RE: Master why do you want to share me? (Full Version)

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slaveluci -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 7:21:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty
This is exactly why I do it.  The only things you can share are things you actually own.  Sharing them is proof that they belong to you.  Until you do something with them that one can only do with property (sharing, selling, transfering title) the Ownership is purely theoretic

First of all, my Master owns me and doesn't have to "prove" it to anyone.  I would really have to wonder about Him if He felt the need to lend me out just to "prove" to others that I was actually His property.  He has to prove nothing to anyone in that regard as it's well established in both of our minds and that's all that's necessary. 

Secondly, saying that you don't own something unless you share/sell/transfer it just makes no sense.  Once something is mine (like a house, car, Ipod, laptop computer, etc.), it's mine.  I don't have to lend it out to every passing stranger to prove it's mine to lend.  Whoa....I couldn't disagree with you more here.  It's fine if you feel this way but please don't assume it IS this way for everyone.

All that said.....I think lots of doms/masters lend their subs/slaves for a variety of reasons pleasing to both them and their subs/slaves.  I think that's wonderful.  As someone earlier mentioned (in here and other threads of late), my Master never lends His prized possessions whether it's me, His truck, His guitars...whatever He highly values.  He values me and all those things and doesn't place them in the fumbling hands of strangers because that level of trust simply isn't there.  He admits that He doesn't "play well with others" and no one plays with His "toys."  This works great for us and it's certainly no indicator that I'm not just as owned as a slave who does get shared.......slave luci



MadRabbit -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 7:34:53 PM)

I think TallDarkandWitty came a little too over the top when he said that.

I understand what he means though.

If I had someone I called a slave and all she did for an entire year was bring me coffee and give me blowjobs, then it would be incredibly easy for me to say I have a complete authority dynamic in place.

This is one of the reasons why I like to push and test. The harder the task, the more she does it for me and not for her, the more I feal the authority dynamic in place and the convictions strengthened.

The times I feal the most poigancy is when the act is at my discrection and for my desire and for my will.

I think this is just his way of testing the lines of his own authority dynamic and seeing the convictions of his slave.



Rover -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 7:48:24 PM)

PLEASE don't take offense at this question, it's legitimate inquiry. 
 
Reading your reply, it's easy to interpret that as a Dominant in need of reassurance.  How far off the mark would that be, and why?
 
John



slaveluci -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 7:49:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
This is one of the reasons why I like to push and test. The harder the task, the more she does it for me and not for her, the more I feal the authority dynamic in place and the convictions strengthened

I agree.  However, I do not think the task has to involve being lent out to others in order to be "hard" and in order to feel the "authority dynamic" is in place.  That's the issue I had with the statement.  Master very much pushes and tests me as it pleases Him.  It does not please Him to share me with another and therefore He does not.  This does not mean the "appropriate" dynamic between Master and slave is not present.  If it ever did suddenly please Him to share me, it would be done without hesitation.  He CAN do it, He just doesn't WANT to....yet at least.
quote:

The times I feal the most poigancy is when the act is at my discrection and for my desire and for my will

Again, very much agreed.  Again also - the acts are always at Master's discretion and for His desire and His will.  The act just doesn't happen to be the act of being shared, that's all[:)].
quote:

I think this is just his way of testing the lines of his own authority dynamic and seeing the convictions of his slave.

Could be.  I think that's great.  It just doesn't have to be my Master's way.  I look at it like this in my own situation:  Master could share me (something that would very much displease Him) to "prove" I'm really and truly owned and His property to loan OR He could not share me and simultaneously be very pleased with my performance of every other task He sets before me.  He's Master, He should always be pleased.  So, He doesn't share, we're both pleased, and we both have no question as to how owned I am.  It's simply what works for us.  And....as has been mentioned....there are lots of subs/slaves who WANT to be shared.  Is it really a difficult "task" to do what you crave to do anyway?[;)]  Just trying to state a different view here.............luci



missbehaeven -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 8:20:46 PM)

~warm smiles~
Greetings everyone,
Minetoshare, I'm not sure why your master wishes to share you with others.
It may be a simple as your master enjoys an occasional polyamorous situation or it may be that he sees a more complex training opportunity for you in obediance or in another area.
 
