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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 12:06:27 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Awwww BoiJen!  Maybe one day.... But then I am sure you look pretty whatever you do and it might be nicer to have you doing something! lol

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 12:09:29 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: yesiwillgladly

Laziness.  Hmmmm.   Would a Mistress and a 24/7 get me out of laziness?
What are some other ways to not be lazy in the lifestyle?
The laziness is only away from work.


Ask yourself if she actually WANT'S to mother someone who can't muster the effort to get off their butt.


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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 1:56:49 PM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		You havent said weather you HAVE a DOMME or not and everyone may not agree with me  but oh well.I think as a Domme that I do have a responsibilty to see that my sub does not get "lazy" and if that requires me having to think up a list of things for him to do,loaning him to friends, or even doing some community work,if I'm not able to make a sub feel worn out yet happy at the end of his day and yet yearning for tomorrow to get up and do more to please me then maybe I need to take a look at myself.Hope this answer helps.

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 2:00:13 PM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		If all that doesnt work then maybe ignoring him/her will work before total dismissing.

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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 2:07:23 PM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		I also think Locket said it well,if he wants to be lazy let him stand in a corner and do nothing for 4 hours a day without moving and see if he snaps out of that but over all it would have to be worth it.This is starting to sound like some teenage kid whos parent told him he is lazy and he doesnt know what it is or how to do anything different before they take his puter away!! LOL

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 4:30:30 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: yesiwillgladly

Andalusite:   That is very true.  It makes me feel approved.

Um, I don't approve of what you're doing at all, and I certainly wouldn't want to be with you! I'm just saying that realising you have a problem is good, but you need to be the one to work on it, at least on this particular one, before anyone's going to want to date you or be in a D/s relationship with you.

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 8:55:48 PM   
yesiwillgladly


Posts: 29
Joined: 3/28/2009
Status: offline 		Princess Donna,

Where did Lockit say standing in a corner for four hours without moving?

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 9:07:44 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		This conversation is confusing me.  What does "lazy" mean?  Sitting around doing "nothing," I suppose.  But... what "nothing" is getting done?  Hours of bad TV?  Extensive research of internet porn?  I doubt the OP is working for eight hours, and sleeping the other sixteen.

What are your goals in life, yesiwillgladly?  If you died tomorrow, what would you want on your tombstone?  What kind of future do you want to build?  And.... what is a description of your typical day?  How do you use your time?

Finally, do you see a contradiction between what you believe in, and what you do?  If so, what is it?  And why do you think it is there?


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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 9:17:07 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		RedMagic,

He mentioned in one of his other posts (and I'm only paraphrasing here) that he cleans his place when he is expecting company, but otherwise doesn't find the motivation to do such.  So, I imagine a guy who comes home from work, grabs a drink, and something to eat, sits in front of the computer or television and does not much else.  His drink glass from last year is probably still on the coffee table if he can even see the coffee table.  That is the impression I get from his words.  Okay, perhaps a bit exaggerated, but I do foresee loads of laundry piling up, dishes in the sink, trash that hasn't been taken out regularly and other things that likely need tending to.  I only picture him cleaning that stuff up if he is expecting company.  Personally, I can see him sitting in front of a web cam in his bedroom with piles of clothes on the floor while trying to convince a domina that he would make certain her clothes were put away neatly, ironed, and smelling fabulous on a consistant basis so long as she wore her thigh high boots and had a crop in her hand to insist it was done.  (insert eye roll here)

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 11:17:20 PM   
AlexandraLynch


Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline 		It is certainly possible for external forces to supply motivation that we do not have internally. I can think of many possible examples.

However, like many dominants, the reason I want to work a slave in my home is because I want things to get done as a nice side benefit to bossing someone about. Do I expect a learning curve? Sure. Do I expect learning? You betcha. I am not doing all the work here.

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RE: laziness: how to get a sub to not be lazy; does it ... - 4/7/2009 11:30:37 PM   
LAgirlsub


Posts: 158
Joined: 3/16/2009
Status: offline 		Although I'm not a dom woman (a subbie women here), the last thing OP I would be is lazy. I'd be so excited to be with a sexy dom who wanted to play with me and with a mutual attraction, I'd have to be careful to express things I might want/need (hopefully with good communication between us) because I'd have so much fun trying to please her.

So OP, when I read 'lazy' I actually thought something else - I thought selfish. If it's not a physical situation (diet, nutrition, work stress and all the rest), then to me you sound selfish. You want someone else to do what you are not willing to do. And you don't get it that even if it's a bdsm relationship (and darn I'm only guessing since I haven't experienced one yet) it's not a one-way street even if you mistakenly think it is because she's dominant. Even if that's the dynamic, I look at a relationship as mutual and you need to give/be active in the relationship like any other.

So are you 'lazy' in all your relationships? And you think because it's bdsm, that some strong woman will have any interest in a selfish sub or slave? I wouldn't like that in a dom, just like I know I don't want a cold dom who isn't interested in knowing me. Learning about this lifestyle a little, I realize that's a hard limit for me - I want a dom who is emotionally open since I don't think I'm capable of being open and trusting in how I'd need to be without that.

So if you are actually open to growing...you need to look at your selfishness not just your lazy nature. And do not approach some dom at this time. You are not ready to meet someone. Sure, if you want to pay a professional for some time do that. But I sincerely doubt you'll find a quality dom woman who would want to deal with selfishness and laziness.

PS: I love Portland Oregon. If only you didn't have to grow gills to live there...

< Message edited by LAgirlsub -- 4/7/2009 11:32:27 PM >

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 51
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