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RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 7:29:44 PM

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

quote:

Wanna know what I don't get? How men who claim to be all about loving women, have no clue how to approach/talk to/treat women.

It's not that men don't know how to socially interact, it's just that women such as your self have ridiculous standards. Maybe you should consider not making it purposely hard for men to get your attention and act like an adult instead of an uppity narcissist who believes men are below you.

If you mean that expecting grown men to communicate clearly in writing, follow up, pay attention to profiles, take time to write their own profiles that are not kink focused and to generally behave with finesse, then absolutely, women should continue to purposely make it hard for men to get our attention.

And it is not being an uppity narcissist, it is being selective.

(in reply to naughtynick81)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 7:30:46 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

quote:

Wanna know what I don't get? How men who claim to be all about loving women, have no clue how to approach/talk to/treat women.

It's not that men don't know how to socially interact, it's just that women such as your self have ridiculous standards. Maybe you should consider not making it purposely hard for men to get your attention and act like an adult instead of an uppity narcissist who believes men are below you.

Mebbe she just feels that you are below her, not all men.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to naughtynick81)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 7:50:25 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

If you mean that expecting grown men to communicate clearly in writing, follow up, pay attention to profiles, take time to write their own profiles that are not kink focused and to generally behave with finesse, then absolutely, women should continue to purposely make it hard for men to get our attention.

And it is not being an uppity narcissist, it is being selective.

Indeed Guys ... this advice WORKS! LMAO

Don't know why I have to say it, either!

Thanks sexyred1 for trying to enlighten the primitive men!

PS: again I love you guys .. because you make it SO EASY for me!

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 8:21:38 PM

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If having standards about how I'm treated makes me a stuck up bitch, I am soooooo ok with that. Take that over ending up with jerks who don't respect my boundaries or men who just want to use me as a fantasy object any day. Honestly Nick, the more you hate on me the more I feel I'm doing a fantastic job of avoiding men like you. Makes me all tingly :)

(in reply to naughtynick81)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 8:26:51 PM

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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There's a limit to what you can put or should put in a profile. I read a few of them and no one seems to say they want a stupid, boring, unsuccessful, jerk who owes child support or made some criminal complaints against their exes. Most people seem to describe themselves as smart, fun, etc.

Bad grammar doesn't help but people do have typos and that shouldn't be a deal breaker. I think it was Jon Lovitz who said if women really wanted a guy with a sense of humor he would have been going on a lot more dates. One thing I don't understand is that women always say they want a man who is "confident." What does that mean exactly?

I am getting tired of this site and looking for alternatives but there aren't any better options if you are looking for what it is that we do. No everyone can't post a picture or go to a munch because they are in the closet not because they are secretly married and cheating. Here's my advice to people posting pictures, don't put up anything you don't want to show up on the front page of the newspaper or have to explain in court if you are trying to get custody of your kids. A woman I was with once said she was afraid her ex would hire an investigator and had to be careful.

To me the point is to put in the basics in your profile. Yes, I understand women get tons of mail but at some point if a guy writes you something more than two paragraphs it's depressing if it gets deleted unread, if you never respond, if you respond then you decide never to log on and reply to a follow up email, or if you secretly read it by hovering over it and act like its unread.

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/29/2012 11:54:33 PM

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From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL:
It's not that men don't know how to socially interact, it's just that women such as your self have ridiculous standards. Maybe you should consider not making it purposely hard for men to get your attention and act like an adult instead of an uppity narcissist who believes men are below you.

Rut roh, sounds like someone has the Whaaaaambulance on speed dial

(in reply to naughtynick81)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/30/2012 5:42:32 AM

Posts: 49
Joined: 11/4/2012
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Very easy really

Put some information on your profile about you rather then just having a long wish list. I am usually polite and respond to anyone who contacts me, but when faced with a blank profile, people are simply not going to waste their time replying to you.

Zara

(in reply to naughtynick81)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/30/2012 6:22:18 AM

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From: Middle River, MD
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quote:

ORIGINAL: focalss

No everyone can't post a picture or go to a munch because they are in the closet not because they are secretly married and cheating.

I agree there are tons of legitimate reasons someone does not post a picture beyond being married or cheating. However, I will say that simply emailing someone pictures privately doesn't give your much more protection IMO. Not all private photos stay private.

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(in reply to focalss)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/30/2012 12:45:08 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Talon67
I realy dont get it. I put myself out there and message people that could be a possible Mistress and make sure to youse proper grammer, but I never get anything back. Its depressing. So I guess what I'm asking is, why?

Talon67,
First of all, your profile says absolutely nothing about you other than having a bunch of fetishes listed on the left side. I know I pass profiles like that right by. Also, in your post here you misspelled "use" and "grammar," equally unimpressive.

quote:

ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

quote:

Wanna know what I don't get? How men who claim to be all about loving women, have no clue how to approach/talk to/treat women.

It's not that men don't know how to socially interact, it's just that women such as your self have ridiculous standards. Maybe you should consider not making it purposely hard for men to get your attention and act like an adult instead of an uppity narcissist who believes men are below you.

Naughtynick81,
I've noticed in a lot of your posts on threads lately that you are, how should I say this? You seem to be spitting venom toward women. I'm sorry you feel that way, as not all of us are negative bitches as you seem to think. Some of us are actually nice people.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to Talon67)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 6:09:27 AM

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Joined: 6/19/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Talon67

I realy dont get it. I put myself out there and message people that could be a possible Mistress and make sure to youse proper grammer, but I never get anything back. Its depressing. So I guess what I'm asking is, why?

