24/7 - no way!!

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

24/7 - no way!!

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> 24/7 - no way!!

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:34:27 AM

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

I've been discussing the concept of living this lifestyle 24/7 with a few people recently and the conclusion we came to (opinion only) is that it's just not possible.
Now of course this would depend on your view of what 24/7 actually is! My view would be that the dynamic and servitude is in place 24/7. For me this is just not possible. I would be absolutely exhausted mentally and physically if i were to try this.

So firstly what is your definition of 24/7?

Secondly do you think it really is possible to live the dynamics 24/7?

And if you do live this 24/7, how do you manage it?

Pretty sure this will have been done before but i couldnt find anything so apologies if im being repetitive.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:36:36 AM

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline

To me, 24/7 only would mean I lived with someone.

24/7 D/s? is only possible if both of you are independantly wealthy and have no need to have a job. Otherwise, there is always time for a break (emotional or physical)from being a D or an s.

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:40:18 AM

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

To me, 24/7 only would mean I lived with someone.

24/7 D/s? is only possible if both of you are independantly wealthy and have no need to have a job. Otherwise, there is always time for a break (emotional or physical)from being a D or an s.

thankyou.
Do you not think though that 24/7 if independent and not working would be physically and emotionally exhausting?

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to came4U)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:42:04 AM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I've been discussing the concept of living this lifestyle 24/7 with a few people recently and the conclusion we came to (opinion only) is that it's just not possible.
Now of course this would depend on your view of what 24/7 actually is! My view would be that the dynamic and servitude is in place 24/7. For me this is just not possible. I would be absolutely exhausted mentally and physically if i were to try this.

So firstly what is your definition of 24/7?

Our definition: I obey him 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.

quote:

Secondly do you think it really is possible to live the dynamics 24/7?

We manage it pretty well I think. Sometimes obeying means reminding him of other orders (ie. "I can't do laundry right now because you've ordered that schoolwork comes first").

quote:

And if you do live this 24/7, how do you manage it?

A system of tiered orders and delagating power back to me to accomplish certain tasks. Like buying groceries. I buy what I know and what I think he will like, not only what is on a list. I also get to make the decision of "If this brand is buy 1, get 1 free but the brand we usually get isn't... I'll go with the deal".

quote:

Pretty sure this will have been done before but i couldnt find anything so apologies if im being repetitive.

Hope this was helpful!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:44:26 AM

Posts: 394
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline

interesting subject...eager to see the responses

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:46:35 AM

Posts: 489
Joined: 10/3/2006
Status: offline

I believe that it is the determination of the couple or persons involved in WHAT they consider 24/7. For me, I dunno really if my life is 24/7 probably not because I must control my actions based on the rules he has laid down. I do not have someone lording over me 24/7 but my mindset is always there.

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:48:05 AM

Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline

This crops up from time to time.

For me, I'm always dominant. It's a character trait in me, like being friendly, outgoing, or a conversationalist. I'm also a musician. I'm a musician 24/7; yet I don't walk around with my guitar in hand 24/7.

For me, D/s isn't 'what I do' (that's how I define BDSM.) D/s is 'who I am.' The relationship I shared with my slave, was always M/s. We were also friends, lovers, roommates, and drinking buddies. But under all of that, she was my slave first and foremost. This, to me, is what the 24/7 relationship means.

Even someone with hundreds of millions of dollars has to make sure their slave is fed. I dont' know anyone who genuinely actively seeks to be a kept/chained slave 24/7/365 the rest of their life. Then again, maybe it's because they're chained in dungeons (laughs.)

Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to came4U)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:49:31 AM

Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline

24/7 isn't about being in collar and cuffs, naked, performing this act or another constantly. 24/7 is the dynamic of D/s, which is to say, one controls and one obeys. This includes day to day living situations. "Sir, what would you like for dinner this evening?" "Steak and salad." Girl goes about preparing dinner, in between helping with homework. Sir comes home and joins in the family life, reserving a special look for Girl now and then, a soft caress or just a grip of his hand around her wrist to communicate that the dynamic is still in place and is always in place.

