RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question

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RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 9:38:18 AM

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So when many people refer to non-sexual servitude I always feel like they have a picture of a boy running around the house doing the chores, but never interacting in an intimate way with his Lady. Just someone to fetch and carry?
===
*****but THAT is ME! ALL service and nothing else!
===
and "I" have never been in a bed with a domme nor have i ever slept in Her bedroom. along with all this, i am self celebate since 2001.
the wolf

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(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 9:51:28 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
As far as your question of what a Lady gets out of keeping her malesub symbolically castrated goes; unless she's cuckolding him or prefers to live without penetrative sex with a real cock... I can't even imagine any advantages to her.

See subfever, that was exactly what I was trying to figure out with this thread. That was my original hunch but then again, I'm not every Domme and so therefore in the spirit of understanding other perspectives, I started this thread with the hopes of garnering testimonials from Dommes who practice chastity to varying degrees.

I won't say I have gotten no insight. That would be false. DustyGold was able to explain to me about her need for service subs. I see and respect her point of view. That is about the extent of the responses here that addressed the OP directly.

I guess I was expecting a lot more since if you look at the last 200 entries or so in Ask A Mistress, you have so many boys looking for medium to long term chastity and yet, very few Dommes who want to put them into this. Perhaps those Dommes are being silent. I was hoping they'd speak up and help me understand.

- LA

I think that most femdoms who are seeking an intimate relationship with a partner do not want to give up sexual intercourse as part of it -- a lot of women simply enjoy sex. It can't be replaced with oral service or manual orgasms -- she wants to have intimacy with her partner on the level of penetration sex. To enforce chastity would be denying herself as well -- for that reason I'm not into it either with my primary partner.

However, I love using orgasm control and chastity on other partners with whom I do not have a sexual relationship. For some subs, it's a HUGE thing and works wonders -- makes them feel more submissive, willing to do more things, and in a constant state of arousal and need.

Akasha

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(in reply to LadyAngelika)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 10:05:10 AM

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quote:

along with all this, i am self celebate since 2001.

I don't mean to detract from this thread, but I am curious about something (and yes, I'm somewhat ignorant on this topic...lol). Aren't there medical ramifications when guys go long periods of time without ejaculating? I was somehow under the impression that the term "blue balls" wasn't just a joke.

best regards,
curious fate

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Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

(in reply to lonewolf05)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 10:43:05 AM

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blue balls consists of like two teeny boppers heavy petting and the male gets all excited but doesnt get any sex.
for me to be celebate...there is no "excitement" involved. i just dont care anymore.

sex? bah humbug.

sorry...

the wolf

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(in reply to stormsfate)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 12:41:54 PM

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quote:

sorry...

Oh, don't apologize to me...lol. I don't care if you are celebate or not

f

Edited to add - Thanks for the explanation.

< Message edited by stormsfate -- 7/16/2005 12:42:12 PM >

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Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

(in reply to lonewolf05)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 2:29:49 PM

TiNeedsHouseboy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: stormsfate

quote:

along with all this, i am self celebate since 2001.

I don't mean to detract from this thread, but I am curious about something (and yes, I'm somewhat ignorant on this topic...lol). Aren't there medical ramifications when guys go long periods of time without ejaculating? I was somehow under the impression that the term "blue balls" wasn't just a joke.

best regards,
curious fate

You are absolutely correct. There are negative ramifications when a guy does not ejaculate regularly. People try to circumvent this by milking a sub. After reading the medical literature, IMO this is insufficient to circumvent the need to ejaculate to get full medical benefits.

For anyone who cares to challenge this notion, all I can say is: Turn off your computer. Go to your nearest MEDICAL library (part of a medical school, not the local public library). Do not use material on the web -- unless from sources like Medline to find professional/recognized/medical journals to read. Spend a day researching the topic in the medical literature. See how you feel then.

