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"...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 5:58:09 PM

xiam

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In another thread, janiebelle said: "...being asked 'what do you like to do sexually?' is tough. And I likewise see how answering 'doing whatever pleases you, and doing it well' is not quite the hot little tidbit he was after."

So, if "i like what You like" is your honest inclination, how does one come up with the juicy tidbit that your partner would rather hear?

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 6:03:04 PM

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I'm most sure that "coming up with" some "juicy tidbit" is certainly NOT what Master would want to hear. If He asks me what I like, He expects me to answer honestly, not fabricate something juicy that I think He might rather hear.

The only "rough" patches we've ever gone through sexually/play-wise have been when I acted in a way that wasn't my natural inclination. The most famous incident of this was when I held in all reactions to the pain I was feeling and tried to be tough and stoic because I THOUGHT that's what He wanted. It was the worst experience we've ever had together.

To me, creating something "juicy" to tell Him because I think that's what He wants would be just as bad. I'll let Him decide what He wants and I'll answer His questions honestly in the knowledge that if He didn't want to know, He certainly wouldn't ask. And oh, I assure you, my honest answers are as juicy as anything anyone could dream up

luci

< Message edited by slaveluci -- 6/28/2009 6:04:31 PM >

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(in reply to xiam)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 6:12:28 PM

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Never been a problem for me, whilst the "I like what you like" bit is true, I still have my own little fantasies which whoever I'm with may or may not choose to fulfill.
But if your only answer is whatever pleases him, then you must still have a decent enough idea of what pleases him which you could get graphic enough about?

(in reply to slaveluci)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 7:24:04 PM

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There's a possibility that he's a wanker looking to get off on your answer.

If not, then your answer is fine. The only wrong answer is, "I love to get spanked fourteen times on the left cheek and twelve times on the right cheek with a lacquered birch paddle while my tits are tied with a fifteen foot length of sisal rope..."

I make a lousy service top.

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RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 7:41:48 PM

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quote:

If not, then your answer is fine. The only wrong answer is, "I love to get spanked fourteen times on the left cheek and twelve times on the right cheek with a lacquered birch paddle while my tits are tied with a fifteen foot length of sisal rope..."

Damn! There goes THAT fantasy

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RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 7:47:15 PM

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quote:

...So, if "i like what You like" is your honest inclination, how does one come up with the juicy tidbit that your partner would rather hear?...

personally, 6 1/2 years ago this slave stopped engaging in partnerships with folks who have some kind of issue with/can't comprehend that "i like what you like" translates into submitting to a partner's desires IS what this slave likes to do sexually...it is how she is wired...it's what gets her hot and bothered.

if they couldn't run with that, then this slave had no interest in passing them the ball.

(in reply to xiam)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 7:56:53 PM

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When I've been asked that I usually tell them I like to be dominated and that my sexual inclinations are dependent on my connection with the other person. What I like with one person may be different with another but the core of my interest is being dominated, being ruled. Everything else is based around that.

After that the details are in getting to know one another and seeing where our interactions lead together.

If they weren't satisfied with that answer it told me one thing about them..they were just looking for some quick action, a romp in the hay and not at all what I was interested in and it was an easy way to shut the door and move on to the next.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 10:49:25 PM

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Well shit Steven. Now I'm feeling ashamed of my fantasy.

lol.

The juiciest response is the most honest response. If He's asking me a question, i will always give Him honesty. 9.5 times out of 10, my own desires are simply to give Him what He desires. That is enough for me. And if He is not aroused by my simple willing/eagerness to please Him, then perhaps W/we're not in the right relationship.

If i want to mix it up a little, I would throw in a few naughty requests of my own. But even then, they'd be designed to please Him. (i.e. fuck my mouth)

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RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/28/2009 11:40:23 PM

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Whenever my Daddy asks me what I like...I tell Him honestly. He likes to hear that I love what I do, because I like doing it for Him. He knows that im extremely submissive and will do anything just to please Him, but what makes Him most happy is that I'm honest and tell Him the things I enjoy about playtime or any time we're serious with each other. I'm new to this lifestyle, therefore everything I've liked and loved have formed from my Daddy's interests, so I enjoy everything my Daddy does, and love doing them for Him [:

(in reply to littlewonder)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 12:37:26 AM

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Before I had some real-time experience on the scene I thought my desire to simply do whatever pleased my dominant would be an asset, but it's amazing how many people really, really do not like hearing that and think you're somehow unimaginative or worse, stubbornly hiding something from them.

