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Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 3:41:35 PM

DS4DUMMIES

Posts: 180
Joined: 8/7/2007
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A discussion arose today about whether or not a Dom/Master, who has had so many of his buttons pushed by his submissive/slave in a short span of time (an hour or less, in a manner designed to be mean and provoking) - should with his anger fully inflamed, take to beating his slave - or - should he wait until his temper abates. Assume he did not react initially because he read that she was trying to incite him. The anger builds and finally he explodes. We're not talking play - we're talking a genuine interest/effort on the woman's part to infuriate him, likely because she was angry with him for some reason. What then?

My own thought is that one does not strike a submissive/slave when the man's anger is nearly out of control, no matter how badly she provokes him. The possibility of losing control, for some people at least, is very great. Others say give her a beating to remember and show her who is boss? . Seems to me of she is poking at you like this, you don't really have a good relationship anyway and beating someone out of uncontrolled anger (as opposed to doing so with your head on straight) is dangerous.

Any thoughts?

Ds4

_____________________________

"When we walk to the edge of all the light we have and take the step into the darkness of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for us to stand on or we will be taught to fly.” Patrick Overton

Post #: 1

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 3:48:29 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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My thought is if an Owner does not wish to damage his (her) property, then risks of doing so should be avoided by waiting until such Owner is of sound mind before physically punishing.

And I agree, if the slave is pushing that many buttons, there are some issues to tend to.

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 2

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 3:50:58 PM

DarkDaddyZ

Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

My thought is if an Owner does not wish to damage his (her) property, then risks of doing so should be avoided by waiting until such Owner is of sound mind before physically punishing.

And I agree, if the slave is pushing that many buttons, there are some issues to tend to.

I believe that one should never punish physically when angry. Or at least use corporal punishment at that time. I have punished while angry but to defuse the situation such as enforcing cold showers over and over and things such as that.

_____________________________

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(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 3

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 3:51:42 PM

LadyLynx

Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline

If my sub/slave was trying that crap with me, then he/she doesn't need to see me for a couple of days. And I agree about not meting out punishment while angry.

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(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 4

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 3:52:41 PM

FRSguy

Posts: 653
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline

If the slave is pushing that many buttons then I would think you would have to stop and find out why or whats up. Of course the slave in that situation would probably have to be punished severly but then there is allways the chance that they want to get punished so figuring out a good punishment would probably take a while. As far as striking while angry NEVER! Way to easy to loose or not pay attention to what is going on when striking while angry.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 5

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:02:34 PM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DS4DUMMIES
Any thoughts?

Ds4

Yeah, toss the cunt out on her ass. She's clearly playing a game and well, I don't play games by other peoples rules. Why waste your time on a dumb bitch that clearly doesn't understand how the dynamic works.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 6

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:03:34 PM

Dari

Posts: 192
Joined: 10/8/2007
Status: offline

My general rule is - any pain I inflict should be by design, never by accident or thoughtlessness. Anger makes me thoughtless, or less able to judge appropriateness. I would never punish in anger. If for some reason my sub does something that requires punishment, and it pushes enough buttons that I am angry about it, then I put the sub in a place where I am not in contact with him (if that's not seeing me, or tied up and somewhere out of my way, whatever) - and punishment happens when I'm calm and rational again.

Hurting for fun is play. Hurting for punishment is teaching, and no teaching is successful when the teacher is enraged.

And when my subs come to me, my promise to them is that I will protect and care for them as long as they are mine - which includes protecting them from my anger, if necessary. If I simply can't let the anger go and punish with a clear heart, then release is the punishment they've earned.

(in reply to FRSguy)

Post #: 7

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:10:00 PM

slaveelle

Posts: 116
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: Australia
Status: offline

Striking out at a slave/submissive while in anger is a definate no-no. With that much anger consuming him he cannot be in control of his actions. From the OP it seems if the slave/submissive is going to that length to anger him then there must be something underlying, If there isnt then he should seriously start to question why she is there.

_____________________________

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(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

Post #: 8

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:10:42 PM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

As soon as the element of control is gone things have become dangerous.
As dangerous as any "vanilla" relationship that becomes violent.

It may be that she actually has lost control first...she is being abusive and goes after him until... .
He has other options besides continuing to engage in something that will put them both at risk, and needs to excercise them before things get out of control.

He needs to be able to be in control without regards to her behavior.

