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RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 2:35:01 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
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i wish that i could honestly say that people would understand the difficulties involved in your situation and not jump to conclusions about your partner

but unfortunately much of the community actually are small minded and quickly judgemental, add to this that often Dominants are unwilloing to get past qa negative first impression and admit to being wrong

but my advice to you would be to forget the hood and be yourself and proud, screw everyone else and their misconceptions... if those with pasts of abuse are made to relive traumatic experiences when they see you in an adult situation, feel sympathy for them if you will, but they can turn their heads and look away

while it is important that everyone in a public dungeon is comfortable to practice their kink, it is also important that you are comfortable to practice yours... limiting or hiding yourself will do no one any good, and if their sensibilities are so fragile that they are shattered by seeing a lovely doll in adult situations, then perhaps they should reconsider their active involvement in the community; there are many activities that can bring about discomfort and trauma, and the ability to get through these feelings is integral to personal growth in and out of bdsm

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 2:42:42 PM   
alivingdoll


Posts: 57
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
Doctor Dubious -
       I'm sad to say I've only  met a few Turners women there's a huge suicide rate and depression rate among us and the next generation usually is aborted .I lend myself to newly pregnant women with a Turner + child so many just can't handle it and end up aborting even after i've done the I have the turners speech and i'm fine and what is it 50% who start hormone replacement early enough will gain height and possible breasts? just not fertility yet but medical science is amazing .I believe there's more of us out there just in hiding .   
ahh thanks for the coffee offer tisk tisk coffee stunt's your growth I don't drink it I do like tea though.

As for being kinky with Turners I have never found another I did find a kinky kleinfelters male once too bad we both liked to be spanked lol we would have fought over the hairbrush .
                                                       ~~~~~Doll

(in reply to DoctorDubious)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 2:45:31 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: alivingdoll

Doctor Dubious -
      I'm sad to say I've only  met a few Turners women there's a huge suicide rate and depression rate among us and the next generation usually is aborted .I lend myself to newly pregnant women with a Turner + child so many just can't handle it and end up aborting even after i've done the I have the turners speech and i'm fine and what is it 50% who start hormone replacement early enough will gain height and possible breasts? just not fertility yet but medical science is amazing .I believe there's more of us out there just in hiding .   
ahh thanks for the coffee offer tisk tisk coffee stunt's your growth I don't drink it I do like tea though.

As for being kinky with Turners I have never found another I did find a kinky kleinfelters male once too bad we both liked to be spanked lol we would have fought over the hairbrush .
                                                      ~~~~~Doll


alivingdoll "You take the hairbrush!"
kleinfeltersguy "No, you take it!"
alivingdoll "I had it last week!"
kleinfeltersguy "Did not!"

lather, rinse, repeat.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to alivingdoll)
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RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 3:06:40 PM   
alivingdoll


Posts: 57
Joined: 2/21/2007
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Simply Micheal-
         Here's a funny story -
see I have this fear of dentists more like a phobia really and my good friend let me use her son's dentist's, for children and maybe he didn't read my file . but it started out" if your a good girl you can pick a sticker ok" and I opened my mouth and he looked at me and said" your an adult I don't treat adult patient's " he had a great sense of humor and smiled and asked "where's Ashton i'm being punked lol" He wasn't my dentist after that but it was a fun experience i still have the phobia though .
  If I found myself single in the future I was thinking don't forget your mouth films lol to prove my age the whole ID thing can be faked now dental records can't be       ok sharing is over ~~~Doll

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 3:08:45 PM   
alivingdoll


Posts: 57
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
sinergy- 
           Now that was too funny that was an exercise in bladder control   ~~~~Doll

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 3:23:42 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
I'm so sorry that things been made so hard for you! I'm glad you have your special ID (and that you have no problem using it), but I can't believe someone would hold you responsible for something you can't do anything about. If triggering flashbacks comes up again, simply remind them that there isn't anything you can do short of killing yourself and that would probably add to people's trauma.

You have as much right as anyone else to be active and open in the BDSM community. My advice would be to have your ID on you at all times. The only concession I can see anyone asking you to make is to not do/wear anything that makes you appear more childlike while hanging out with a BDSM group as that, unfortantely, that could get the police interested.

I wish you the very best of luck! If you were in the area I'd encourage you to try and go to Purgatory as they've always seemed very reasonible, though it's a more of dance club/bdsm thing then just bdsm.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to alivingdoll)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 3:40:55 PM   
barefootgal


Posts: 44
Joined: 1/7/2007
From: Milwaukee, WI
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

quote:

ORIGINAL: alivingdoll

It was explained to me I disturb some members who have recovered from sexual abuse my image in these adult behaviors could lead to flashbacks so we learned to adapt .
                                                     thanks   ~~~Doll


Nicely said.