It's certainly not altruism or coyness on my part. The thing is, while what turns me ON is variable other than the being-dominated part, a "service top" scenario where I'm directing the goings-on is truly a massive turn-off.

Of course, I'm terrible at role-play and more so at guessing at things my dom might want to hear, so I my answer is I simply tell the truth - my biggest pleasure is theirs. Perhaps a good addendum would be "and them knowing what it is that they want, and it somehow involving me".

< Message edited by WestBaySlave -- 6/29/2009 12:39:41 AM >

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 4:21:22 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave

Before I had some real-time experience on the scene I thought my desire to simply do whatever pleased my dominant would be an asset, but it's amazing how many people really, really do not like hearing that and think you're somehow unimaginative or worse, stubbornly hiding something from them.

It's certainly not altruism or coyness on my part. The thing is, while what turns me ON is variable other than the being-dominated part, a "service top" scenario where I'm directing the goings-on is truly a massive turn-off.

Of course, I'm terrible at role-play and more so at guessing at things my dom might want to hear, so I my answer is I simply tell the truth - my biggest pleasure is theirs. Perhaps a good addendum would be "and them knowing what it is that they want, and it somehow involving me".

That's pretty much it for me.
Like beth and littlewonder...I like to be dominated. But from there, it is pretty much in their hands, or it wouldn't be them who was dominating.
There is also the difference between "what do you like" and "tell me your darkest fantasy". Those two questions are likely to have two very different answers.
j

(in reply to WestBaySlave)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 4:44:56 AM

vasha

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communicatoin: full disclosure is important. so is absolute and complete honesty. even in this, yes. ok, you wana please him/her by cartering to their specific tastes.. good idea, wrong applicatoin. in this case. ok, its ... sometimes hard to talk about some things. but its nessasary. espcially in lifestyle.
example- was ... more imbarassing then i can relate when i told my Ma'am how the porn ild seen aroused me.. and why. (dont think i want to get into specifics, because its Still embarassing. and rather personal. not publicly anyway) You know what, she may make this happen. in one way or another... depending.

the point of this is that the other very well may get aroused by your arousal, and the method doesnt matter. its emotional... a kind of empathy that two people close to one another can share. and its awesome when it works. or it can be. :)

(in reply to janiebelle)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 7:35:17 AM

xiam

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quote:

ORIGINAL: janiebelle
...There is also the difference between "what do you like" and "tell me your darkest fantasy". Those two questions are likely to have two very different answers.

ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave
...I thought my desire to simply do whatever pleased my dominant would be an asset, but it's amazing how many people really, really do not like hearing that and think you're somehow unimaginative or worse, stubbornly hiding something from them. It's certainly not altruism or coyness on my part....

True, true! I honestly get off on being pleasing and adapting that to my partner's definition. (ie, xxxx might have been okay in the past but is mind blowing with you, and of course, the opposite can hold true as well.)

I'm pretty open minded aside from a few limits which i have no problem disclosing, and i think it is great fun to discover where the particular dynamic might take us within those parameters and a shared fantasy or two.

(in reply to janiebelle)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 10:00:38 AM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: xiam

In another thread, janiebelle said: "...being asked 'what do you like to do sexually?' is tough. And I likewise see how answering 'doing whatever pleases you, and doing it well' is not quite the hot little tidbit he was after."

So, if "i like what You like" is your honest inclination, how does one come up with the juicy tidbit that your partner would rather hear?

Inside my relationship it's understood that anything that is likely to take place is going to arouse me. Some things are just better *discovered*.

A question of that kind just raises a lot of OTHER questions for me, to launch into any answers, unless it's one of those meandering conversations that isn't necessarily *going anywhere*.

It'd be like saying *I like being fisted*......I get enjoyment, satisfaction and all sorts of weird offshoot feelings from that occuring with HIM...... but I would NEVER say or assert that *I like being fisted*.

The only thing that I am CERTAIN that I enjoy sexually..is masturbating. Other than that it depends completely on who I'm with and what they mean to me. Everything and anything I find amazing with him wouldn't correspond to a universal * *like*.

