quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

This thread is not to argue the merits of doing or not doing Rituals and Protocols or expressing ones preferences.  I do believe everyone can appreciate that some do them and some do not. 

I would like this thread to be for those that do or want to have Rituals and Protocols in their relationship dynamic.  So are some of the ones that you do or would like to do?  Is there a specific reason for them?

I do enjoy a level of Rituals and Protocols within my relationships and these are some of them...

- my girls say "my Pleasure" instead of "your welcome"

- my girls eat with their primary hand while the other rests on their lap when it is idle.

- my girls kneel at the bed for bedtime and ask permission to sleep in my bed and give thanks when it is granted.  In the case of kyra when she is in Florida she expresses a devotion and gives thanks.

- they always walk a step behind me unless told otherwise

- they never enter a room ahead of me unless told otherwise.

As I said this some... and generally I do them because they cause me a gratification or pleasure.  I also do them because they reinforce the dynamics of the relationship that we have established.  Not only do they reinforce it but I find they also lead to growth in the dynamics as well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

I would like this thread to be for those that do or want to have Rituals and Protocals in their relationship dynamic.  So are some of the ones that you do or would like to do?  Is there a specific reason for them?

quote:

  - my girls say "my Pleasure" instead of "your welcome"

1. When speaking to me, I prefer Ma’am.
   
2. As a minimum:
   1. “Yes, Ma’am” or “No, Ma’am” in answer to a question.
   2. “Yes, Ma’am” or “No, Ma’am” in acknowledgement of an order or request.
   3. “Ma’am” at the beginning of a question or a request.
   4. “Thank you, Ma’am” as appropriate.
3. When speaking of me, in the community, Master Fire.
   
4. When speaking to me, outside the community, I still prefer Ma’am.
5. When speaking of me, outside the community, Fire will suffice, but my given name is perfectly fine as well.

1. If you are unsure what title and/or pronoun a person uses, ask them.
2. Unless you truly, truly have a problem with a particular person, refer to them by title.
3. Be polite to everyone, whenever possible.

1. Pronouns referring to you are lowercase.
2. Pronouns referring to me are uppercase (I will not use this).
3. Don’t use the O/our style; it annoys me.
4. your name and title are lowercase.
5. My name and title are uppercase.

1. Be aware of your actions as all time.
   
2. you represent me in all kinds of public, not just Leather. Act accordingly.
3. When we’re together, be polite. Take my coat, open doors, etc. The door protocol is at the end of the list.

1. I expect daily contact in person, by email, by IM or by phone.
2. you must contact me.
3. I should, at no time, be excessively wondering how you are or what you’re doing.
4. The only exception is if you have limited access to a computer or a phone. As much as possible, I want to know about this in advance. We will set up a schedule.

1. A formal present is to be used when we are in appropriate company, a standing present when in a more vanilla setting. If you are unsure, ask if I want you to present.
2. Present at these times:
3. A morning greeting. This is when you first see me for the day and I seem somewhat together.
4. Saying goodnight. This is when you last see me for the day or before we get into bed, if I’ve asked you to join me.
5. Before you leave the house/building to go about your day or a major errand where you have to leave the property.
6. When we come home at the end of the work day. If you are home first, I like it especially if you’re already kneeling when I walk in the door, with a basket for all the “stuff” I wear on a daily basis. I will do my best to call on my way home to let you know when I should be expected.

1. Everyone will be seated at the table.
2. Assume you have permission to speak, but do so respectfully.
3. you may begin to eat when I have begun.
4. you may be excused before me, with permission.
5. you are excused at any time after I have left the table.

1. Masters are seated at the table and slaves are directed where to stand, in service.
2. you will be naked unless otherwise directed.
3. you will eat in the kitchen as time allows or when the meal has been completed.
4. Learn to set a formal table. Figure out how to modify it as my china allows.
5. you will seat me first, then each guest individually.
6. When the meal is ready to be served, place each napkin in the respective lap.
7. A new course is served once everyone is finished with the previous course.
8. Serve food from the left.
9. Remove dishes from the right as people are finished with them.
10. Pour drinks beside the table. This means remove the glass from the table, pour the drink, then return the glass to where it was on the table.
11. Never reach across a person or plate, especially with liquid.
12. If a guest has temporarily left the table, place their napkin on the back of their chair.

