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LadyHugs -> RE: trying to understand sadism (7/4/2007 8:55:19 AM)
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Dear pussinbootz, Ladies and Gentlemen;
Nothing in BDSM, D/s, M/s and especially S&M should be done because we hate it, forced into it, terrorized or intimidated into it.
I consider myself many things, to include a Sadist. I have other Sadists who title me as one.
As a Sadist -- I do not enjoy a scene with anybody who doesn't like pain or play with pain. I am just as qualified in sensual flogging, caning and spanking--it is just an adjustment in my mental frame and my emotional frame remains the same -- how can I create something enjoyable for the victim --err, slave/submissive.
My only upsets in the S&M theater, are those who won't improve their skills and or accuracy with impliments or learn before they do things on another human body--its reckless and shouldn't be tolerated. S&M is an art form and requires skills because it can--repeat can; be a very dangerous thing to do and play with. Although miss-hits, bruises, cuts and accidents do happen--the idea of just beating blindly without warm-up and or little respect for the masochist is becoming a real problem in BDSM and in S&M. Using S&M as a cover for poor skills is not something I relish.
Another thing that is often confused; are those masochists. Not all masochists enjoy the 'submissive' role or have a submissive bone in their being. They 'concede' rather than submit into a surrender/submissive role. Perhaps this is why you hear terms of TOPPING/bottoming and or Sadist/masochist --instead of M/s or D/s. There are those who are rather unique who do enjoy the servant role in which the time spent in a slave/submissive role acts to refresh the mind as allows the body time to recover for the next S&M exchange. Those who do S&M knows back to back S&M play--although a desire, need--the body looses sensitivities to which ruins the whole idea of pain play. Things have to go harder, more risky as to achieve the same sensitivities when they have been lost by over-doing.
As far as Sadists go, it can be a crude analogy however, pain is a drug--a chemical. So Sadists create the pain cocktail as to give the masochist their high--much like a drug trip. The difference is; old time Sadists don't inject anything--all is external application of well placed and well timed pain to which the body's pain management system responds. Natural reaction, like stubbing a toe, you immediately start howling 'ow ow ow' hop around, grab the painful digit and the body chemical rush or throb--pain that may get one in a weak state, seeing stars and or a bright flash of light. The trip masochists like is that which allows them to enjoy the out of body sub-space/flying. It is that escape people need to just take a break from life or the normal.
Sadists through their scent react to masochist's scent releases--the Pheromones, Adrenaline, body's send on the air signals which affect/effect the other. Chemical releases through scent will change the other's mental chemicals to which pleasure and excitement will be enhanced.
It goes back to primal human--we rise into a gradual frenzy and then the flight down.
Some people need panic to get the high--these are thrill seekers, that get a rush when they have success. There are many cocktails that people use to get their 'fix' by using their own body's chemicals to make it all happen. Some hard core former drug users said that if S&M was discovered before shooting up all this stuff out on the street and society, et.al., they would have never had to spend a dime on illegal drugs--they had more than what they sought via drugs by S&M. So many drug addicts have confessed kicking drugs period--have been due to the qualities of good S&M practices.
In S&M--the criteria by today's standards, is that we both--TOP and bottom--MUST enjoy it. Otherwise, it is not S&M by modern standards but, abuse, torture and visit back to the Inquisition where S&M wasn't consensual.
Just some thoughts.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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