To echo what a few others have said, I'll repeat that you need to talk with him regarding safety nets in place for you, in terms protection against STD's and pregnancy, and more literally a safe environment where you won't come to physical harm at this other person's (or multiple persons') hands.
 
I'd not leave any part of this scenario unplanned or to chance, and if you're not comfortable with the responses to questions you're getting, I'd refuse. It will be very little comfort to you if you're injured, or contract a disease, if all you're able to say is that you were just trying to be pleasing...~s~
 
I wish you well, and hope that however this resolves brings you closer together with your master..~warm smiles~
 
Take care, everyone...miss



Polynikes -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 8:29:21 PM)

Speaking for myself, I don't share my subs/slaves.  Big Man doesn't share 4 things; my food, my bike, my tools and my sub/slave.  I'm possesive.  When I take on a sub/slave she commits to me 100% in body and mind.  I take that commitment very seriously.  I don't require my sub/slave to submit sexually to anyone but me.  That is what I consider acceptable.  Others feel different and that is cool.  I don't think that my way is the right way for everyone, but that is how I roll.



angelic -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 8:33:29 PM)

Hard limit with me.  He wants to share, he can share someone else while he watches my backside walkin' away.  ~just me~

edited to add:  ~ooohhhh i just noticed a new paddle~ (not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing). [8D]



completenz -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 8:51:38 PM)

hi angelic
with you here.
C. will not share me with anyone and i feel the same about Him.
If this is something the O.P. agreed to then she has to find a way to deal with it. If she did not then... maybe he is not the one for her.
i am sorry if this sounds harsh but i remember when i was looking..... Doms trying to force me into sharing, into being bi. No thanks.... move along [:)]



MzMia -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:05:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: completenz

hi angelic
with you here.
C. will not share me with anyone and i feel the same about Him.
If this is something the O.P. agreed to then she has to find a way to deal with it. If she did not then... maybe he is not the one for her.
i am sorry if this sounds harsh but i remember when i was looking..... Doms trying to force me into sharing, into being bi. No thanks.... move along [:)]


These are my thoughts also, that is why we also have a thing called "Limits".
If this is not something that you want OR are willing to become involved in.
Make it a limit, make it clear, problem solved.
The word "consensual" here often takes on new meanings.



KnightofMists -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:08:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty
This is exactly why I do it.  The only things you can share are things you actually own.  Sharing them is proof that they belong to you.  Until you do something with them that one can only do with property (sharing, selling, transfering title) the Ownership is purely theoretic

First of all, my Master owns me and doesn't have to "prove" it to anyone.  I would really have to wonder about Him if He felt the need to lend me out just to "prove" to others that I was actually His property.  He has to prove nothing to anyone in that regard as it's well established in both of our minds and that's all that's necessary. 



Just because one is shared doesn't indicate one is Proving to Others that they are owned.  It might be just proving it to those within the relationship itself.  I do believe that proving it for the sake of others is rather silly and reflects some serious issues.  But.. if it's not proved to those within the relationship itself... that I have to agree...it's all just theoretics and could very likely be an illusion.

That is not to say that Sharing one's property is the only way to prove to the relationship that it is more than an illusion.  There are more ways to do it.. and sharing doesn't have to be a part of that..



slaveluci -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:29:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
Just because one is shared doesn't indicate one is Proving to Others that they are owned.  It might be just proving it to those within the relationship itself

Good point, Knight.  I didn't take it to mean that at all.  I read it as proving to "outsiders."  I do understand what you're saying.  If those in any given relationship feel it necessary to do so, then if that is what works in that dynamic, that's great.
quote:

That is not to say that Sharing one's property is the only way to prove to the relationship that it is more than an illusion.  There are more ways to do it.. and sharing doesn't have to be a part of that..

My point exactly.  If an owner chooses to share his property and that proves something to him, his slave, or someone else that he feels it's necessary to prove, that's great.  I just wanted to make clear the viewpoint that sharing one's property is not essential to "prove" something (to those either in or outside of the relationship) in all relationships and certainly not in mine.  There are so many wonderful relationships that operate in very different ways..........luci     



MadRabbit -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:32:06 PM)

I can see what you are saying and how it could be interrupted that way.

However, the difference is my fetish lies within control and its fulfilled by exerting that control.

The more selfless and difficult (I dont want to make it sound that I have to go out of my way to be difficult all the time) the act is, the more poignant and fulfilling the experience is for me.

