RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a response)

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/24/2007 2:23:24 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NajakcharmerDude. You rock. This post ought to be required reading for guysubs.

LOL. How about little sarbon, politesub, aidan and chia plus start a club for subs - yall could do sub to wannabe sub orientations and round table educational gatherings in the tree house. You could have a club sub pledge and hand signal. Maybe even a special outfit! Den Dommes could award badges earned once a subbie skill is mastered. Smiling at the thought of it... Sigh.

< Message edited by ocilla -- 6/24/2007 2:34:25 PM >

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/24/2007 2:45:08 PM

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This is a very good posting. I can relate to giving her too much information all at once. I try to develop the relationship too fast before.
I found out that she needs time to get to know me. I feel that if she really wants to get to know me, I will have opportunities to talk to her again.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/24/2007 8:28:09 PM

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Oh my, that was excellent, and very very helpful littlesarbonn. I never even noticed you before and now I'm in awe. *takes notes*

(in reply to KaramelGoddess)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/24/2007 10:08:14 PM

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Beautiful. I hope you don't mind if I use your post on my personal website. I will be more than happy to give you the credit for it. *s* Great post and very well thought out observations.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/24/2007 10:20:24 PM

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Very well said. Kudos.

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 6/25/2007 1:59:19 AM

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I'm joining in the standing ovation here - and I will also be making this, appropriately credited, mandatory reading for would-be subs, along with LadyHeart's addition. So frustrating when all seems to be going well and then they're a no show! Unreliability is a real killer for My interest!

So, where do you live again sarbonn? *grin*

Maam Jay

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 4:18:07 PM

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quote:

a

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Dear littlesarbonn,

Thank you so much for taking the time to share such excellent thoughts and
guidance. This is food wrought of genuine substance for a submissive in the
throws of trying to "figure it all out". i shall indeed be looking for more of
your generous sharing of understanding and experience, as i am a boy with
a voracious appetite for learning. Thank you again, i am better for your words.

Respectfully, chia* (the pet)

geeezus i looked at the avatar and started reading to see what i may have said in this of all threads and pinched myself before realizing that someone else has the same avatar as i do LOL

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 5:07:52 PM

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note to self:

never mention how good you are at recieving oral sex *check*

stalking is bad *check*

look up "dilution" *check*

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 5:16:16 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

note to self:

never mention how good you are at recieving oral sex *check*

stalking is bad *check*

look up "dilution" *check*

darchChylde, i am having fits here imagining saying " Mistress i`m very good at receiving oral sex. If needed You could do it for days and weeks and i promise NEVER to complain "

Edits to add i slightly misread your post but liked the idea i came up with.....

< Message edited by Politesub53 -- 7/10/2007 5:18:39 PM >

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 5:16:31 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

note to self:

never mention how good you are at recieving oral sex *check* Why not?

stalking is bad *check* Says you *ducks back into bushes*

look up "dilution" *check* HAHAHA

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 5:59:08 PM

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Ditto the kudos. Extremely well said. Lots of good, practical, common sense advice.

Can i add a couple of suggestions to your list of "don'ts"?

- Don't go for the crotch. Sending a Woman an entirely sexual email is the quickest way to get your letter deleted. I've noticed that when Women write it's usually more on a "get to know you" basis, trying to find out if you have any common ground. Guys have a tendency to think with the little head first, and launch right into a discussion of how turned on they get wearing plastic diapers and rubber booties (or whatever) and it can be a surefire way to turn a Woman off.

- Don't send a 1-liner email. Another quick way to get tossed in the trash. One liners = no brainers. If you've spent all of 10 seconds constructing your approach, more than likely she is going to spend an equal amount of time flushing your note down the toilet. This may seem pretty basic, but i get the feeling a lot of guys still do this.

Here are two suggestion for the "do" list...

- Be a gentleman. Many years ago I asked a Woman what kind of men she liked. She replied, "Gentlemen." Old fashioned chivalry, like opening doors, picking up the tab, arriving with flowers, writing her poetry, throwing your cloak over a puddle... all of these actions show her that you care, that you're thinking about her, and that it's not all about you.

- Follow her lead. Or to turn it around, don't try to lead. Consider your communication like dancing. Show interest in getting together, but ultimately it is up to her to determne the time and the place. She has to feel comfortable. Don't try to be pushy or overly aggressive. This can be difficult, because a Woman wants to know that you're interested in her - but she doesn't want to feel you're trying to take control. Try to strike a delicate balance of letting her know you're available and ready to serve her when She feels comfortable.

Anyway, those were just some random thoughts.

< Message edited by DSwriter -- 7/10/2007 6:01:03 PM >

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 6:06:57 PM

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Alot of those suggestions are good in general. Can be turned around to include both submissive genders. (Although most female submissives,even if they are thinking with their hormones, usually don't admit it, and can at least pretend to think around it.) **grins**

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 8:34:21 PM

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I just wanted to add in mine as well. Very well said. *s*

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 10:27:29 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Trampler

Alot of those suggestions are good in general. Can be turned around to include both submissive genders.

Agreed.

Was just trying to add something to conversation, but probably have no right to piggy-back onto Lil's wonderful note. As my most recent history will bear out, I am far from a "master" at this sort of a thing, and should add another "don't."

Don't appear to know it all. You don't.

(in reply to Trampler)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 10:38:41 PM

imthatacheyouhav

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sarbonn...you dear man...seriuosly...copywrite this...NOW!....
this was stunning.

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/10/2007 11:26:20 PM

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Although the OP's post is very well written and detailed I'm surprised to hear that guys are still pulling stuff like that considering it all seemed to be common sense stuff to me (aka not mailing genital pics to women - huh!?!).

The only item I've found some difference in for my experiences is the "real person" one since I've found a lot of women I've served were looking for a slave and not a friend and although it's good not to go overboard on the "The earth should revolve around you Goddess" type stuff it's also important to remember whose the top and whose the bottom in the dynamic (aka even when she is wearing fluffy slippers to still sit at her feet when allowed and not plop down next to her on the couch like you're one of her "buddies").

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/11/2007 2:05:32 AM

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Sarbonn,
This is one of the most brilliant and useful posts I've ever seen on these boards.

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/11/2007 2:32:44 AM

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I am going to add my appreciation. I can see the effort you have put into this and the mindfulness to make the BDSM world a little better of a place for the Dominants. I thank you for your time, consideration and eloquence.
Happy searching
Ms Alizbeth

(in reply to KaramelGoddess)

RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/11/2007 5:09:52 AM

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Sarbon ...excellant post ... I can only add to what others have said.

We should all be so lucky as to encounter a submissive that thinks before acting as you do and one willing to do what it takes to find what they need as well as insure they will be interesting to the potential Dominant.

Well said and well done. You are a jewel.

PS some of the other posts added excellant ideas too and a few made me laff and choke on my morning coffee

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RE: What can a sub have to offer a dominant woman (a re... - 7/11/2007 7:51:43 AM

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Thanks all again. Not even sure how this got resurrected again. Usually my posts make it about a day and then disappear faster than a Jessica Power thread.

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