1. you will be given a position in which to walk, such as ahead and to the left.
   
2. When attending me
   1. Walk in your position. If in front, don’t leave me in the dust. If behind, don’t step on my skirt.
   2. Walk with your hands behind your back, unless carrying something bulky.
   3. If approached for a hug or a touch by someone, direct them to ask me for permission.
3. you are to ask permission to socialize. When socializing, you are free to hug, casually touch and casually kiss friends and family.
   
4. you are to remain within my sight or within earshot at all times.
5. you are to never leave my vicinity without permission. I should never, at any time, find myself wondering where you are.

1. you will be naked, if we are in a private setting.
2. you will do a kneeling present (if you can) when another Master enters the room.
3. you will do a kneeling present (if you can) when another Master is taking his/her leave.
4. you will speak when spoken to or ask permission to speak should you wish to add to the conversation.

1. I will stand out of the way of the swing of the door. This means, I will step away from the door’s hinges. If there’s a double door, this will be the indication of the door I choose to use. I will try to be consistent in my choice, but no guarantees.
2. If you attend to the front, you will cross in front of me to get to the door, if needed. If you attend behind, you will cross behind me.
3. If the door opens towards us, I will walk through first. If the door opens away from us, you will go through first, then hold the door.
4. Car doors will be opened for me. If you’re female, I will most likely need to be reminded of my own damned protocol. We’ll make it a point of humor. *smirk*

quote:

ORIGINAL: HollyS

quote:

  - my girls say "my Pleasure" instead of "your welcome"

Personally I make it a point to say "with pleasure" rather than "my pleasure."  It's a way of being clear that while I am pleased to be doing whatever it is, that I would still do it even were I not so.  My pleasure does not dictate my compliance. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

This thread is not to argue the merits of doing or not doing Rituals and Protocals or expressing ones preferences.  I do believe everyone can appreciate that some do them and some do not. 

I would like this thread to be for those that do or want to have Rituals and Protocals in their relationship dynamic.  So are some of the ones that you do or would like to do?  Is there a specific reason for them?

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExSteelAgain

I don't live with her, so we don't have that many because of that constraint alone. I do tend to have more protocols early in a relationship as I find it necessary to reinforce my control during that time. I have let many rituals wither as my control has been firmly established. The one I leave her with is always drinking with her left hand. Since she is right handed, this requires thought. She has a career and this is the reminder to her throughout the day that she is my slave even if it is slightly awkward when she has lunch or whatever.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: HollyS

quote:

  - my girls say "my Pleasure" instead of "your welcome"

Personally I make it a point to say "with pleasure" rather than "my pleasure."  It's a way of being clear that while I am pleased to be doing whatever it is, that I would still do it even were I not so.  My pleasure does not dictate my compliance. 

It maybe clear to you... but frankly... "with pleasure" doesn't clearly indicate to me any sort of compliance.  In only indicates clearly what you did was given "with pleasure".  It is the actual act that indicates compliance not words after the fact!

quote:

secondly... many don't need to compare and make negative evaluations and comparisons of what others do in expressing what they themselves do.  But, some need to do it to feel better about themselves.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExSteelAgain

KOM, since I'm still around, I'll follow-up a bit. I considered extensive protocols about telling her what to wear daily and so on, but that gets to be too tiresome for both, I think. If I'm planning on having a relationship that lasts for a good while, I am careful with things like that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists


I share this thought as well.  I don't want rituals or protocals that become a chore but an enhance to my relationship. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLordTrainer
While at a fetish event or munch she is to be in My presence at all times, with exception to restroom which she politely will request permission, she is not permitted to speak to anyone until returning back to Me and again with permission only may she do so, unless of course we know them very well. Further, she will address all known Dom/me's as Sir or Ma'am.