If I was being asked what I'd like to experience, sexually, with HIM........ then he'd get an answer corresponding to that.

That kind of question is too vague and too wide to elicit any response from me, outside of my relationship.

agirl

(in reply to xiam)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 12:20:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: xiam

In another thread, janiebelle said: "...being asked 'what do you like to do sexually?' is tough. And I likewise see how answering 'doing whatever pleases you, and doing it well' is not quite the hot little tidbit he was after."

So, if "i like what You like" is your honest inclination, how does one come up with the juicy tidbit that your partner would rather hear?

For me this amounts to transparency - yes - i do very much like what He likes, but if i'm specifically asked what i like that translates to me to mean, "I want to know what turns you on", or "I want to know how you experience or feel about what I do to you". It's all about something we call transparency where i am not permitted to keep my feelings, thoughts, desires to myself as my own. They all belong to Him.

< Message edited by maia09 -- 6/29/2009 12:21:40 PM >

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(in reply to xiam)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 12:29:23 PM

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From: DC Metro area
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quote:

ORIGINAL: xiam

In another thread, janiebelle said: "...being asked 'what do you like to do sexually?' is tough. And I likewise see how answering 'doing whatever pleases you, and doing it well' is not quite the hot little tidbit he was after."

So, if "i like what You like" is your honest inclination, how does one come up with the juicy tidbit that your partner would rather hear?

as i stated in the other thread, i have no idea! that's my big problem right now. i have no special "hot" buttons, i have no specific list of turn-ons, i have never even thought of sex taking my own physical pleasure into consideration. also unlike many, i am not automatically aroused just because i am pleasing someone else (nor would my Master want me to be)...i may or may not be, it is all a thing of chance and doesn't seem to have much relation to any specific activities.

so in my situation, how does one answer the question "what do you like? what do you want?"...i really wish someone would tell me, lol.

(in reply to xiam)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 1:17:37 PM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

as i stated in the other thread, i have no idea! that's my big problem right now. i have no special "hot" buttons, i have no specific list of turn-ons, i have never even thought of sex taking my own physical pleasure into consideration. also unlike many, i am not automatically aroused just because i am pleasing someone else (nor would my Master want me to be)...i may or may not be, it is all a thing of chance and doesn't seem to have much relation to any specific activities.

so in my situation, how does one answer the question "what do you like? what do you want?"...i really wish someone would tell me, lol.

With...." I promise faithfully to let you know the moment I know myself " ...lol

agirl

(in reply to daddysprop247)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/29/2009 1:49:08 PM

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Well it is true i like everything Master likes. That being said there are some things that i really like that get me hot. After over 3 years Master knows what buttons to push. If he asked me when we were first getting to know each other i would have answered him honestly. Telling him what you think he wants to hear, served no purpose. I would guess they are asking cause they want to know what gets you hot. In my relationship if he does those things or not it is up to him.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to agirl)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/30/2009 8:23:29 AM

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While I was still looking, I explained to the toppy-type ones that I'm less focused on the toy (though as a bottom or submissive, some do feel better than others), and more on playstyle, how hard they're using it, how I feel about them, and how turned on they are. I told the bottomy-type ones that I enjoy making them scream, whimper, cry, yelp, and squirm, and am more focused on their reactions than on the specific tool I'm using on them. There are other non-pain-oriented things that I can really enjoy or that I'm not willing to do at all, depending on their mindset. For example, helping a man cross-dress can be fun, but it's more of a pampering mood, or a pajama party, or some such, like helping a female friend pick out clothes/makeup/etc. "Forced" feminisation with verbal humiliation isn't my style. Nobody seemed confused about it! They sometimes did ask about more specific past experiences/examples, though.

(in reply to littleone35)

RE: "...I like what You like..." - 6/30/2009 8:25:48 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

There's a possibility that he's a wanker looking to get off on your answer.

If not, then your answer is fine. The only wrong answer is, "I love to get spanked fourteen times on the left cheek and twelve times on the right cheek with a lacquered birch paddle while my tits are tied with a fifteen foot length of sisal rope..."

i said a twelve foot rope, Steven.

I wish to hell you would pay attention

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