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OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:10:22 PM

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K, I met this Dom (met like we started talking on the phone), and we've been talking for almost a month. He's a lot older than me, and he started threatening to kill himself if I don't move in with him. He says he's walking to bridges and he loves me and can't live without me. I broke my leg earlier this week and I'm 20, and he wants me to get two of my friends to drive me up to his house at 2AM. I don't want him to kill himself, and I'm all confused and stuff. I really like him a lot, that's not a question, and we're really compatible, but I just don't know.

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:13:24 PM

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call him and tell him "its been nice knowing ya"

gawd....

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in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:15:01 PM

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do you think he's really serious? i do, and i'm scared.

(in reply to SeeksOnlyOne)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:15:21 PM

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What he does with his life is not your responsibility. This is emotional blackmail, something my ex husband did to me quite often. Call the police and tell them this man is threatening his life and you are concerned. Then hang up and say goodbye to him. That type of behavior is not something I would ever be compatible with. Do you really want to give yourself to someone so unstable? Think about this. Life is to be lived!

(in reply to theletter12)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:15:47 PM

stef

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Turn around and run away from him as fast as you can. If you truly think he's suicidal, call the police in his town and tell them what you've told us and let them deal with it.

~stef

< Message edited by stef -- 10/25/2007 2:16:36 PM >

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:16:10 PM

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If he has to threaten to kill himself in order to get you to see him/interact with him, he isn't worth your time. He is using guilt to coerce you. Don't fall for it. Delete and block him from your email and don't answer the phone from his number or any other you don't recognize anymore.

(in reply to theletter12)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:16:30 PM

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Change your phone number and run like hell!

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:18:13 PM

Hime

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Emotional Manipulation is no way to start a relationship. *red flag*
You (as his friend) should recommend that he seek professional help.

Oh yah, as it's been said before.....then Ruuuun!

~ xoxo

< Message edited by Hime -- 10/25/2007 2:21:06 PM >

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:18:42 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theletter12

do you think he's really serious? i do, and i'm scared.

no i dont think he is serious.....serious folks blow their brains out and let folks be surprised.....

hes a manipulative, pityful human being trying to guilt you into doing something.....

of course, this is my opinion....everyone has one

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to theletter12)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:19:39 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

Turn around and run away from him as fast as you can. If you truly think he's suicidal, call the police in his town and tell them what you've told us and let them deal with it.

~stef

Perfectly said. Does not matter of his true intention. It still is nothing but emotional blackmail and nothing but harm can come out of it for you.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to stef)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:23:05 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SeeksOnlyOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: theletter12

do you think he's really serious? i do, and i'm scared.

no i dont think he is serious.....serious folks blow their brains out and let folks be surprised.....

hes a manipulative, pityful human being trying to guilt you into doing something.....

of course, this is my opinion....everyone has one

Spot on, totally nasty piece of work in my opinion. No decent person would do that!!

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:23:50 PM

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Agreed...run, don't walk, RUN. This guy is an adult; he and he alone is responsible for the choices he makes. Using emotional blackmail to force you into a relationhip is ~not~ love. You are not remotely responsible for his mental health; if he is suicidal, yeah- he needs help to deal with that- NOT a relationship. If you truly believe he's serious and capable of hurting himself- and want to do something? You can call the authorities- let them go out and talk to him (they generally will, btw). Other than that, just accept that he's beyond your help. The only thing that can come of you going to him is you being hurt along ~with~ him (emotionally, physically, or both).

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:29:01 PM

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If he is really that twisted he may decide that you dont belong with anyone else as well and take you with him in a type of murder/suicide

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:31:05 PM

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From: Australia
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I have to agree with what has been said here. Sounds to me he isnt stable at all. In order to keep you he is making threats to end his life. Dang girl, run like hell. Block him. Cancel all contact.
You are not responsible for his actions, he is and by the sounds of it, hes lost it completely.

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:34:36 PM

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...and to be even MORE blunt than the others have. Who the hell wants a fuckin' wussy ass Dominant that does the whole: whooaaa is me act?

Get a Dominant that has some meat to him...not some pussy! jeeezzzusssss...