Imagine my horror when I discovered that being a medical expert doesn't necessarily have an impact on chastity kinks. I crossed cyber paths with an out-of-town subby gynecologist, who launches into endless regrets that he didn't know me while he lived in the same city where I reside. We got into a major head-batting (no pun intended) dispute. He has a passion for humiliation and chastity. His uber-fantasy is the cultivation of extended periods (months) of teasing and denial, and being locked back into his chastity belt, leading to blue balls' discomfort. Allegedly, he can't ejaculate at all unless he's undergoing an intense humiliation scene, or is fantasizing about one.

"Blue balls" are not just some teeny bopper notion, per an earlier remark. Don't be fooled by the slang term. It refers to testicular aching -- an outcome of blood filling the vessels in a male's genital area during sexual arousal. (Women can experience an analogous problem.) There's an easy to read overview here:

http://www.bettersex.com/sexdata/term.asp?termid=Blue_Balls&cookie%5Ftest=1

Getting back to the chastity loving gynecologist, aside from the fact that I don't practice humiliation, I reminded him that chastity is banned in Ti-Land. Serving me would me would necessitate that he agree to training that includes desensitization away from humiliation and producing ejaculate to please me -- frequently. Brother, did he ever have a hissy-fit! Understand that we were simply having a theoretical discussion about our differences in needs. Clearly, he's an example of a do-me sub. What I could never grasp was how he balances his kink against his medical knowledge of inherent long-term risks. IMO he must be living in denial.

Why chastity is banned in Ti-Land is a long story. Reader's Digest version: Having been born with an "organic" chastity belt, where there was no option to put it on and take it off, I will never view chastity as a game for D/s. If chastity endorsers could walk a mile in my moccasins, they'd see a whole other color spectrum, formerly invisible to the naked eye.... assuming the person isn't sexually inhibited, including having a dislike for penetrative sex.

It's one thing to voluntarily agree to let someone else have control over your naughty bits. It's a whole other matter when the notion of "voluntary" is removed from the dynamic.

BTW, for anyone reading this thread who does not like penetrative sex because it "hurts," IMO banning it from your life for that reason is not a viable option. Before you opt for that extreme "solution," go to your gynecologist and discuss the problem. It's much more likely you have a medical issue that's treatable.

~ Ti ~

(in reply to stormsfate)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 2:43:09 PM

GoddessDustyGold

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I agree with Ti. And, LA, you are right. I am not surprised you have seen this mentioned over and over in hundresd of threads. This is an amazingly huge fantasy for many boys. And they don't use very good sense about it. There are plenty of ways to amuse Me and regular masturbation under whatever parameters I decide, is not only healthy, it's fun!
I deal with a once a week scenario in most instances where chastity is involved. As far as I'm concerned, and with the information I have been able to get, that is long enough.
I also have always had My doubts that milking is sufficient. It probably is helpful, but I don't like to milk anyway. Too clinical for Me. I know Ladies who love it and make it part of very humiliating scenes. It's just not an interest of Mine. I'd rather make sure the boy has a nice, pleasurable orgasm! Just for Me! *W*

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(in reply to TiNeedsHouseboy)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 3:46:41 PM

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well "I" can take you to MY doctor and she will tell you with me standing there ....there is NO harm..........the body gets rid of any unused male "seed" out the urinary tract......
there is NO harm........
so you do as you wish to believe........i will do what MY doctor says.
and i myself could care less if i EVER have sex again........
it IS why i am celebate!!!!!!!!

the wolf......

with or without any devices...it is all the same.
males flush it out the ole drain pipe.

< Message edited by lonewolf05 -- 7/16/2005 5:12:19 PM >

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RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 4:53:18 PM

SadisticPrincess

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It's true, Wolf, there is no harm in CELIBACY, men have nocturnal emissions that take care of removing pressure and fluids. Enforced chastity is not the same at all.

(in reply to lonewolf05)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 5:10:57 PM

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a device will be no different than w/o one.
if ya aint using it........ya lose it.
either way..it gets flushed out.

there is NO difference.

wolf

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(in reply to SadisticPrincess)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/16/2005 8:08:24 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SadisticPrincess

It's true, Wolf, there is no harm in CELIBACY, men have nocturnal emissions that take care of removing pressure and fluids. Enforced chastity is not the same at all.