_____________________________

Snarky and loving it.

Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

(in reply to murmur)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:49:37 AM

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline

quote:

Do you not think though that 24/7 if independent and not working would be physically and emotionally exhausting?

Exhausting is putting it mildly. Both parties would go insane, if not from the acts, but from sheer boredom.

(in reply to Squeakers)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:50:47 AM

arayofsunshine55

Posts: 545
Joined: 8/1/2004
From: San Francisco, CA
Status: offline

I think if you think 24/7 is him beating my ass constantly then that is narrow and who even wants to do it 24/7? My life is much more complex and rich. But he owns me always. And his say is final always, well wehn we get to it finally. Not just in the bedroom. 24/7. As with anything it really depends upon your definition and your perception of a thing. I find none of these labels or phrases are worth a damn without a lot of explanation about what a specific person means when using them.

Edited to add "the dynamic" is also different from one person to another. We are very laid back. Few to no rules or protocol. Not at all difficult to manage when we are shopping, at a restaurant, etc. the dynamic is he leads and I follow. What is so difficult to sustain about that? Plenty of people do it. My mom did it for 40 years.

< Message edited by arayofsunshine55 -- 9/3/2007 7:53:31 AM >

_____________________________

Sunshine

Is it not most transformative, most earthshaking, to pierce the veils of self-deception and illusion, and crack the eggshell of ignorance, to most intimately encounter oneself? Lama Surya Das

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:55:37 AM

Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline

24 7 one leader one fallower. one rules one obeys and they live together or married

(in reply to arayofsunshine55)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:55:55 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

My definition of 24/7 varies a bit from the general opinion. To Me, 24/7 is a state of mind, not a physical location. It means that, to My submissive, he has a mental state of My Dominance to him at all times. I am never (insert real name here) to him. I am always his Dominant. This shows in the manner he conducts himself, the way he thinks, and the things he does, whether I am with him or not. This is what I think of as mental or spiritual 24/7. It is the part of him that knows he belongs to Me, whether he is in My physical presense or not.

(in reply to Stephann)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 7:59:55 AM

Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline

24/7 for me is living with the sub that just does it for me. He's the person I want to serve me and I'm the person he wants to serve. Day to day we live life. We go to work, raise the family, watch tv, play board games, go to the grocery store, enjoy the zoo, read books...you get the idea right?

Above and beyond day to day life he knows who he is to me and I know who I am to him. He has learned my intricacies in such a way that it is second nature for him to do for me, the little things that he knows make me smile.

24/7 means, to me, that he holds a job outside this house so his days and nights are not spent working himself to the bone to ensure the house is perfect or I don't have to get my (now, in this scenario, lazy) ass off the couch. It means he contributes to the house financially (after all he lives here). He contributes to the overall care and maintenance of the house as do the other family members. His contribution is no more or less than any one else's. He does though, take care of some of the things I hate to do, such as laundry. If he excels at something, oh let's say for instance, cooking *S* then I'm going to support that as well as benefit from that.

Decisions to be made focus on the benefit of all and are not selfish.

Things like "sessions" or "scenes" or "playtime" (you pick the term for when you want time to pull out the fun stuff) happens as it happens. There are no set rules or protocol for it. If my mood is such that I want to do some rope bondage, I have him at my disposal to do such. Is he too tired because he worked at his profession all day then came home and did laundry? I take that into consideration.

I don't demand every second of every day be quite literally for me, though every second of every day is lived for us, and he knows that his service to me is pleasing me, even when his service is working the pass at a resturant all evening. (I know he is doing it for the benefit of the family)

For me 24/7 is NOT about being naked, gagged, and bound 5 days a week while the other two days are the days he cleans and buttles about. It is not about my turning into a gelatanous pile of lazy either.

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to murmur)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:04:39 AM

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

For us, 24/7 means that he can exercise his authority anytime he wants. If I am sleeping he can wake me up and tell him to go get him a glass of water. If I am at work, he can call me and tell me to go do whatever he wants me to do. It just means that there are no time constraints on when he can exercise his authority in my life.

