweethearts :) Congrats on finding TWO! You must have deserved it :)

(Actually, I deserved it, but I'm congratulating him nonetheless...solely because I'm a standup kinda guy).

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/15/2006 11:56:41 PM

lilyophelia

Posts: 38
Joined: 1/5/2004
Status: offline

Okay, this is so off topic, but is the picture from Fushigi Yuugi? Is that Tomahome (sp?) and Miaka? If so, i think it's a very cute profile pic ^^

Moving on...separations. You know, i broke up with my very first love, after five years, and it was traumatic and awful, and very sad. i believed, for all of our troubles, that we would always be together...in a forever sort of way. These days, i could never imagine myself with her. Instead of struggling to be happy, i have to struggle to find reasons to be unhappy (and i'm not allowed to actually try to be sad, so...). What i'm saying, i guess, is that sometimes break-ups and separations are neccessary, because they open the door to the next, and hopefully better, experience. If you've learned a lot from your service to this last Individual, you'll hopefully be able to apply it to another relationship, making it even better.

And...there is always the chance that you and your previous Domme will work things out, after a bit of time away from each other. Sometimes, a bit of distance can put everything back into persepective. i had this experience just a bit ago, when my Miss was away for a whole month, and we could hardly speak. It was awful and terrible, and i wanted to just fall apart...but mid-way through it, i could see all these things that i couldn't see before, and we talked through them, and now our relationship is so much deeper and more workable than it was before She left. Maybe the same will happen for you.

If you really love Her, and She has left the door in anyway open, then just reaffirm your devotion to Her, even with nothing in return. If it's honest, and sincere, and you strive to address the problems that your specific relationship/arrangement had previously, i can't imagine Her not being touched by all the effort. It might take weeks or months, or longer...and She might never look at you again, but that kind of introspective searching and self-improvement will make you absolutely beautiful to your next Owner/Dominant.

One of the most beautiful and sacred times in my life occured when i was single, and very alone. Of course i was sad, but i grew so much, and i had so much time to devote to just adoring life. If you have to move on, fight the temptation to jump into a rebound relationship. Flirt a bit, scene casually, have good friends, or just spend time alone for a while...when you're ready, you'll find the place where you belong. ^^

Good luck, and lots of encouraging huggles,
lily

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http://lilyophelia.blogspot.com/ - Currently in the middle of a giggly-blushy lesbian story between a Lady and a younger girl.

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RE: Two Dommes wrote to me. I'm impressed! - 10/16/2006 4:03:02 AM

FLsubmalecd

Posts: 143
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I want to thank each and everyone of you for your comments and suggestions. It touches me to see others writing here to help ease someones pain.
Yes, I was released. She asked for Her collar back. But I did not want to go into detail and left out the fact that we were very much still talking. So the simple fact is we both love each other and have come up with a way to work through the issues She has. Basically, we slowed down, stepped back and have agreed to start over with new rules and guidelines. No, She has not offered Her collar back to me yet. Some unfinished business has to be taken care of before that is considered. But there is a very good chance that issue will be resolved by the end of the month. So now we have a much better understanding, a clear goal and direction that we both will follow. We both want and need the same things in life and we are working on it.
Today, I am once again a very happy man. I have the opportunity to love and serve the love of my life. I just need to be patient, understanding, and more aware of what Her needs and feelings are.
Once again, I thank all of you for your comments, suggestions and thoughts.

BJ

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