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?switch? - 6/15/2007 11:51:33 AM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		I am a slave owned by LordKen. I am perfectly content in this, its what i want and what i feel like i was meant to do and be.
I have found that the idea of asking someone to do things (sexual and non-sexual) and having them be egar to please me is enticing to me. does this mean i am not a slave? i have NO desire to beat, whip, or really dominate someone. Hell...i'm not sure i know what i'm asking....


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*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:17:07 PM   
DragonNphoenix


Posts: 617
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I dont think that this means that you are not a slave.  i am a slave for Master Dragon Stormwolf, but i am Domme to our wildflower.  My Master is the ONLY person that i am submissive to, i am dominent in my other relationships.  Does this make me less of a slave to my Dragon??  No, i dont think so.  But this is just how our relationship works.
 
1st girl Phoenix

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**Pain is just pleasure with a twist**

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:20:33 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		i guess i'm having a hard time with it became i NEVER fancied myself anything but a submissive type...so i'm not sure where to "file" this new feeling or interest, if you will.....

_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:30:23 PM   
HaveRopeWillBind


Posts: 514
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline 		ImThat,

This is not all that unusual. I have a very good friend who was raised third generation in a family of BDSM slaves and she is owned and is quite happy serving her dominant. However she also enjoys keeping slaves of her own for herself and is given the lattitude to do so by her dominant so long as they are not male. In fact she would only prefer to top another female so this is not an issue at all. Her dominant does not use her "personal" slave and has no problem with her having one so long as her service to him does not suffer.

There was another thread recently concerning this same sort of issue. You might want to go through that.

Before you do anything in regard to topping another be sure you have fully discussed your desire with LordKen and have his approval and support. Make sure you both understand the conditions to be involved, and make sure the third party who you will be topping understands the situation as well.

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:48:54 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		You can be a slave and a top.  Slave does not mean exclusive to all other interests or desires.  Top, dominant, sadist, bondage fetish, bootblacking, you name it- plenty of slaves enjoy it.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:53:46 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		Geez...i guess i'm glad i asked...i had no idea it was a common and "ok" thing....LOL...thanks for helping me "process" this new interest.

_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 12:59:01 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Well most people ACT like it's rare, and will TRY and say it's rare, and you'll get plenty of weird looks and questions about it.

But how's that different from any other day? :)

If you're being true to yourself, fulfilled, and it's consensual- why wouldn't it be ok?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 1:01:20 PM   
velvetears


Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline 		Just enjoy what it is you feel you want to experience and as long as it doesn't go against what your owner wants who is to say you are "wrong" or not a slave.  There are so many variations to this lifestyle, but by reading some opinions that are bandied about you would never know it. Some are hard line others are more flexible. Don't force yourself into any box just cause someone else says that's the only box a slave cn fit into.  You're Master is happy, you are happy, that's all that counts.

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Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 1:43:46 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: imthatacheyouhav

I am a slave owned by LordKen. I am perfectly content in this, its what i want and what i feel like i was meant to do and be.
I have found that the idea of asking someone to do things (sexual and non-sexual) and having them be egar to please me is enticing to me. does this mean i am not a slave? i have NO desire to beat, whip, or really dominate someone. Hell...i'm not sure i know what i'm asking....



Some Dommes actually don't do this.  Really!  I think tht Doms lean on this mental image so their subs think that being a Domme is not a good thing.  What you have found is what we Dommes enjoy :)  A man who knows enough to pay attention to do what makes you happy :)  And he gets the same in kind.

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Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 2:08:15 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		No, it doesn't mean that you're not a slave. It simply means that you also like to Top. I know many sadistic, Toppy slaves and many masochistic, bottomy Masters. It's all good.

Master Fire


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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 3:29:43 PM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		Can you be a slave while still being a mother to a child, a sister to a brother, a daughter to a father, and a subordinate to a boss at work?

People would like you to beleive that these terms are so black and white and you cant be this if your that or cant be that if your this.

I would think of this as a growth in your own identity. Slave to one person, a daughter to your father, maybe a mother to a child, and now a Top/Dom to someone else.

People arent simply one thing all the time to everbody. What makes someone a slave as how they interact and identify with the person they choose to call Master. How they interact with anyone else is irrelevant.


< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 6/15/2007 3:31:32 PM >

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Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

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(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 4:19:22 PM   
MamaDomme


Posts: 283
Joined: 12/28/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: imthatacheyouhav

i guess i'm having a hard time with it became i NEVER fancied myself anything but a submissive type...so i'm not sure where to "file" this new feeling or interest, if you will.....



