RE: TPErs: is he crazy?

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RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:15:29 PM

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Joined: 8/28/2007
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Putting the physiology aside, because even if it was true how would the person who wasn't feeling the same feeling understand that. Or even know.

Even if he is the bad guy, how does it make things better by just leaving him?

I'm not interested in bad guys. In my opinion I don't really find anyone to be evil.

I messaged you because I was interested in what you would have to say. I'm not here to incite angry reactions from you. But your perspectives not only interest me. They're important to me. I'm educated by the insights that you have.

So if you could possibly stop being so defensive, I might be able to learn more about what you have to share. Older and wiser (hopefully) lady.

Sure it's not her responsibility to help him out. But it's not my responsibility to help a woman getting raped in an alleyway either. People would still find me despecable for not helping. But that's because the situation is "Simple" it's somethiing anyone could understand.

We're a society of people who are easily misunderstood. Why become judgemental?

(in reply to laurell3)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:23:15 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Putting the physiology aside, because even if it was true how would the person who wasn't feeling the same feeling understand that. Or even know.

Even if he is the bad guy, how does it make things better by just leaving him?

I'm not interested in bad guys. In my opinion I don't really find anyone to be evil.

I messaged you because I was interested in what you would have to say. I'm not here to incite angry reactions from you. But your perspectives not only interest me. They're important to me. I'm educated by the insights that you have.

So if you could possibly stop being so defensive, I might be able to learn more about what you have to share. Older and wiser (hopefully) lady.

Sure it's not her responsibility to help him out. But it's not my responsibility to help a woman getting raped in an alleyway either. People would still find me despecable for not helping. But that's because the situation is "Simple" it's somethiing anyone could understand.

We're a society of people who are easily misunderstood. Why become judgemental?

Not to answer for her-but *I* replied because you come across as a totally clueless twit in your profile-do you have ANY real life experience with bdsm at ALL?

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:26:21 PM

Posts: 60
Joined: 8/28/2007
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-Raises an eyebrow- Wow... Assumptions.

You two don't have any idea how I claim or keep slave or slaves at all. And quite frankly I don't believe you care about knowing.

I don't make any assumptions about your characters, about your lives. I don't assume that you'll hurt someone. You take these things and you don't attack the argument. You attack the person...

You guys don't point out that she decided to get into a sexual relationship with someone after meeting twice. Neither do you not point out that under the circumstances she did say "Yes". In a relationship where there was pain involved. Yes she could go to anyone with bruses that he left. Any submissive in a Masochistic relationship could do that, and nail their dominant/Master. Whether they were a good Master or not.

I'm not here to prove myself right or any of you wrong. I only want to see the truth. Much of the truth both you and laurell3 has said. And such truths like that I've learned. But I won't be integrating your egos with it.

-Shrugs- I wish the best for both of you. Good day.

(in reply to RRafe)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:29:01 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

-Raises an eyebrow- Wow... Assumptions.

You two don't have any idea how I claim or keep slave or slaves at all. And quite frankly I don't believe you care about knowing.

I don't make any assumptions about your characters, about your lives. I don't assume that you'll hurt someone. You take these things and you don't attack the argument. You attack the person...

You guys don't point out that she decided to get into a sexual relationship with someone after meeting twice. Neither do you not point out that under the circumstances she did say "Yes". In a relationship where there was pain involved. Yes she could go to anyone with bruses that he left. Any submissive in a Masochistic relationship could do that, and nail their dominant/Master. Whether they were a good Master or not.

I'm not here to prove myself right or any of you wrong. I only want to see the truth. Much of the truth both you and laurell3 has said. And such truths like that I've learned. But I won't be integrating your egos with it.

-Shrugs- I wish the best for both of you. Good day.

Do you, or do you not?

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:30:36 PM

Posts: 60
Joined: 8/28/2007
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You have no grounding for your arguments. I "Come across as a twit" Do you have ANY experience in BDSM at ALL?

I could say the same to you. And then you could say "Well I have this this and this experience, and I've had all this other stuff, and read these books"

Then I could say that I had "This this and this experience and read these books" but what would that really prove?

The real question is still "Why are you attacking me?"

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:32:57 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

You have no grounding for your arguments. I "Come across as a twit" Do you have ANY experience in BDSM at ALL?

I could say the same to you. And then you could say "Well I have this this and this experience, and I've had all this other stuff, and read these books"

Then I could say that I had "This this and this experience and read these books" but what would that really prove?

The real question is still "Why are you attacking me?"