We do not find this exhausting in any way; it is very fulfilling and energizing for us.

I don't have to think about managing it; it just is. It would harder for me to actually be part time. To have to remember when he does or does not have authority.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:05:15 AM

Posts: 85
Joined: 8/26/2007
Status: offline

My guess is that you will be (and are) getting a variety of replies based on individual's understanding of not only '24/7' but the D/s, M/s relationship as is.

To me, 24/7 is when I live with my partner and he owns me at all times. It's not the kinks that we do as we do have 'relax-no-play' days. Just me knowing and feeling that I belong to him is what keeps the relationship a 24/7 constant. Whether I'm at work, store, with my friends or family, without him - this knowledge never disappears. There is always something little to remind me, even if I'm not thinking of it directly. I don't want to take a break from that knowledge and it's not something hard to manage. People do live together in marriage afterall, they do not get exhausted (though maybe tired of it now and then).

That said, I think your question refers more to "all play / no rest" dynamic. I can assure you that even those who consider themselves 24/7 and do play a lot, take breaks. But that doesn't mean that their D/s (M/s) dynamic diminished. I can spend an entirely mundane day but in the end, I still belong to my Master with every step I take.

My 2cents.

'violet'

_____________________________

Vici, Vidi, Veni... (S)

Happy to be owned by Sir (V) (violetaelf)

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:07:15 AM

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

quote:

Do you not think though that 24/7 if independent and not working would be physically and emotionally exhausting?

Exhausting is putting it mildly. Both parties would go insane, if not from the acts, but from sheer boredom.

Maybe for you; for us it enriches our lives and allows us to fully be who we are. To know that at any moment throughout the day he can and will exercise his authority is a wonderful feeling. Not exhausting, not boring and no where near insanity.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to came4U)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:07:20 AM

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

I've been discussing the concept of living this lifestyle 24/7 with a few people recently and the conclusion we came to (opinion only) is that it's just not possible.
I so love accomplishing the "impossible". It's as close as I can get to the concept of 'perfection'.

quote:

Exhausting is putting it mildly. Both parties would go insane, if not from the acts, but from sheer boredom.

Invigorating not exhausting is putting it mildly. Its 24/7 foreplay with periodic orgasms. Boring? Only for those who view and prefer purely physical sensation. I appreciate that's all that many (most?) want/need. In that case, with a dynamic focusing on physical the body does get bored. A constantly stimulated mind is just the opposite. I'll stipulate however to us both being insane.

(in reply to missturbation)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:08:48 AM

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

My definition of 24/7 varies a bit from the general opinion. To Me, 24/7 is a state of mind, not a physical location. It means that, to My submissive, he has a mental state of My Dominance to him at all times. I am never (insert real name here) to him. I am always his Dominant. This shows in the manner he conducts himself, the way he thinks, and the things he does, whether I am with him or not. This is what I think of as mental or spiritual 24/7. It is the part of him that knows he belongs to Me, whether he is in My physical presense or not.

I really like the way you have explained this. It is very similar for us as well. It is a state of mind, not a particular physical activity or location.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:11:51 AM

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

24/7 means I am the head of the household. I have the final word. He does the menial tasks and household chores. When I'm thirsty in the middle of the night, he's the one who gets up to get me a drink. We don't have roles we step into for playtime. It isn't about kink, but about the very foundation of our relationship. He's my male wife, sans dress.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to SolarAndViolet)

RE: 24/7 - no way!! - 9/3/2007 8:14:53 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

It only seems impossible if you seperate BDSM from everyday life - when you aren't what you are and view BDSM life as seperate from vanilla life. BDSM isn't all whips and being chained to the bed. I also do not believe you have to be living together to be able to have 24/7 relationship. What about service men and women? That is like saying, '...well, you aren't really a couple/married/commited unless you live together'.

Peace
the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to missturbation)

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> 24/7 - no way!!

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.102