Is common courtesy dead online? (Full Version)

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MasterC70 -> Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 6:50:44 PM)

I really have to wonder if common courtesy even exists online these days.  I'm not talking about typin all caps or flaming someone for their opinion on a topic, I mean plain old fashioned courtesy of the basic sort. Case in point: I e-mailed one lady on the 1st of this month and just tonight she updates that she's under consideration.  In the meanwhile she had been online several times over the last few days and couldn't even show the courtesy of even reading, much less responding to my e-mail to her.  Even if she had written that she wasn't interested because she was being considered that would have shown some courtesy.  But apparently if you can't see the person you are hurting by your lack of manners it's ok to hurt them.  Or so it seems.  It's one thing to be turned down by someone because they don't think you match in interests, etc, and another to be totally ignored for a week without even the basic acknowledgement that you did contact them before they updated their profile.  Both hurt, but the former shows that at least the other person considered your feelings as a fellow human being. The latter just shows that the other person has no respect for the feelings of other people at all.  At least in my opinion.



stef -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 6:55:32 PM)

Common sense certainly appears to be on the decline.  How many times are you planning to post your whiny little rant?

~stef



KatyLied -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 6:56:22 PM)

You are hurt by a stranger not responding to you on-line?  Time to buck up Master.  And this sounds familiar, did you cut/paste from another thread?



Aileen68 -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 6:59:31 PM)

Oooh Katy.  You could have gotten away with using big font for those harsh words.



mnottertail -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:00:08 PM)

Thank you, I am totally envisioning your disgruntlement, I might even say we are one in the universe on this matter-----------


I have found, over time, that regardless of the 'slings and arrows of outrageous fortune'  that not giving a fuck and being of a mein background and disposition is sufficient to carry the day.


Hope this helps, cause I so don't give the glimmer of a fuck.

your obedient servant.
Ron



KatyLied -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:01:03 PM)

You know me, I'm lacking in: plain old fashioned courtesy



sapphireC -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:08:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterC70

I really have to wonder if common courtesy even exists online these days.  I'm not talking about typin all caps or flaming someone for their opinion on a topic, I mean plain old fashioned courtesy of the basic sort. Case in point: I e-mailed one lady on the 1st of this month and just tonight she updates that she's under consideration.  In the meanwhile she had been online several times over the last few days and couldn't even show the courtesy of even reading, much less responding to my e-mail to her.  Even if she had written that she wasn't interested because she was being considered that would have shown some courtesy.  But apparently if you can't see the person you are hurting by your lack of manners it's ok to hurt them.  Or so it seems.  It's one thing to be turned down by someone because they don't think you match in interests, etc, and another to be totally ignored for a week without even the basic acknowledgement that you did contact them before they updated their profile.  Both hurt, but the former shows that at least the other person considered your feelings as a fellow human being. The latter just shows that the other person has no respect for the feelings of other people at all.  At least in my opinion.



The answer to your question is 99.9% yes.  There is no common courtesy online.  If your looking for it on this site, your definitely wasting your time.  There are other sites with forums who actually have people that know the meaning of the words respect and courtesy.  I suggest you look for them and leave this one alone.



MasterC70 -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:11:40 PM)

I named no names, and the point is that I am a stranger just like everyone else here trying to find someone.  Also legitimate venting isn't whining.  My point was that even a stranger deserves some courtesy from his/her peers.  You see this sort of thing everywhere online it seems.  I figure if a person can come online and they have an active personal then they could at least show some courtesy toward their fellows.  No one likes to be totally ignored.  There are still plenty of other fish in the sea so to speak, and I'm not sure I would want someone around that had treated me so poorly before they even knew me anyway.  To quote a very old saying, "what goes round, comes round."   As for respect and courtesy I believe that any relationship that is going to last has to have some of both.   Even in a relationship where one partner dominates the other.  The dom partner may be the top dog in a tpe relationship but how many would show such disrespect toward their sub/slave as to make them sleep on an unheated porch in mid-winter for example?  To do something like that which would endanger the health of a sub/slave would be to show a great lack of respect I think. 



Wulfchyld -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:12:00 PM)

I have a bit of a headache where do I whine about it?



KatyLied -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:14:11 PM)

email a few ladies about your headache.....see how far that gets ya!

[8D]



Wulfchyld -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:15:29 PM)

Okay... but I aint putting out.



stef -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 7:55:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterC70

I named no names, and the point is that I am a stranger just like everyone else here trying to find someone.

Not everyone here is trying to find someone.  Many already have their particular someone(s) and others are just here for the forums.

quote:

Also legitimate venting isn't whining.

Three posts on the same topic is whining.  The legitimacy of your whine is another matter entirely, especially since it's been done to death by your whiny predecessors.

quote:

 My point was that even a stranger deserves some courtesy from his/her peers.

Placing behavioral expectations upon complete strangers is incredibly presumptuous and could even be considered rude, but I'm going to wager that you hadn't considered that particular perspective.

quote:

You see this sort of thing everywhere online it seems.

It's a harsh world out there. 

quote:

 I figure if a person can come online and they have an active personal then they could at least show some courtesy toward their fellows.  No one likes to be totally ignored.
 