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 9

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:33:39 PM

junecleaver

Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DS4DUMMIES

A discussion arose today about whether or not a Dom/Master, who has had so many of his buttons pushed by his submissive/slave in a short span of time (an hour or less, in a manner designed to be mean and provoking) - should with his anger fully inflamed, take to beating his slave - or - should he wait until his temper abates. Assume he did not react initially because he read that she was trying to incite him. The anger builds and finally he explodes. We're not talking play - we're talking a genuine interest/effort on the woman's part to infuriate him, likely because she was angry with him for some reason. What then?

My own thought is that one does not strike a submissive/slave when the man's anger is nearly out of control, no matter how badly she provokes him. The possibility of losing control, for some people at least, is very great. Others say give her a beating to remember and show her who is boss? . Seems to me of she is poking at you like this, you don't really have a good relationship anyway and beating someone out of uncontrolled anger (as opposed to doing so with your head on straight) is dangerous.

Any thoughts?

Ds4

If I ever behaved that way, he would have taken care of it way before it escalated. He's said many times, he would never hit me in anger. Although, he's definitely smacked me once or twice because I was being annoying.

_____________________________

"No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy. "
--Henry A. Kissinger

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 10

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 4:51:32 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

My thoughts are that both parties would have some growin' up to do.

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(in reply to junecleaver)

Post #: 11

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:13:01 PM

kitttty

Posts: 494
Joined: 10/10/2007
Status: offline

The Master would never hit me when angry. He never said he wouldn't, but i know. iv'e made him very angry and he gave me a long scolding and then became very distant and reticent for several days. He might have hit me out of frustration once, but even then i doubt it.

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 12

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:19:51 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

quote:

ORIGINAL: DS4DUMMIES
Any thoughts?

Ds4
Yeah, toss the cunt out on her ass. She's clearly playing a game and well, I don't play games by other peoples rules. Why waste your time on a dumb bitch that clearly doesn't understand how the dynamic works.

Oddly I actually agree with MrD, if she antagonizes to that extreme when she's upset rather than communcating, punishment isn't appropriate, taking a good hard look at the relationship is.

Never hit someone in anger, that is just plain common sense.

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 10/18/2007 7:20:30 PM >

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

Post #: 13

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:20:14 PM

licia71

Posts: 19
Joined: 2/6/2007
Status: offline

*fast reply*

My Master has hit me while angry, but He never lost control.

And I agree with MrDiscipline44.

< Message edited by licia71 -- 10/18/2007 7:21:33 PM >

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 14

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:23:43 PM

sublizzie

Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline

If an "s" type is willing to make a Dominant/Master that angry, they probably have an ulterior motive. Striking them while angry and leaving any kind of mark could be used against the D/M by legal authorities. I just don't see this as a safe practice for the Dominant.

Just my thoughts........

_____________________________

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Collared June 19, 2008
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(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 15

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:24:37 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Yes, good point licia, I was going to say that it's possible to be angry without losing control. I agree that it's a bad idea to punish someone while you're ENRAGED--when you can't focus on anything except how furious you are. But sometimes the anger won't go away UNTIL you carry out the necessary punishment.

(in reply to licia71)

Post #: 16

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 7:36:18 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DS4DUMMIES

Any thoughts?

Ds4

It is my personal opinion that a person should never engage in BDSM play when they are unable to control/manage their actions REGARDLESS of the emotions they are feeling.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 17

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 8:31:12 PM

HardnRuff

Posts: 213
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline

One should Never ever raise a hand in anger ,, and if she is trying to goad you into sterness, then she is topping from the bottom and will be released if shes Mine .

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" Weapon Of Ass Destruction" † Bitch tested slut approved †

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 18

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 9:06:34 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

I don't ever beat my property when I am angry. When we are angry we act like adults and either talk about it, or go our separate ways until we cool down and can talk about it. I think a Dominant who beats their slave when angry is a asshole and abusive in my eyes. If he/she/it can't Master their temper then they have no business trying to Master another human being.

As for the sub/slave acting that way, thats a clear sign that something is WRONG and instead of beating this person senseless, it would be wiser to talk to them and sort things out. Just my opinion.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)

Post #: 19

RE: Giving beatings when the Master/Dom is extremely angry - 10/18/2007 9:36:54 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

I'm too aware of the manpulation when someone tries this with me. It makes me go cold and silent. Do it enough and I just leave. Anger has never been an issue-I have had enough suffering in life. I don't get angry these days-I forget.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 20

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