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RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 8:58:02 AM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSohun

Gaphoto,it has been my experience it takes awhile to find a good slave,in a previous board i have used it took me 6 months to develop a serious inquiry from a sub that was interested,my former slave actually encouraged me to use the interenet to fiind someone,now your experience is not uncommon i have had maybe three inquires in the space of a month.but you see im also seeking something specifiic,i actaully want to collar a new sub by mid summer that may be an artifical timetable i wont keep.i have had luck with boards like this,my attempts here are fairly new.i dont know how long you have been on but dont give up the ship quite yet,i know it probably frustrates you but it does take time


If it makes you both feel any better, while I had tons of mail pouring into my inbox, it took me 4 years to find the right One. Hang in there.

(in reply to MasterSohun)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 10:46:45 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		It may have something to do with your age sombody posted here about older or younger Doms and i would say about 75% said they like older Doms.  Don't give up though just keep reading and training and you will find her eventually. 

Matt's littleone

(in reply to temptressofsouls)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 10:51:13 AM   
MistressDarling


Posts: 31
Joined: 6/30/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with the young Dom comments. I prefer that my Owner be much older than I am. But there are girls who want someone closer to their age. Its so hard for anyone to find the right person for them. Keep trying though! Your match is out there!

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 1:43:45 PM   
GaPhoto


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline 		Everyone says that they dont want a younger Dom, why?  Is is because of immaturity, I know alot of my peers may be, but I am more mature for my age than alot of people.  Is it experience? I admit that I'm not experience, but I'm being trained by people who have been around for years.  I've seen 30+ yr old Doms who play a hell of alot worse than I do.  What reason is there for the bias against age?

Zack

(in reply to MistressDarling)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 1:48:13 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GaPhoto

Everyone says that they dont want a younger Dom, why?  Is is because of immaturity, I know alot of my peers may be, but I am more mature for my age than alot of people.  Is it experience? I admit that I'm not experience, but I'm being trained by people who have been around for years.  I've seen 30+ yr old Doms who play a hell of alot worse than I do.  What reason is there for the bias against age?

Zack



Go back and read my post on page 1. I explained several reasons why I don't want a young dom.


_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to GaPhoto)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 1:53:45 PM   
GaPhoto


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline 		What about the girls in their 20s who are still in college and the like? 

Zack

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 2:03:12 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GaPhoto

What about the girls in their 20s who are still in college and the like? 

Zack



Well I'm in my 20s (but not in college). Unfortunately the onus of being experienced and knowledgeable generally falls upon the dominant, because he's the "leader." An inexperienced sub just has to do what she's told in order to be safe...but an inexperienced dominant can be an accident waiting to happen. Kudos to you for being involved locally and trying to train with your mentors... I bet you'll be very very good when you're 30!

It takes a lot of life experience to become a good leader. You may be doing very well *for your age* but I'd bet you'll be a much better dominant in 20yrs than you are today!

Let me give you an analogy. I have horses. Lets say I have a colt that needs broke. Joe next door says he is a born natural with colts, and has been training with every name brand trainer in the country (John Lyons, Clinton Anderson, Pat Parelli, etc.) Let's say he's 20 and being training horses for 5yrs.. Now let's say Bob down the road is 60yrs old and been breaking 50 colts a year since he was 15yrs old Guess who I'm sending my horse too? The person with more real world experience!

It's the same when looking for a dominant. I want my dominant to be my "better" in every way or else I can't look up to him. He has to be more financially stable than I am (and I'm pretty darn stable), be smarter than me (IMO), be more knowledgeable, have better common sense, etc.

I simply don't trust a 20yr old to have those things. I remember being 20 and I've changed SOOOO much in the last 4yrs. I would expect that you will do the same as you find yourself. I want someone who has completed that "growing up" process.

Plus, most 20yr olds aren't ready to settle down and get married (some THINK they are, but most aren't.)

ETA: I'm also looking for a daddy/girl dynamic and calling a 20yr old guy daddy just doesn't work for me!


< Message edited by GeekyGirl -- 4/30/2007 2:08:27 PM >

_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to GaPhoto)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 3:05:32 PM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

ETA: I'm also looking for a daddy/girl dynamic and calling a 20yr old guy daddy just doesn't work for me!



Makes perfect sense but it still made me giggle. :)

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 3:06:12 PM   
sweetlady41only


Posts: 8
Joined: 12/3/2006
Status: offline 		Ga Photo,
Try editing your profile.  Change the beginning so what shows up when someone first opens the profile is NOT  a rant or in any way equivocal.

Cut out anything redundant (a Master doesn't have to say things more than once!); be sure nothing in it is contradictory ("I'm trying to upload a photo" when clearly you have been successful, at least with one.)

In your mails, this first "contact" has to be almost seductive.  You want your mind and heart and physicality to reach out to an unknown person and make her want to respond to you in writing...so say the good things succinctly; don't dwell on your age.  Maybe think about pursuing younger women or women just starting out regardless of age...you can learn together. 

Use your words wisely...tell "her" what you want HER to experience...how you want her to feel, to respond...draw a picture with your words but focus on what you two will ultimately have together.

Watch spelling and grammar.  Some of your words are not actually words (comfortability?  just use comfort).  You want to appeal to someone bright and articulate...so be that way yourself. 

Finally, i agree with those here who advised patience.  Finding someone for vanilla dating takes ages; adding D/s into the mix really makes finding that elusive "right partner" even harder.  It will be worth the wait.

Wishing you success!
sweet 

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 3:17:17 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Age is not always a factor.  Putting across the image that you can be a Dom at your age is the big thing. In your profile and your initial contacts, you have to make sure there is nothing but confidence coming across.  If you do not come across as strong, then they are unlikely to overlook the age and give you a chance. Most women like older men, vanilla and lifestyle. There are some of us who prefer ours younger, but in order for a Dominant person to be able to control someone older than themselves, they ahve to be strong enough to do so.  That strength of character and the resolution to make what you want yours without question is what a prosepctive sub will want to see. Make yourself wound irrisistable and you will be.  Being irrisistable doesnt mean self centered, but take an interest in what they might be interested in that you would share. Make it sound like you really do want to know, and see where it goes.  Dont push to possess them right off, that usualy works against you. Make it obvious, though, that if you want something or someone you are wiling to put the effort into getting and keeping them. 

Feel free to PM me if you have any other questions :)
DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to sweetlady41only)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 9:14:39 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		You have only been on this site for 2 months..others years!..PATIENCE..lack thereof shows immaturity...Tempting

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 9:22:32 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline 		I like your profile!  It's well written, contains references to non kinky interests and a real life, and gives the impression of a real human being with some thought and intelligence.  If you were in my area, and of my orientation, I would definitely have dropped you a note.  Actually if you were in my area I'd have dropped you a note anyway to invite you to our 7th Sea roleplaying group.  ;)

(in reply to GaPhoto)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What am I doing wrong? - 4/30/2007 10:18:40 PM   
Casie


Posts: 450
Joined: 1/5/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with what others have said IE age, the first paragraph in your profile ext. But also this post is gonna make you look desprate which I'm sure won't help.

(in reply to GaPhoto)
Profile   Post #: 33
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