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RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 10:39:48 AM

Posts: 32
Joined: 1/23/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kree

***PERSONAL OPINION***
Forget this collar of consideration crap. Many people feel that the "collar of consideration" would be more aptly named "the blow job collar"... You sit around while he considers and he runs around trying to see who else he can score with. Do you really want to allow someone to place a bookmark in your life and learning curve just so they can know that you are available when they wish to avail themself? I am sure that there will be posts about how valuable someone found a collar of consideration, but if honesty prevailed, you would hear from many people who bought into that and were used and tricked. All of the interaction between two people is a time of consideration... why create something deeper while you "think about it"?

What you say is true, however, don't 'throw the baby out with the bathwater'... the CoC has it's place.

For Me, it is allowing me to 1) get to know a darling sub girl, 2) keep her under my protection from the idiots out there without disallowing her her freedom, and 3) act as her guide and teacher in the prudent online safety and meetup safety rules. It is also allowing my wife to get to know her and get comfortable with her in my life without the full commitment (which us jumping into would make my wife uncomfortable at this point). If, after a nice patient 'get to know one another' time, all of us feel we are ready for the full commitment that a collar should (IMHO) mean, then we will proceed.

So, while I agree that the CoC could be (and sometimes IS) abused, I think it is better to get word out to all the subs out there that they should never feel like a doormat. Submission is a precious gift, and a sub should always feel like when they give it, it is treasured. If not, move on ASAP.

(in reply to Kree)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 10:53:22 AM

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
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quote:

prudent online safety

How do you offer that?
Do you constantly remind her not to give out her social security number and mother's maiden name to bad Doms?

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Knight0Errant)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 10:53:55 AM

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Joined: 10/27/2006
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Well....I am a young online Dom, and I suspect that there are many who won't value my opinion upon hearing that but I'm saying it anyway. I'm going to take a wild guess and say that the Dom in question is also a young online Dom, the difference between be and him, indeed between me and 95% of young online Doms, is that I'm not a complete c***.

It's not the incest, in fact I'm faintly disgusted to hear people on a site like this of all places suggesting that consensual incest should result in prison....it's not that he is asking you to send her picture without her knowing or knowing the context....although that on its own makes him at least 80% c*** in my opinion.
It's the trade off, you don't buy your Doms time. I doubt I'm eloquent to explain why I feel that so strongly but I'm sure most will understand.

Wood

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:01:38 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressMorgin

I think incest fantasies are very common. What about all the Daddy Doms out there? Or the slaves looking for a Mommy or Daddy. Those people may not fantasize about their real realitives, then again maybe they do. But to think that incest fantasies are rare I think is not taking everything into account. That doesnt make non-consentual sex of any kind right. Im just saying the fantasy is out there in larger numbers in my opinion.

Just because there are Daddy/Mommy Relationships.. is not a reflection of Incest fantasies. It would be jumping to conclusion based on what is often an unrelated relationship. Do these two concepts co-exist... most likely... but in many cases they don't. To make such a relationship is generally because a person doesn't appreciate the motivating factors of Daddy/Mommy style relationships in the firsts place.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to MistressMorgin)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:07:17 AM

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Joined: 11/5/2004
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As a twin, i have had more than one potential Dom who asked about my twin sister, commented on Topping both of us at once, so how wide spread is the fantasy, i'm not sure, but based on my experience, it comes up quite often.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:13:17 AM

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Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NC
Status: offline

Let's see now ... more time with Him ... in exchange for a pic of your sister.

He offers something you want because you, perhaps, care about Him ... and He asks for a pic of your sister.

Best piece of advice I ever got came from my business partner. There are all kinds of assholes out there. Some will fool you, some won't. Either way, all you have to do is remember one word:

NEXT!

_____________________________

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:19:23 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darksdesire

Hmmm. Now that would be an interesting poll...I do wonder how many would admit to incest fantasies though, even in such a place as this.

It is an interesting question on how many would admit to incest fantasies. In a place like this forum, I would be both be surprized and question the integrity of the answer in the first place. A Poll here is hardly going to provide any creditable result.

There is alot of different research with regards to sexual fantasies... alot of which began with Freud. Today alot of the popular beliefs can shown to be routed in the theories and opinions that Freud first addressed. Unfortuanately, many of these same theories and opinions have been studied and shown to have little if any credibility. It is taking time for alot of these misconception in pop-culture to be shown for what they are ... erranous claims based on scant and tainted data.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to darksdesire)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:22:52 AM

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

LA I am glad to see someone finally posting from a logical place and not an entirely yick factor. I wasn't going to say anything because I feel I'm probably not the best person for the post considering, I have no problem if two people who're related want to play. It's not immoral it's not gross, it's not making any one go to hell. or any of the negative things one might think.

The problem is and I do have, when one person wants to drag another person into it who's unwitting and who's sister is unwilling.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

How young is the sister? That's really my only issue here.

Why is it ok for all these doms here to send their girls trolling for another female to play with, but not if it's a biological sister?

It's a kink, as long as it's with consensual adults, we should be ok with this. If she's not into it, that's fine and she should say so and he should either stop or end the relationship.

I know a lot of people are squicked by incestual relationships- but a lot aren't. A lot of people are squicked by needles, a lot aren't. Deal with it.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:29:40 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

As a twin, i have had more than one potential Dom who asked about my twin sister, commented on Topping both of us at once, so how wide spread is the fantasy, i'm not sure, but based on my experience, it comes up quite often.