Nowww that i got that shit off my chest. Take the other people's advice and call the local police in his town and tell them what he told you, change your number if you have to and get the hell out of that nightmare.
I know you care about him...but do you want to start a life like this???

Good luck!!

~smilezz~

(Oh yeahh...andddd.....people who commit suicide are cowards...period!)

< Message edited by smilezz -- 10/25/2007 2:43:57 PM >

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:35:41 PM

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Rush...that is exactly what I was thinking!

You need to follow the advice of everyone here and RUN LIKE THE DICKENS!!!!! Call the local police to do a welfare check on him, chances are, they may already be familiar with him if he's a frequent flier. If you're not sure about calling the cops, try a local suicide hotline......maybe they can suggest some help...but otherwise, he's an adult, and you are NOT responsible for his life. One other thought...does he know where you live? You might want to keep an eye out for any strangers in the neighborhood. You obviously have some red flags going up...pay attention to them!

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:39:17 PM

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From: KC area Missouri
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He and he alone is responsible for the choices he makes. As others have said, he's manipulating you and trying to guilt you into giving him what he wants. That does not a relationship of any depth make. Alert authorities in his area of his claims and sever and block all contact, now and future, and go on with your life. He and his choices are not your responsibility and from what you said you've not even met face to face only by phone? He doesn't know you to love you yet. Live your life, find what fulfills you and be safe......doesn't sound like you would be safe or happy with him.

< Message edited by SweetSarijane -- 10/25/2007 2:40:18 PM >

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:43:00 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SeeksOnlyOne

call him and tell him "its been nice knowing ya"

gawd....

Sorry, but I would have to second this piece of advice.

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RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:57:03 PM

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I'd like to address this from my mom parts. He might be serious, people often believe that one who threatens, won't do it; the one's who are serious do. That is far from what actually happens. Many who threaten often times end up doing it. You might feel it is heartless to walk away from him in his need, but your coming here at twenty years old and asking for advice lets me know that you are not prepared to handle his needs and need to seek help for yourself and for your new friend. Call the people you need to call for him and you might want to give your own friends, family or confidants a call for yourself. Your wanting to help him when not able to assist him could lead you down a path of dystruction if he does act on what he threatens. He is on his way down and dragging you along with him, because you are letting him do so.

There are lots of guys out there that you could connect with... he isn't special. He is an emotionally messed up man any way you look at it. Do you want to waste your youth and life on someone who will eat your insides out? He is a danger to himself and to you. It isn't a kindness to walk his troubled path as a true friend would, it is asking for trouble! A true friend who cares would seek out professional help and would let him know you are not there as a friend unless he gets the help he needs. You might want to be a friend to him, but you need to be a friend to yourself too!

Anyone suicidal or not, that manipulates you in this manner isn't a friend and should be considered dangerous in many ways. Take the advice of most everyone here... call for help and run. If you know his family, call them. Calling for help for him is the only way you can help him... do that and then take care of you.

(in reply to SweetSarijane)

RE: OMG WTF Do I do? - 10/25/2007 2:58:00 PM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theletter12

K, I met this Dom (met like we started talking on the phone), and we've been talking for almost a month. He's a lot older than me, and he started threatening to kill himself if I don't move in with him. He says he's walking to bridges and he loves me and can't live without me. I broke my leg earlier this week and I'm 20, and he wants me to get two of my friends to drive me up to his house at 2AM. I don't want him to kill himself, and I'm all confused and stuff. I really like him a lot, that's not a question, and we're really compatible, but I just don't know.

Of course you don't want him to kill himself but try to end your confusion. He is older, you've been speaking for 4 weeks, roughly and he wants to end his life unless you move in with him? In no way imaginable are you responsible for this, nor are you equipped to deal with it.

You may very well like him but if you have any sense of self-preservation, you are NOT compatible. I can almost guarantee he'll still be alive and kicking when you say, * Sorry, no can do*. People that seriously wish to die rarely advertise the fact nor do they make bargains. It's manipulation at it's worst. Pass the problem to someone more able.

agirl

(in reply to theletter12)

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