No one likes to be repeatedly whined at either, and yet, here we are.

quote:

There are still plenty of other fish in the sea so to speak, and I'm not sure I would want someone around that had treated me so poorly before they even knew me anyway.

Then why all the teenage angst?  Buck up soldier and get on with your life.  No one likes a Whiny Wendell so get out there and catch some of those other fish!

~stef



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 9:15:16 PM)

Common courtesy or political correctness?..no answer is an answer, as have been said time and again...as far as this particular person not responding to you,It has me wondering why you are giving them such power over you?..plus and has been said as well, you wrote this person, they did not write you..so hence..what is this persons obligation toward you?..do you respond to everyone ,either in this computer medium or even snail mail? and I am meaning all those people who send you mail wanting you to buy this or that?..I am thinking NO...sooooo, my opinion, do with it what you will....Tempting



juliaoceania -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 9:24:18 PM)

I will try to sincerely reply to your question, no there is no such thing as common courtesy over the internet because netiquette is different than real world interactions...

Let me find an analogous situation from the real world to the one that you posted here....

You go to a crowded bar with a loud live band. You go up to a strange woman, you ask her to dance, She walks away because there are several other men asking her to dance all at the same time and she does not want to take the time to respond to all of you that she is engaged.... is she rude? I would not think so. In fact men get shot down without a reply all the time in such situations. There are no "rules" that state anyone owes a stranger jack diddly squat



MsPoetress -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 10:19:54 PM)

I don't respond to half the emails I get.

If you cannot take the time to read my profile, then I wont waste my time responding back.

~poe



mgdartist -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 11:20:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterC70

I named no names, and the point is that I am a stranger just like everyone else here trying to find someone.

Not everyone here is trying to find someone.  Many already have their particular someone(s) and others are just here for the forums.

quote:

Also legitimate venting isn't whining.

Three posts on the same topic is whining.  The legitimacy of your whine is another matter entirely, especially since it's been done to death by your whiny predecessors.

quote:

 My point was that even a stranger deserves some courtesy from his/her peers.

Placing behavioral expectations upon complete strangers is incredibly presumptuous and could even be considered rude, but I'm going to wager that you hadn't considered that particular perspective.

quote:

You see this sort of thing everywhere online it seems.

It's a harsh world out there. 

quote:

 I figure if a person can come online and they have an active personal then they could at least show some courtesy toward their fellows.  No one likes to be totally ignored.
 
No one likes to be repeatedly whined at either, and yet, here we are.

quote:

There are still plenty of other fish in the sea so to speak, and I'm not sure I would want someone around that had treated me so poorly before they even knew me anyway.

Then why all the teenage angst?  Buck up soldier and get on with your life.  No one likes a Whiny Wendell so get out there and catch some of those other fish!

~stef


Pay her no mind my friend. she was similarly sweet and kind towards me earlier.  She's one of the dearest, kindest souls we have here at cm. except during this lunar phase perhaps.  edit~And how dare you forget that no answer IS an answer? This has already been established by all the sublime subs and others here. We're not to be expected to spoon feed you from this well known crock-of-shit. Thank you ever so much.

jeez methinks several here badly need to ease up a might bit.
MGD



Lordandmaster -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 11:25:50 PM)

Ain't no fucking courtesy in my neighbahood eitha.

But God DAMN the girls are waiting for the weather to get warmer.  You can see they're just itching to take their clothes off.

Ummm...what was this thread about again?

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterC70

I really have to wonder if common courtesy even exists online these days.



tetherboy -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 11:28:10 PM)

Master C,

I think I would agree that there is an abundant lack of common courtesy when it comes to online personals.  On more than one occasion, I have had absolutely no reply to some very well thought out letters that I have sent.  I try to follow up within a few weeks just to make sure that my letter didn't fall through the cracks.  Email does tend to get eaten by this particular server at times.    

When it happens, it's not the most pleasant thing but you learn not to put a great deal of faith in that sort of thing.  Call it being 'jaded', if you will.  Collarme has all kinds of people and they run the gamut of personalities, mental states, desires, and needs.  It's not even that uncommon for someone I may be chatting with to just up and disappear.  They pull their profile and just like that, they are gone.  Or make one 'wrong' statement and just like that, you are being ignored.    

Sometimes I think it's like being in a three-ring crazy circus.  And I'm talking whack-job crazy.  There was one that I have been speaking with for several years now and suddenly all of these things happen and it's like 'dust in the wind'.  Nothing you can do about it either - unless you let the status quo affect who you choose to be.    

My advice to you would be to approach each potential 'relationship' with a more nonchalant attitude.  If things don't work out.  It's cool.  And if they do work out, it's just icing on the cake.  

I think someone else summed it up pretty good when they referred to taking everything that happens here on collarme with a tablespoon of salt - I personally was thinking more along the lines of a salt lick.    

Good luck!

p.s.  edited to put in paragraph breaks since Netscape won't allow for such. :(



mgdartist -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 11:49:05 PM)

quote:

I personally was thinking more along the lines of a salt lick.


I think they were thinking more along the lines of some salt-peter.
lol

MGD



Real0ne -> RE: Is common courtesy dead online? (2/6/2007 11:59:45 PM)

like sense, neither is courtesy common now days



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