That is a lovely rationale, I guess. 

I am a bit shocked the person explaining it to you did not stop to think that he was making an adult person with a chromosomal anomaly responsible for the emotional issues of other people. 

Keep the faith, alivingdoll, people who have their brain in gear are out there.

You will find them.

Sinergy


(edited for clarification)

Sinergy -- nicely said.


< Message edited by barefootgal -- 2/21/2007 3:44:26 PM >


_____________________________

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(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 4:03:30 PM   
alivingdoll


Posts: 57
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
I want to answer everyone's replies and don't want to seem rude if I don't ,but my poor fingers ouch I'm not an expert typist (I know your shocked lol) and i'm so new to posting on here I'm the lurker. I might be doing it incorrectly if i am go ahead take me to task that's how i'll learn .
  I did want to add i'm amazed at the show of support if only you all were my community I do hope to have a community just like this all diverse opinions  I've been on here all day bad me you guy's are addicting and I was caught on here so Master was reading over my shoulder and just to let you know we both decided we will come out me unhooded the next social but before that he's going to get ahold of the club leader i'm using that for lack of a better word lol call a meeting we are paying members of this private club and have a sit down with all members and i'll host an open questions and answers and if it really does bother too many we will end our membership and he will demand a refund .
I hope i'm warmly surprised like I was here thanks too everyone with all your answers   wow a solution to the problem so fast i'll call you miracle workers .              a great first post and first day thank you  ~~~~Doll

(in reply to darchChylde)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 5:59:44 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
I think having a whole meeting for everyone and a Q&A is overboard and will actually cause more unsettling than necessary.  Let the leader of the group know and strongly suggest he let his staff for the night know, but otherwise, just go and be "just one of the gang"

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to alivingdoll)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 7:13:05 PM   
alivingdoll


Posts: 57
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
La-
  we like that idea even better, what we wanted to avoid was when I just presented myself other people leaving the club for whatever reason and of course other members complaining to dm's or whomever might be hosting  the gathering. 
That's why we thought the Q&A would serve the best interest of the whole group but I agree it could hinder my future acceptance also not too mention opening me up to alot of personal questions .Also can make me somewhat of a focus point bring unwanted attention when I don't have to do that .
                          thanks again ~~~~Doll

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 8:08:48 PM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I have a special ID that explains TS and even has my karytype my gene marker so it's not a fake ID situation .24hr #to call yes it's that bad lol
My point was why keep me in hiding doesn't that just make the people more curious?
  To join this type of club we went to an orientation and the speaker was like "you've got to be 18 dear " so I pulled out my special ID (i feel like a spy or super hero lol) and he shakes his head and was like OHHH boy this is going to be trouble cause during the meeting a few people were voicing their concerns "we let children in ? so the hood stopped the questions and made everyone comfortable thinking i was a little person(height challenged )vrs what I am .
It was explained to me I disturb some members who have recovered from sexual abuse my image in these adult behaviors could lead to flashbacks so we learned to adapt .


How unbelievably insensitive and boorishly rude can one person get? 
 
Doll, at no time should you EVER be forced to hide who you are.  If someone has a problem when they look upon you, that problem is all on them, and it has nothing whatsoever to do with you.  Lose the hoods, be proud of the woman you are, and ignore the idiots because they're not worthy of a second thought.  I don't know what group you joined up there, but know that in Indiana, the ALM group would welcome you and your Master with open arms.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: I'm curious others thought's on this - 2/21/2007 9:36:44 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: alivingdoll

I want to answer everyone's replies and don't want to seem rude if I don't ,but my poor fingers ouch I'm not an expert typist (I know your shocked lol) and i'm so new to posting on here I'm the lurker. I might be doing it incorrectly if i am go ahead take me to task that's how i'll learn .
I did want to add i'm amazed at the show of support if only you all were my community I do hope to have a community just like this all diverse opinions  I've been on here all day bad me you guy's are addicting and I was caught on here so Master was reading over my shoulder and just to let you know we both decided we will come out me unhooded the next social but before that he's going to get ahold of the club leader i'm using that for lack of a better word lol call a meeting we are paying members of this private club and have a sit down with all members and i'll host an open questions and answers and if it really does bother too many we will end our membership and he will demand a refund .
I hope i'm warmly surprised like I was here thanks too everyone with all your answers   wow a solution to the problem so fast i'll call you miracle workers .              a great first post and first day thank you  ~~~~Doll


Hello alivingdoll,

I hope the words I posted were of use to you.  I would reiterate that anybody who has problems with you and
your dynamic fails to understand that their problems are their problems, not yours.

julia and I wish you success and happiness in your future.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to alivingdoll)
Profile   Post #: 32
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