You youse proper grammer but do you spell check? Perhaps that is important to them also. It's also possible that the lack of a profile is putting them off.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to Talon67)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 6:27:16 AM

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Joined: 1/15/2012
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I don't get it. Mark Im the oppisite of you. I have to many women who want me. What do I have to do to keep them away.

Steven don't answer that.

(in reply to thishereboi)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 6:54:25 AM

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: r1a2y3m4o5n6d7

Steven don't answer that.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to r1a2y3m4o5n6d7)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 9:33:15 AM

StefanandLucinda

Posts: 27
Joined: 11/27/2012
Status: offline

Wow! Some of the replies you received are so... just not applicable to the OP or nit picky or meanspirited. Who really cares if your grammer if not the best? Who cares if your profile does not contain a 1000 word essay all about you? Ignore those. You DO have pics up and basic info on things you like. You have a face photo up, which is more than most of the people here. You clearly state that you are a man. Many "women" here are men using photos of someone else of the female gender they found somewhere. Remember that. You seem honest and real to me.

Try to find a few Mistresses that you truly feel a connection to through their profile and make an effort to get to know them. I would also encourage you to attend some local events and try to find someone real. Fetlife is awesome for locating cool happenings near you.

The best things in life are really worth waiting for. Be patient and thoughtful about who you send mail to. Your future mistress will appreciate the fact that you haven't shared yourself with every female who looks your way.

Best wishes for a happy and healthy 2013.

Lucinda

(in reply to DarkSteven)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 9:46:50 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

Lucinda - he wanted to know why he wasn't getting replies and people told him why they thought that was. Who cares about his grammar or having some info on his profile? Well apparently his target audience care, hence all the replies to that end. If everyone just sits around and tells him 'gosh poor you, that sounds unfair' it won't actually help him achieve his goals. I think people were pretty nice.

I agree with your advice about getting out there in person and being selective about who he mails. But it really is true that single female dominants get bombarded with mail, so no matter how lovely he is on the inside, he needs to sell himself if he wants a shot at getting to know people on this site.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to StefanandLucinda)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:01:21 AM

StefanandLucinda

Posts: 27
Joined: 11/27/2012
Status: offline

Hello Athena. Love your mask! I personally cannot relate to how perfect grammer is a required skill a slave must have and equates to an automatic no reply. Apparently, it is to some. I guess everyone has their quirks.

Lucinda

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:18:34 AM

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Joined: 11/13/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: StefanandLucinda

Hello Athena. Love your mask! I personally cannot relate to how perfect grammer is a required skill a slave must have and equates to an automatic no reply. Apparently, it is to some. I guess everyone has their quirks.

Lucinda

It's not about perfect. It's about the unattractiveness of a message that reads "hi u r hot wanna chat"

Really? Can you not spell, or do you just not care enough to put the effort into it? Either way, my standards have not been met.

< Message edited by Baroana -- 12/31/2012 10:19:19 AM >

(in reply to StefanandLucinda)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:27:03 AM

TheBoyDownBelow

Posts: 83
Joined: 7/25/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroana

It's about the unattractiveness of a message that reads "hi u r hot wanna chat"

Your example does not meet any standard, which the least of it is spelling! LOL

(in reply to Baroana)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:32:04 AM

Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheBoyDownBelow

quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroana

It's about the unattractiveness of a message that reads "hi u r hot wanna chat"

Your example does not meet any standard, which the least of it is spelling! LOL

True, but I'd have a nice side income if I could be paid a dollar for every message like that in my inbox.

(in reply to TheBoyDownBelow)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:44:52 AM

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: StefanandLucinda

Hello Athena. Love your mask! I personally cannot relate to how perfect grammer is a required skill a slave must have and equates to an automatic no reply. Apparently, it is to some. I guess everyone has their quirks.

Lucinda

If you want someone to cook for you, do you want a well prepared meal or just some slop that was thrown together?

If someone is uncaring about their writing, there's a good chance that he or she will be careless about other things as well.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to StefanandLucinda)

RE: I dont get it. - 12/31/2012 10:46:45 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: StefanandLucinda

Hello Athena. Love your mask! I personally cannot relate to how perfect grammer is a required skill a slave must have and equates to an automatic no reply. Apparently, it is to some. I guess everyone has their quirks.

Lucinda

I think it's more that people want to feel that the person writing to them has made an effort and taken some time, rather than trying to get out messages as quickly as possible. It just makes a good first impression. Obviously it's not essential to everyone, but equally I've never met anyone who was turned off by good spelling and grammar either, so it's one of those small things you can do which might slightly increase your chances and certainly wont hurt. If the OP is struggling to make headway, he might be open to trying things which might help.

Personally I'd be put off by a potential partner who took the attitude of 'it's just typing, why do you care?'. It'd be a bit like going on a date with someone who turned up in their work clothes and said 'they're only clothes, nothing to do with being a good partner'. It's true, but making an effort to make a good impression shows you care about what the other person might think.

Also, and perhaps this makes me a snob, I don't find it hard to use capital letters and full stops. I'm not perfect, but it takes little conscious effort to use reasonably good grammar. If someone defaults to using text speak or very poor spelling or grammar, that says it's too much effort for them to write properly, either because they are exceptionally lazy, or because they find it exceptionally hard. Someone who is at a very different intellectual or educational level than me might not be a good match. (Yes, I know, learning difficulties can mask this and I'm speaking only in very general terms)

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to StefanandLucinda)

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