Hence, for example, I would get more bliss from, lets say, ordering someone to drink urine as opposed to changing the way they dress.

The first one shows more devotion because its something not everyone can easily do as opposed to the act of wearing a different outfit for me.

The act of sharing tends to fall into the lines of heavy objectification and also something that can be difficult so I can understand where TallDarkandWitty is coming from.

Edited : Also...the other perspective is, not reassurance, but rather proving the contigencies we have created for ourselves. Without some degree of challenge applied to the relationship, the convictions of "complete authority and complete obedience" can seem rather hollow.

Much like all the sappy romance movies where the couple starts off distant and shallow in their relationship, but then some great tragedy or drama occurs that brings them closer together and more in touch with how they feal towards each other.






KnightofMists -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:41:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
Much like all the sappy romance movies where the couple starts off distant and shallow in their relationship, but then some great tragedy or drama occurs that brings them closer together and more in touch with how they feal towards each other.


or it breaks them apart because their relationship was based on sand



MadRabbit -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:43:47 PM)

Exactly. I think relationships have to have some degree of hardship put towards them to find out what they are made of.




KnightofMists -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/18/2007 9:47:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Exactly. I think relationships have to have some degree of hardship put towards them to find out what they are made of.




There is nothing more powerful than Self-Validation in my opinion.

Within the context of a Relationship.. the person's themselves will Validate the Relationship between them.  Such Self-Validations are extremely powerful to the strength and endurance of a relationship.



nephandi -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/19/2007 5:04:35 AM)

General reply to the tread.

Hi

You will all probably hate me now, but if the slave have given her or himself completly over to the Master, is it then rigt to say no when the Master demand something, even when it is uncomfortable for the slave. my Master want to share me, and i want that to. But even if i did not, if one have said, you own me, one do in a way swear away the right to say no. It may be me that are just strange that if one is in a total power exhance replationshio to bail out on an order because it may be uncomfortable. Talk about it whit ones Master, yes, beg to not have to, yes, but if one have sworn to obey, in my opinion one should unless one want the relationship to just be a farse.

i wish you all well



Aswad -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/19/2007 5:12:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Hate to go off topic, but is the mentality of viewing the slave as an object something you had difficulty with when you were still new and inexperienced to M/S?


It's an adjustment. Try viewing a rock as alive, even a partner. With exercise, you get more flexible. The mind is nearly infinitely malleable in that sense; all boundaries can be shifted any distance in any direction, created and removed. It just takes practice, and ideally a bit of know-how.

quote:


I get off on the mentality. I love it. However, the mentality itself is something that doesnt completely come natural to me. I tend to think in terms of a partner rather than a slave.


Force of habit, Rabbit. [:D]
Take it one step at a time.
In time, the mind adapts to it.
Then the concepts change around.

P.S.: Pardon the wordplay.



Adrao -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/19/2007 6:43:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

why do Masters share their prized possession?
Because they can.



QFT



kittensmailbox -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/19/2007 6:59:29 AM)

Being shared with another Master is an extremely hard limit of mine… I hate how thought even makes me feel… I hate that my Dom would think so little of me to just hand me over to another man… Mistress were always ok, but never another Master… I told him upfront that I would rather be release then passed around like a joint at a Grateful Dead concert…

Whatever others do is their business, but as for me, it would make me feel cheap, used and worthless…



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Master why do you want to share me? (7/19/2007 7:21:47 AM)

Personally, I'd never share someone unless they felt the calling to be shared within themselves.  To me that's too much part of a persons sense of self that I would feel violated my own priorities and values to order them to share something with another unless they felt some sincere inner desire for their own selves. 

And I don't just mean "I want to do it to please the master"  I've been there and done that and while I did a great job and the master loved it and I wasn't harmed in any way- it was not even as nice as it is when I whore myself out because I'm simply the presentation/fuck doll to fulfill their fantasies.  Now, as someone into objectification, I can see the pleasure in that and often do enjoy being used as such- but when it's with someone I have no desire or connection with, there's no additional fulfillment of objectification either.

So, to me, it's simply not a fulfilling experience unless everyone involved truly wants it at least in part for their own selves.  When this is the case, I fully embrace it, and love it on SO many levels.  I can't really describe how awesome it is for me to see my partner with someone else- for his pleasure AND mine. 



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