RE: How would you react, ladies?

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:17:25 PM

Rawni

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I'd scream 'STALKER' and beat the shit out of him.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:17:43 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

He reacted pretty strongly when I repeatedly told him that it is not a great idea and it's damned near stalkerish and certainly underhand, I'm now a meanie, he's playing the victim card and I just think the worst of people, blah blah.

I don't think he's dangerous, just seems to be incapable to understand that while he might see it as a romantic gesture, a woman would not perceive it as such.

Hopefully he's not dangerous, but if he can't understand why this would make a woman uncomfortable or scared, it makes me wonder what else he wouldn't understand. If he goes through with it and gets rejected, for example, will he continue to pursue her because of his inability to comprehend her viewpoint?There's a fine line between clueless and dangerous.

Aside from the stalkerish tones, it sounds like he hasn't considered that she might not be logging on for a good reason, like she's now in a relationship. I imagine the boyfriend wouldn't interpret his actions in a kindly way either.

I think he sees it as romantic, being so smitten with her that he wants to send flowers for several days before revealing himself...

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:26:09 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Scala

Oh ... so its not ok for me to pop around tomorrow for a cup of tea then ...

You know, feeding 2 fully grown Dobies is pretty expensive and they love their chewies...

Just think how welcome you'd feel if those 2 on the left would come flying at you, they only want to play a bit ;)

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:27:38 PM

Killerangel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

I think he sees it as romantic, being so smitten with her that he wants to send flowers for several days before revealing himself...

That's even worse, building it up. If that doesn't scream stalker from the rooftops then nothing does. It gives the impression that he's there in the background lurking, watching her, over an extended period of time and trying to get her attention over this time instead of just approaching her so that the exchange can be over and done with.

Holy cow, if someone did this flowers over an extended period of time thing it would build up the eventual disclosure to be a total disaster even more so than just doing it in a single encounter. At the time that I'd find out a total stranger was approaching me many times with repeated flower deliveries after tracking me down, there would be nothing that would commend him to me in a positive light. Even thinking about it makes me feel nauseous.

I completely agree with the comments that his thought processes seem dangerous and manipulative.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:31:57 PM

MistressDarkArt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5

We're now at 8 out of 8 for hell no.

Another hell no here. Creepy IS as creepy DOES. According to a 1-10 scale, that is a 9.5 (showing up uninvited on her doorstep is a 10.)

Point him to this thread, and remind him that many women are aces at defending themselves.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:35:29 PM

kallisto

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Another hell no here too.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:35:49 PM

LadyConstanze

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I think the actions come more from being inexperienced and smitten, and really not considering how what he sees as being proactive and inventive, showing her how smart he is and "worthy" of her by finding her, would freak out a woman.

I just mentioned it to H, his comment was "I think he'd be praying for the cops to arrive soon and that would be me showing the utmost selfcontrol!"

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:37:40 PM

LadyConstanze

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Tried to send him the link, seems he deleted his account... I really hope he gives up his plan.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:38:37 PM

Killerangel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Tried to send him the link, seems he deleted his account... I really hope he gives up his plan.

Hmmm, maybe he saw the thread. Let's hope so...

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:40:06 PM

MisterP61

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Tried to send him the link, seems he deleted his account... I really hope he gives up his plan.

If he doesn't, we may see him on the Darwin awards.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:43:41 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
I'd react strongly with a police report and restraining order (and possibly pepper spray)

My reaction would be pretty similar and I'm obviously not very secretive about the whole thing. But someone taking it upon themselves to gather personal information about me that I didn't offer up is genuinely creepy.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:47:32 PM

shiftyw

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I don't understand how he doesn't view this as crazy.
Ugh.
Police would for sure know. So so creepy.

Its not like any romcom I've seen recently either.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 12:50:39 PM

LadyConstanze

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I'm not overly paranoid, met a bunch of people from here just for hanging out together, it's always been a blast, but yes, somebody who would want to meet me and would send me stuff and then "reveal" himself to show me how smart he is, I'd be so spooked out about the intrusion, it wouldn't be nice. Even somebody I might have been attracted to (provided I was single) at another time and place, it would automatically make him untrustworthy and I'd feel spied upon, and it would just feel really really creepy.

I often invite people to come over, for dinner or just a drink or hanging out, but there is this difference between offering personal information or being snooped on...

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:01:11 PM

MasterCaneman

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FR'ing it here. At the risk of sounding conformist, yeah, he's up there on the creep-o-meter in my book. Dudes like that have something upstairs that doesn't 'click' on approved societal norms, and unfortunately, even when they get their noses rubbed in it, they tend to keep coming back for more. Just the fact he was able to get her real-world address alone is a screaming red flag all by itself, because it means he has access to means to circumvent the safety protocols here (and elsewhere). And they aren't afraid of the law, either. They see it as just another 'injustice' against them in their quest for 'true love'. The only real solution for them are generally extremely long prison/hospital sentences, or a shallow grave outside of town.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:08:41 PM

LadyPact

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Even though he's deleted the account and probably won't see the thread, I'm just adding My voice to the hell no category. I'm guessing submissive male and the woman he planned to 'surprise' is a Dominant woman? I guess he isn't aware of how many Dominant women get stalked or realize just how creepy that behavior is to the woman. Tracking somebody down is just nut-jub territory. Period.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:14:36 PM

sexyred1

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Really, this is the plot of every Lifetime movie.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:16:36 PM

DominantWoman65

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My most difficult decision would be.. Do I mace him, taser him or simply throat punch him before I call the police. There would be no need to draw my weapon, it's hard for a man to live down the fact that he got his ass kicked by a 5'4" woman.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:17:05 PM

Missokyst

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I think that man is potentially dangerous.
He is in the delusional belief that that woman who he has never exchanged a word is his soul mate? Based on an image without any other imput at all he is not thinking with a logical brain. He also found out where she is in the real world, very stalkerish behavior.
It may sound extreme but I think I would report it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

He reacted pretty strongly when I repeatedly told him that it is not a great idea and it's damned near stalkerish and certainly underhand, I'm now a meanie, he's playing the victim card and I just think the worst of people, blah blah.

I don't think he's dangerous, just seems to be incapable to understand that while he might see it as a romantic gesture, a woman would not perceive it as such.

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:17:16 PM

Rawni

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RE: How would you react, ladies? - 2/23/2014 1:17:50 PM

LadyConstanze

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What I find scary is that he is looking for a relationship, I mean like this? Just makes me shudder...

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