sophiesback
Posts: 4039
Joined: 11/4/2009 From: Illinois Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BKSir I admit that I have NO friggin idea what the hell is going on here right now... I admit that I am curious, and feeling bad that I've not had the time to keep up on things. I admit that if Sophie wants to tell me on the other side I'm open to it, and have a shoulder for her if nothing else. I admit I would tell you on the other side, except the other side won't work for me right now. I admit in a nutshell, I stood up for myself. I gave him the choice of "shit or get off the pot" basically. Then I got angry and texted him some very colorful words because he was avoiding me and in the end I told him "I hate you. I wish I never met you. I'm out of your life". 8-10 hours later he texted me saying he just received 120 texts from me (I've witnessed this - we thought it was my phone so I changed service - but it was his and with my new service seems to happen more grrrr). He wanted to talk. We tried talking through the phone but both kept getting defensive. After about the 3rd round of that and my saying this is not productive, he suggested we wait until tomorrow (today) and he'd come over and we could talk in person. The whole getting defensive every time we tried to talk made me realize that my demand of all or nothing would only truly work if we chose nothing - we're both too angry/defensive with the other to jump right back in and give it all. We would be right back to the same place in no time. I retreated a bit on my demands by giving in that I'd give him space for a while so he can get other stuff in his life together and get over the anger at me, but that he couldn't have complete freedom from us and he agreed to it. After months of fighting and arguing it's the first time I said I was leaving and meant it and I think he realized that. If he goes straight back to the way he was acting, I'm out. If he works his way back to how we were for the 7+ years before that, I'm in. Obviously, everyone struggles and has hard times, I'm not going to run at the first sight of trouble, but I'm not going to be a doormat to him ever again.
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CM's Resident Goof 30 Fluffy points
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