Because NONE of what you have ventured jibes with the reality that those of us who DO this know. Which can only lead to the conclusion, that you do NOT.

DO you?

Or do you NOT have real life experience with a sub?

Or will you just keep dodging a simple question?

yes

no

pick ONE.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:38:25 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Putting the physiology aside, because even if it was true how would the person who wasn't feeling the same feeling understand that. Or even know.

Even if he is the bad guy, how does it make things better by just leaving him?

I'm not interested in bad guys. In my opinion I don't really find anyone to be evil.

I messaged you because I was interested in what you would have to say. I'm not here to incite angry reactions from you. But your perspectives not only interest me. They're important to me. I'm educated by the insights that you have.

So if you could possibly stop being so defensive, I might be able to learn more about what you have to share. Older and wiser (hopefully) lady.

Sure it's not her responsibility to help him out. But it's not my responsibility to help a woman getting raped in an alleyway either. People would still find me despecable for not helping. But that's because the situation is "Simple" it's somethiing anyone could understand.

We're a society of people who are easily misunderstood. Why become judgemental?

Look, you cannot put the physiology aside. You paint this profile that you want to be a Dom on a bdsm site and that you are into no limits play, yet you don't understand the simple fact that if you push someone they can become dispondent and unable to communicate, or in my case, say all kinds of crazy stuff (lol) that may or may not be true. You really need to understand the physiology, because you HAVE to learn to know what you can't know. You read them, you watch them, you talk to them and know their limits, you start out slow and learn their limits and reactions, you become aware of their emotional triggers, you are very careful to understand this can happen and at that time the person may have no ability to tell you to stop or communicate effectively. The fact that you want to be a Dom, doesn't make you one. If you don't do these things, which this guy did not, you end up hurting someone and to suggest that you can somehow just tell him when he obviously didn't want to know as she already did tell him, suggests that you don't understand the simple mechanics.

If someone doesn't adhere to the basic premise that you accept and don't break hard limits and believes that you can just pick up a flogger and be instaDom all the talking in the world ain't going to help him. What she does need to do at this point is analyze how she got into the situation and whether she needs to work on improving her radar, although anyone can be taken and people can lie. So I'm not suggesting she did anything wrong, merely that she needs to care for herself and minimize her risks, not worrying about fixing a guy that is obviously a creep.

It's fine that you don't know everything, everyone starts somewhere. I'm glad that you seem to be accepting that. There are all kinds of sites and even the search function here can give you alot of information. My "defensiveness" is alarm at the fact that someone can put on the Dom hat and get a profile and find people without a shred of understanding of wiitwd. It's really not personal.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:39:39 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

You have no grounding for your arguments. I "Come across as a twit" Do you have ANY experience in BDSM at ALL?

I could say the same to you. And then you could say "Well I have this this and this experience, and I've had all this other stuff, and read these books"

Then I could say that I had "This this and this experience and read these books" but what would that really prove?

The real question is still "Why are you attacking me?"

psst stop arguing with him and send him a message asking him to talk to you. He would be a much better source than I to get a good idea of the things you admit you don't understand and he's one of the good ones.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:41:37 PM

Posts: 60
Joined: 8/28/2007
Status: offline

Because obviously you're the "Real" ones and the rest of us are posers.

Fine... I'll tell you that I am a Master of my own teachings. I follow my own path, and I have had a meager eight slaves. Currently I have two young slaves that I hold very very dear and close to me. I deal with TPE whenever my Slaves deem they trust me. But I don't enjoy Sadism and I don't deal with complete Masochists. I don't judge them but at the same time, I'm just not the kind of Master who enjoys beating or hurting his property.

Yes, I'm younger than probably 90% of every Master here. But I'm not someone who slapped a dominant label on himself and decided that I would take advantage of girls with low self esteem.

If this makes me any less of a Master in your eyes. I'm sorry that I spoke out of place and I'll be leaving.

But I feel that it's because I can understand both my slaves and the people that they deal with that I can avoid so much strife and problems that happen in life. I would protect my slaves with my life, but I wouldn't protect them if they wronged someone else. And I seek to know the truth.

I feel that being a dominant isn't just being forceful, it's being a leader, and a protector as well. But isn't a good leader supposed to help people?

(in reply to RRafe)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:42:03 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

I'm with Laurel on this one .

It's ok to not have experience-but it's NOT ok to play like you are-and then go out and put someone at risk. You could BOTH get into serious trouble,and we are just trying to help that NOT to happen. Believe it or not, we actually care about people-including you.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to laurell3)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:44:38 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Because obviously you're the "Real" ones and the rest of us are posers.

