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RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Submission is a gift


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RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 2:10:14 PM   
longwayhome


Posts: 1035
Joined: 1/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

You guys should feel grateful that I log on here


Ewww. Can't you use the toilet like everyone else?


Best joke of the week!

(Or do I just get it because I am a Brit?)


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Profile   Post #: 61
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 2:11:23 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		One of the problems out of a 100 problems with the dommes you see around these sites is that they think they are an instant winning prize and the male subs have to win the said prize. No one should be the prize and the other has to win. It should be an equal playing field when it comes to the courting process. The sub offers what the domme wants and the domme offers what the sub wants. Simple as that.

(in reply to Cell)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 2:40:24 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Pop down to your local library and check out a couple of books on basic economics.

Pay attention to "supply and demand"

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Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

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Profile   Post #: 63
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 5:14:12 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

Pop down to your local library and check out a couple of books on basic economics.

Pay attention to "supply and demand"


Oh riiight, so just because there are less people of your gender that identify as a dominant, that somehow makes you a superior human being over other human beings.

It all makes sense now....

(in reply to crazyml)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 5:17:28 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		Just like all you intellectually dishonest feminists, you only seem to want equality when men are in a privileged position while you make any excuse under the sun to justify female privileges.

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 5:43:53 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: longwayhome


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

You guys should feel grateful that I log on here


Ewww. Can't you use the toilet like everyone else?


Best joke of the week!

(Or do I just get it because I am a Brit?)



snickers

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Dont Hate Love

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Profile   Post #: 66
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/5/2017 9:51:09 PM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

One of the problems out of a 100 problems with the dommes you see around these sites is that they think they are an instant winning prize and the male subs have to win the said prize. No one should be the prize and the other has to win. It should be an equal playing field when it comes to the courting process. The sub offers what the domme wants and the domme offers what the sub wants. Simple as that.

I disagree. Most people want to win prizes. I think most people like to be with someone whom they feel is the best for themselves.

I mean, why the hell would you want to end up someone whom you find mediocre? Obviously the person you want to end up with should think you are a prize, and you should feel like you have struck lottery and won a prize too.

I mean if you seriously think that person is just everybody else, then what is special about that relationship? Nothing.

I think there is nothing wrong for men or women to feel like they wanna feel like, they are a prize to somebody.


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Profile   Post #: 67
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/6/2017 4:32:20 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen


quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

Pop down to your local library and check out a couple of books on basic economics.

Pay attention to "supply and demand"


Oh riiight, so just because there are less people of your gender that identify as a dominant, that somehow makes you a superior human being over other human beings.

It all makes sense now....



It doesn't surprise me that you should feel this way - But, I don't think any reasonable person could have inferred that from my post.

I was making no statement about my superiority or otherwise vis a vis other human beings. I was simply trying to help you with your confusion.

Suffice it to say, when you claim that it all makes sense to you now, you are mistaken.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/6/2017 4:36:13 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		You're confused.

The number of dommes that expect subs to be grateful has nothing to do with "privilege" it has to do with supply and demand.

There are many subs competing for those dommes.



_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/6/2017 5:13:00 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

You're confused.

The number of dommes that expect subs to be grateful has nothing to do with "privilege" it has to do with supply and demand.

There are many subs competing for those dommes.




Submission is a gift, if dominance is a gift; or neither is, as far as I'm concerned. On the one hand all 'gift' talk can feel a little precious and poncey to me; on the other, someone who's enabling your good times for you is pretty plainly bestowing a desirable gift on you. Whatever.

Re that issue of supply and demand, though: if you exclude the huge mass of 'do-mes', fantasists and various time-wasters amongst malesubs, there are roughly equal numbers of malesubs to femdoms. Also, in one important way femdoms have it harder than malesubs because they have to sort the wheat from the chaff to a degree that we malesubs don't. Or so a femdom friend was explaining to me at a munch, recently.

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Profile   Post #: 70
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/6/2017 9:50:33 AM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		respectman you have my attention with this One of the problems out of a 100 problems with the dommes you see around these sites is that they think they are an instant winning prize and the male subs have to win the said prize.

I agree. But I could change that to dommes women you see around these sites all sites


crazyml supply and demand is not an excuse for poverty.

Bad stereotypes use submission is a gift Now what does that mean and what do they mean by that?

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 6:51:23 AM   
NoirMetal


Posts: 508
Joined: 3/20/2017
Status: offline 		Anyone who has practiced D/s as a top in the lifestyle knows that women who use the term like to be the tail that wags the dog. "jump though my hoops like a trained circus poodle, and you get...."