But this is not incest now is it? Unless of course the person is stating or impling that you and your sister would become intimately involved in a sexual capacity. A person needs to seperate the idea of sexually being involved with two sisters from having the two sisters involved with each other. In addition... this also raises a difference between incest fantasies that are direct involvement as compared to indirect involvement. A person fantasies to have sexual relationship with an immediate relative is incest. But, a person having a fantasy to watch and be involved in the scene is the person engaging in incest? I would say yes... but it is a fine distinction non the less.

But, is it incest because I engage in sexual intimacy with one person and then in an entirely different time engage with that person's immediate relative. Some may think this is hot. ... some may think it is sick. But, I don't see it as incest.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:37:04 AM

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i agree with Your last point, that having two different experiences at two different times does not fall under the incest category for me either. However that was not what the "Doms" in questions were talking about, they were talking about 3-ways with them, my twin sister and myself, which to me definitely falls in the incest category and which is a hard limit for me.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 11:59:17 AM

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Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

Who're you to judge other consenting adults and what goes on between the two consenters, as sick bastards who belong in jail. or pycho wards. Plenty of people think bdsm is sick and twisted, but I bet you wouldn't say someone into healthy mainstream deserves to be in a pycho ward.

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I'm just saying sickos that do that kind of crap should be in prison or locked in psycho wards because they have some serious problems.

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:03:08 PM

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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

How young is the sister? That's really my only issue here.

Why is it ok for all these doms here to send their girls trolling for another female to play with, but not if it's a biological sister?

It's a kink, as long as it's with consensual adults, we should be ok with this. If she's not into it, that's fine and she should say so and he should either stop or end the relationship.

I know a lot of people are squicked by incestual relationships- but a lot aren't. A lot of people are squicked by needles, a lot aren't. Deal with it.

He's not asking her sister. That would be one thing. But he's trying to bribe her into giving him photos of the woman without her consent.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:08:15 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I certainly haven't heard of incest being common either. Fathers and mothers who molest their children are real sickos and end up in prison where they belong. Sister on sister is no different. Incest is incest. To the OP, this dom is one sick bastard and you need to get away from immediately.

It's common. It's like a woman with a rape fantasy. It's not talked about about because nobody wants to admit it. The fantasy itself is no more sick then the rape scenes we play out. And, just in case you aren't understanding: It's not a fantasy of "oh god my daughter is so hot" it's the general idea. Look up porn. Almost every site, be it visual or literary, has a special section just for taboo/incest. You also have to understand that incest not does always mean underage. Many times it doesn't and most of the porn is about consentual encounters.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:09:58 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

So there is nothing wrong with 21 year olds having sex with their father or mother just because they are adults? eeeeeeeewwww

Right... because two consenting adults indulging in a kink that isn't yours is disgusting. Just like all gay people have AIDs and bisexuals are incapable of monogamy.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:25:02 PM

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Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
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As I guess I am going to have to tell daddy I will fuck others cause I am bisexual, and not able to be mono* grinning*

No, I know you didn't say that you were quopting something but I just wanted to jibe ya in a friendly bit of smart assedness:)

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:25:39 PM

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Joined: 10/19/2006
From: Arkansas
Status: offline

Okay, so we leave the incest debate up to the debators. We still have a situation with an unknowing victum (the little sister) and a sub who is being told she has to purchase her Dom's affections and time with pics of her little sister.

Something's wrong there.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:26:12 PM

onestandingstill

Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
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If you've told him this is not possible and he's persisting in trying to convince you to make her a part of things any way I would take that as a red flag.
If he's only considering his fantasy and not what's good for you or the notion your sister has a right to make her own choices I would be concerned he's only out for what he can take from you and not concerned with your well being.
BE VERY CAREFUL,
suzanne

(in reply to LittleDaisyGirl)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:28:00 PM

libertyinservice

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Joined: 11/6/2006
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Here's another two cents. I think that your chosen word to describe his request, "Unbelievable" is quite on the mark. I, as I am sure all of us can relate too, understand wow much variance there is between individuals fantasies. My opinion is quite simply that the Master does not care to respect your individual boundaries. Simply I suggest that if his desired activities are not in line with your own, you should respectfully withdraw your ties to him. My thoughts, for your consideration.... Good luck to you!!

(in reply to SlaveSuru)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:28:07 PM

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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

As I guess I am going to have to tell daddy I will fuck others cause I am bisexual, and not able to be mono* grinning*

No, I know you didn't say that you were quopting something but I just wanted to jibe ya in a friendly bit of smart assedness:)

It's all good. *Grins* I'm just reminding her of something when I should probably be nice and let it go. I guess I'm a freak cause I'm bi and haven't slept but with one man for over a year.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)

RE: Sir's Unbelievable Request - 12/19/2006 12:30:59 PM

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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: drawntothedark

Okay, so we leave the incest debate up to the debators. We still have a situation with an unknowing victum (the little sister) and a sub who is being told she has to purchase her Dom's affections and time with pics of her little sister.

Something's wrong there.

Very wrong. You can't buy love and you shouldn't have to buy attention by dragging in non-consenting parties. I'll support many an odd thing in this relationship but when it violates consent... you are on own your own.

OP: Remember this. Men will come and go till you find the partner for the rest of your life. They will come and go. Your family and friends are the ones who will always be there. Do not betray them.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to drawntothedark)

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