Dont the monks remain celiberant aswell for many years?

(in reply to SadisticPrincess)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 10:02:59 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

quote:

ORIGINAL: SadisticPrincess

It's true, Wolf, there is no harm in CELIBACY, men have nocturnal emissions that take care of removing pressure and fluids. Enforced chastity is not the same at all.

Dont the monks remain celiberant aswell for many years?

Wet dreams pretty much take care of it.

Akasha

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(in reply to imtempting)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 6:54:57 PM

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[/quote]

Wet dreams pretty much take care of it.

Akasha
[/quote]
==============
now there is a funny punchline. what is a wet dream? i havent had one of those since i was 10 years old.
thats FUNNY!~

ROFLMAO

wolf

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 8:30:28 PM

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quote:

I don't mean to detract from this thread

But you did, didn't you! Now look what you've done bad girl ;)

Seriously, there are plenty of threads on this. Let's get back to the topic at hand.

- LA

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(in reply to stormsfate)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 8:34:50 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
I'm not into it either with my primary partner.

However, I love using orgasm control and chastity on other partners with whom I do not have a sexual relationship.

Makes sense. I actually don't have intercourse with any of my subs, well except for one, but that was for purely selfish reasons - I turned that one into a stud. <weg>

I only have intercourse with my boy and other lovers that aren't into WIITWD. With other boys though, I do sometimes let them have release. Sometimes I tell them to wait 24 hours after an intense play session.

I wonder if many Dommes keep their primary partners in long term chastity...

- LA

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Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 10:13:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lonewolf05
a device will be no different than w/o one.
if ya aint using it........ya lose it.
either way..it gets flushed out.

there is NO difference.

Not necessarily. Wet dreams occur not only because of erotic thoughts and long term denial but also stimulation to the penis. Movement in bed, rubbing against the sheets, is apparently part of the trigger for wet dreams.

Chastity devices surround the penis so that rubbing the penis against the sheets doesn't occur. This lack of friction prevents the wet dream. Or so the story goes.

So build up of prostatic fluid and (possibly) Peyronie's Disease are two possible complications of long term male chastity.

(in reply to lonewolf05)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/17/2005 10:18:08 PM

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Well, at least for some men, Akasha is right.

I took control of a former pet's orgasms, and nature did indeed find a way to circumvent this.

The sub in question was in his mid-30s and, before we started playing, hadn't even been sure he was still capable of getting an erection, due to various medical issues.

R

(in reply to LadyAngelika)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/18/2005 12:43:22 AM

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read #53 bro. maybe? MOST guys,....maybe.

but not me bro. not since i was a kid and didnt know any better.
the ole man seen to that shit.
it didnt happen only once and i got my ass beat for it. didnt happen again i tell ya that lil bud.

wolf

< Message edited by lonewolf05 -- 7/18/2005 12:44:09 AM >

(in reply to onceburned)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/18/2005 12:55:21 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: onceburned
Not necessarily. Wet dreams occur not only because of erotic thoughts and long term denial but also stimulation to the penis. Movement in bed, rubbing against the sheets, is apparently part of the trigger for wet dreams.

Gee Chris, So well informed you are...
Speaking from scientific standpoint or experience?

M

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(in reply to onceburned)

RE: To cum or not to cum, that is the question - 7/18/2005 2:10:16 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
Speaking from scientific standpoint or experience? M

Oh heck, I was afraid someone would call me on that.

As far as I know, no scientific study has been done of long term wearing of a chastity device. I would think the growth of this activity would motivate researchers - purely out of medical concern and scientific objectivity, mind you. But alas, no studies. I suppose government funding would be tricky, once the media caught wind.

So my comments were based upon readings on various chastity websites. I don't know... its possible that chastity requires prostate release - <shrug> - certainly this is a widespread belief.

< Message edited by onceburned -- 7/18/2005 2:11:00 AM >

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

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