An actual submissive enjoys being USEFUL,the gift she gets in return is ATTENTION.

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Profile   Post #: 72
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 7:31:34 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		My submissive side was something always kept hidden, and when finally allowed out I never considered it a 'Gift' to the man that got it. He'd always considered himself submissive, but not really allowed his dominant/sadistic side loose with anyone except me, and I doubt he thought as that being a 'gift' to me either. I certainly didn't consider it a gift, it just felt really good on both our parts that finally we'd both met someone that we were comfortable with to explore safely with.

Ok, so it's not a side of me that every guy is going to get, but then that doesn't make it a gift as though it's something so precious to be kept in a sacred box. Everything about me is given in increments depending on the individual.

Needles

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Profile   Post #: 73
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 7:51:56 AM   
NoirMetal


Posts: 508
Joined: 3/20/2017
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

My submissive side was something always kept hidden, and when finally allowed out I never considered it a 'Gift' to the man that got it. He'd always considered himself submissive, but not really allowed his dominant/sadistic side loose with anyone except me, and I doubt he thought as that being a 'gift' to me either. I certainly didn't consider it a gift, it just felt really good on both our parts that finally we'd both met someone that we were comfortable with to explore safely with.

Ok, so it's not a side of me that every guy is going to get, but then that doesn't make it a gift as though it's something so precious to be kept in a sacred box. Everything about me is given in increments depending on the individual.

Needles

gift implies no strings attached. That is the usual objection to the term.

But how disingenuous is someone who implies they are making some sort of sacrifice-when it's really a trade?

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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 8:31:11 AM   
ThatDizzyChick


Posts: 5490
Status: offline 		My submission is more of a burden than a gift.

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Not your average bimbo.

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Profile   Post #: 75
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 8:43:25 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		My submission has a set of boundaries, it has a set of strings, if you want to term it that way, that consist of what my wants are within those boundaries. A gift is something you do give to someone unconditionally ... usually ... therefore, as a person, with wants, needs, hard limits, and so forth, of your own, just how can submission be termed a gift? It's a ridiculous notion. If submission is a gift then so is everything else, and thus it's all diminished. People need to stop trying to guild the Lily when it's just a flower like all the others.

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

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Profile   Post #: 76
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 8:48:25 AM   
DaddySatyr


Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

My submission has a set of boundaries, it has a set of strings, if you want to term it that way, that consist of what my wants are within those boundaries. A gift is something you do give to someone unconditionally ... usually ... therefore, as a person, with wants, needs, hard limits, and so forth, of your own, just how can submission be termed a gift? It's a ridiculous notion. If submission is a gift then so is everything else, and thus it's all diminished. People need to stop trying to guild the Lily when it's just a flower like all the others.

Needles



I have found that the biggest "string" is the fact that VERY FEW (almost no) submissives give themselves to someone without expecting dominance in return. That cuts right down to the nuts 'n' bolts, avoiding all the " ... well, but I won't do anal sex or dishes" stuff.



Michael

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/7/2017 10:00:51 AM   
tamaka


Posts: 5079
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

My submission is more of a burden than a gift.


Lol. :)

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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/10/2017 3:57:00 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		Fast reply:

I don't see my dominance or sadism as a gift, it's something I do like doing, an urge...

If you are submissive you have a similar urge... The other side of the coin.

It's about compatibility, otherwise you are having an urge that doesn't get scratched and it doesn't matter how much or often you call it a gift, if there are no takers, you're left there with your gift (which is an unscratched urge), BDSM requires 2 willing participants (maybe more if you're into it) but the motivations are usually something that drives you to it because you get something out, otherwise you'd join the peace corps or work for a charity.

Seriously, if it would be such a gift and so selfless, then why aren't all the submissives in a religious order? Also about submission, sacrifice, etc.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: It's nice to see the balance in BDSM returning Subm... - 4/11/2017 6:41:10 AM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
Joined: 10/31/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Fast reply:

I don't see my dominance or sadism as a gift, it's something I do like doing, an urge...

If you are submissive you have a similar urge... The other side of the coin.

It's about compatibility, otherwise you are having an urge that doesn't get scratched and it doesn't matter how much or often you call it a gift, if there are no takers, you're left there with your gift (which is an unscratched urge), BDSM requires 2 willing participants (maybe more if you're into it) but the motivations are usually something that drives you to it because you get something out, otherwise you'd join the peace corps or work for a charity.

Seriously, if it would be such a gift and so selfless, then why aren't all the submissives in a religious order? Also about submission, sacrifice, etc.

Well said, LC. Spot on.

_____________________________

vML

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. ~ MLK Jr.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 80
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