Just embrace the feelings and experience it all to your heart's desire.  Be true to your inner self~~~~

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 5:26:28 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		only once did i do anything "toppy" to my Master...and i think He liked it...but it felt very strange...and kinda naughty LOL.
I'm a grown woman of 43 and it actually made me giggle....LOL  We were getting ready to leave our hotel to check out and i said "Master, come here please." (ok that wasnt the toppy part) He came over to me and went to sit down on the bed...and i said, "Did i say You could sit down?" LOL,  the LOOK on His face was PRICELESS!! He actually said "I wasnt gonna sit down" then i said "Drop Your pants and bend over the bed." He smiled and complied.... and i proceeded to lick and suck on Him ...well you know...back there..... HE LOVED IT...and i felt this incredible rush...it was too awesome.....i wanna do it again...


_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to MamaDomme)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 5:29:18 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		I know a poly family that consists of A being dominant to B, B being dominant to C and C being dominant to A. I never could figure out how they made it work, but they did, and that family has been together for over two decades now. They once asked me if I was interested in joining, but I couldn't figure out the math. They were using some complex algebra that I didn't understand. All I kept coming up with is that A, B and C would be beating the crap out of me on a constant basis, and at the same time I'd have to dominate an undisclosed party at a point in the uncertain future; otherwise, we'd end up destroying the very foundation of the N+ universe.


< Message edited by littlesarbonn -- 6/15/2007 5:31:11 PM >

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 7:22:21 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		*chuckling* I'll bet LordKen was so surprised He went along with it before He actually thought about it! And besides ... who can resist dropping His pants when His girl asks so nicely :-) and there's a reward!

As you've heard, being a slave and also being a Top (or even a Domme) isn't so unusual. But it will be important to work out with your Master whether the two of you want to switch (even if it's only every now and then) or whether He'd rather you Top someone else. There's no absolute best way here, I've seen both work very successfully. It really depends on your mindsets and how easily you can both transition between roles.

2 examples: One couple I know spent most of their time with Him as Master and she as slave. I'd have to be honest and say she wasn't the easiest slave ... rather feisty! But every 2-3 weeks they would switch for a predetermined time, often about 3 days. Heck She was a far more intense Sadist than he ... I used to feel sorry for him if the switch was on during play parties LOL! Though he enjoyed the chance to bottom. Given that the time was relatively short, She didn't truly Dominate in terms of making life decisions etc, though She did get to boss him about! They had a few issues from time to time (as everyone does) but most of the time it worked well for them.

Master and I are a bit different, first time we met, I Dommed him and that worked well. But shortly after, by mutual agreement, we switched ... and this is the sort of switch that's then glued in place! Much as I have fond memories of him as a sub, it's not gonna happen again LOL! Master is Master, and that's that. And I wouldn't want to switch with Him again, it wouldn't feel right (though I can't resist lightly smacking His bum and teasing Him a bit *grin*). But I understand entirely the appeal of having someone eager to please ... which is why I am seeking a 24/7 slave for Me, who would also be under Master's general control in the house, but would be My responsibility.

you seem to feel that you don't want to Dominate, or inflict pain. That's fine, Tops don't have to be sadists. you might get a lot of pleasure out of Topping other kinds of play ... sexual play, sensation play, bondage, mummification ... heaps of things to try! Or you may also prove to be an excellent domestic slave trainer for those wanting to learn how to serve. Main thing is ... discuss it with your Master ... then experiment and enjoy!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 7:35:12 PM   
LadyHeart


Posts: 561
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		The way I describe it is this:
to be sexually submissive to my Master is a turn on
to Top another is a buzz
:))
LH

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"BDSM is not an excuse for bad manners."

(in reply to MaamJay)
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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 7:43:26 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

*chuckling* I'll bet LordKen was so surprised He went along with it before He actually thought about it!

LOL...i'm sure you are 200% right about that..because it all happened in about 2 mins and then my tongue was, well you know....so i'm sure it didnt register right away but i know it has since and He hasnt brought it up...so i guess i should eh?


_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to MaamJay)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 8:08:19 PM   
LadyIce


Posts: 406
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline 		It takes many people a long time to decide what category or categories
they fit into.
At least switches realize that they identify  with both categories.
I have met switches that were not willing to admit to being a switch, prefering
to stay in a category that they clearly did not fit into.

< Message edited by LadyIce -- 6/15/2007 8:12:46 PM >

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 9:47:02 PM   
Suleiman


Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline 		Switch is just a label, hon - and so is slave. You are what you are, and can not be anything else.

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Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

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RE: ?switch? - 6/15/2007 10:04:42 PM   
MissOchistic


Posts: 315
Joined: 4/30/2007
Status: offline 		O'course not!

I got a friend who loves to worship my feet, the the little sadist in me does enjoy seeing what hoops he will jump through for the chance.  He also loves being whipped in a non sexual setting, and it's fun, so I oblige him ^.^

I also enjoy rock climbing, but it doesn't make me any less of a boxer.


_____________________________



"The amount i care for Thee
is more than two, but less than three."

"Submission is a potlatch."

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Profile   Post #: 20
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