Fine... I'll tell you that I am a Master of my own teachings. I follow my own path, and I have had a meager eight slaves. Currently I have two young slaves that I hold very very dear and close to me. I deal with TPE whenever my Slaves deem they trust me. But I don't enjoy Sadism and I don't deal with complete Masochists. I don't judge them but at the same time, I'm just not the kind of Master who enjoys beating or hurting his property.

Yes, I'm younger than probably 90% of every Master here. But I'm not someone who slapped a dominant label on himself and decided that I would take advantage of girls with low self esteem.

If this makes me any less of a Master in your eyes. I'm sorry that I spoke out of place and I'll be leaving.

But I feel that it's because I can understand both my slaves and the people that they deal with that I can avoid so much strife and problems that happen in life. I would protect my slaves with my life, but I wouldn't protect them if they wronged someone else. And I seek to know the truth.

I feel that being a dominant isn't just being forceful, it's being a leader, and a protector as well. But isn't a good leader supposed to help people?

Look, we can only judge by what we see here. Now you say that what you wrote in your profile is fake? Can you see why we would have a hard time believing someone who flip flops like that?

What IS real with you?

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:45:16 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Because obviously you're the "Real" ones and the rest of us are posers.

Fine... I'll tell you that I am a Master of my own teachings. I follow my own path, and I have had a meager eight slaves. Currently I have two young slaves that I hold very very dear and close to me. I deal with TPE whenever my Slaves deem they trust me. But I don't enjoy Sadism and I don't deal with complete Masochists. I don't judge them but at the same time, I'm just not the kind of Master who enjoys beating or hurting his property.

Yes, I'm younger than probably 90% of every Master here. But I'm not someone who slapped a dominant label on himself and decided that I would take advantage of girls with low self esteem.

If this makes me any less of a Master in your eyes. I'm sorry that I spoke out of place and I'll be leaving.

But I feel that it's because I can understand both my slaves and the people that they deal with that I can avoid so much strife and problems that happen in life. I would protect my slaves with my life, but I wouldn't protect them if they wronged someone else. And I seek to know the truth.

I feel that being a dominant isn't just being forceful, it's being a leader, and a protector as well. But isn't a good leader supposed to help people?

Read your mail please

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:51:36 PM

Posts: 60
Joined: 8/28/2007
Status: offline

Check yer mail.

(in reply to laurell3)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 7:54:18 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Try again, nothing there, CM is bad like that sometimes.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 10:24:19 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Check yer mail.

After we talked for a while, I realized that I had gotten a mistaken impression of you . I apologize for trying to see you incorrectly-I hope you and your girls do well together.

The net can suck for clarity sometimes, and I look forward to seeing you around the forums in the future.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to zhouwuatsien)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 10:25:47 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien

Check yer mail.

After we talked for a while, I realized that I had gotten a mistaken impression of you . I apologize for trying to see you incorrectly-I hope you and your girls do well together.

The net can suck for clarity sometimes, and I look forward to seeing you around the forums in the future.

Ditto and thanks for talking with us.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to RRafe)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/22/2007 10:28:18 PM

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Joined: 8/28/2007
Status: offline

I realize that the guy in OP did do something wrong... He agreed to a hard limit and then took it back by force. I have some more to learn about limits as it is.

I can be too idealistic sometimes.

(in reply to RRafe)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/23/2007 11:06:54 AM

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Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline

I am one who sometimes does jump into TPE quickly if things seem to clique right.

I'm also one of those who enjoys pushing the boundaries and comfort and limits of a slave.

But I don't like the sound of this story at all. It doesn't sound like either of those hings is what was going on, but rather that he was out of control or had his own fantasy going in his head and just wasn't willingly to look outside that at what was really going on.

In either case: No, this isn't a regular difference in TPE. TPE can and often does involve some pretty hard/extreme moments as the "total" is being felt out and expanded and reinforced, but this just sounds like someone unstable or unrealistic, to me.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to wtfcrazy)

RE: TPErs: is he crazy? - 11/24/2007 1:31:21 AM

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Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline

No, this is not normal nor sane TPEer behavior... while this dude may in fact be the hardcore TPE'r he claims to be. What he did is not a good way to go about it.

Ask yourself, how sane is it for two people that just met and have known each other for two weeks to get Married and you'll have your answer.

(in reply to wtfcrazy)

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