adaddysgirl
Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ellecid
Another series of posts I read with great interest. But now... I am really confused!! First let me preface my statements by saying that I do not wish to offend anyone with what I say. Please understand that I am relatively new to this (as I have mentioned numerous times before), and I am in the tedious process of exploration and self discovery. If my banterings come across as stupid or offensive, I am truely sorry. That having been said, I am of the opinion that love and submission go hand in hand. I have read many times here that submission is the ultimate gift that one gives to another. If you arent in love with that person, why would you want to submit to them? I suppose some would say 'for the pure pleasure of submitting'. I just cant imagine giving that part of my body and soul to someone.... just because, and especially, on his whim. I would definately have to feel a profound 'something or other' for him. I am feeling that if a submissive does not love her Dom/Master, that the submission would just be another word for what is really sexual gratification for both partners??? Unless the person is a slave, and is expected to carry out other duties. Or, maybe the debate is about what that 'something' is called (trust, respect, sexual desire, love). Or, perhaps that's what separates me from a true submissive? There is sooo much to learn.
First of all ellecid, you will find that whatever you read on these forums (or anywhere on the net for that matter) is going to vary from person to person and from relationship to relationship....so try to take it all with a grain of salt.
i tend to look for a LT relationship and love. When i choose a potential partner, i do so because i like the person as a person (as much as i know about him at the time), and because i feel there is the potential for love, and because he is looking for the same.
i started out that way with the first 2 doms i met but they didn't last long enough to develop to the "love stage". However, i did submit to them in the time i was with them. Admittedly though, those did turn out to be based on sexual submission more than anything because neither of them dommed outside of the bedroom (but i did not know that until we got into it).
When i met my first Daddy Dom, we just really 'clicked'....and over time, i felt very loving feelings for him. i can't describe the difference with those feelings involved, but it was awesome! And that is what i continue to strive for.
But as you can see here, that is not a requirement for others. Neither do all subs feel that submission is a gift. Again, the more you read, the more you will note the variations between people. No one is right or wrong....people just view it or do it differently.
And forget about not being a 'true submissive'. As you go along and find what's right for you....your submission will be true to you and and your partner....and that's what will matter most. And it may not match one other subs submission or 1000 others, but that's not going to make it any less real.
Best wishes to you.
Daddysgirl
_____________________________
I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.
Frederick Douglas
"I am in a relationship which employs punishment because it fulfills me to do
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RE: Whats love got to do with it. - 
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