RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (Full Version)

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octavia -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:03:52 AM)

Yes, Chelle...
But my point is that we could use a section on this board dedicated to those discussions.  Not to minimize your post at all, but the issues I want to bring up are much different and much the same depending.  Some of us who have a commonality in our approach to bdsm could use a place that was dedicated to the spiritual side of things.  Just look at this thread, just because it has been brought up, several people have brought their individual and seperate issues up in an attempt to express and talk about them.  I didn't even bring up my specific thoughts, questions, struggles yet,  simply the thought that we need a place dedicated to spirituality.  I think it would enable us to better converse about such things.  I am going to click around and send a note to a mod or two and see if I can find a way to suggest it.

Thanks all! [:)]
octavia




Dnomyar -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:06:45 AM)

IMHO if you put up a religious board  it would be a constant flaming session with the anti religious side.




CreativeDominant -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:15:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

IMHO if you put up a religious board  it would be a constant flaming session with the anti religious side.


Valid point, Dnomyar.  Do you suppose though that it would go on any longer or any more frequently than the flaming that may/may not occur on the Gorean boards?  Or on the poly boards?  (I don't know as I don't go to those forums).  Even amongst those that identify as Christian, other than that basic shared belief...you believe in Christ, I believe in Christ...there can be wide variances so it is just as likely that there may be flaming going on between those who share that same belief.  If the mods were to have the same rules regarding those boards as they do here, with a willingness to shut down threads that become too fiery, it just might work.





chellekitty -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:16:43 AM)

we could use a section of the board dedicated to numerous things...can we also have one just for the topics that are brought up all the time "what is the difference between a submissive and a slave" "music in a scene" etc...oh wait "religion and spirituality in BDSM" could fit in there too...

if you feel that strongly about the need for another forum just for spirituality and BDSM, create a yahoo group or something like that and let people know it is out there, they are free and really easy to set up...my point is...why change what already works? and give the mods more work, they do their job on a volunteer basis...

chelle




RCdc -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:19:15 AM)

I dislike the idea.
 
the.dark.




LaTigresse -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:26:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

IMHO if you put up a religious board  it would be a constant flaming session with the anti religious side.


Not to mention, everyone has a different idea of spirituality and unfortunately there is just as much, if not more, one-true-wayism, within the topic.

Example: I despise Catholicism and most other christian based faiths. However, I don't deny anyone else their right to follow said faiths. It's just that my spirituality is quite different because I see too much hypocrisy within christianity. Someone is going to take offense to that because it challenges the very core of who they are.

To create a forum for spirituality will ultimately end up with nothing but arguments of what the real true, faiths are. Mine is better, more true, than yours. And instead of quoting the latest bit of CNN or BBC news, it will be quotes from the bible. Which some of us also feel has no real value. Something else that will upset people but it shouldn't.

It would be lovely if it were, a live and let live, mindset when this topic comes up but, unfortunately, the very nature of religioun is a, mine is better than yours, subject. Always has been and always will be, wars fought, people persecuted.

I wouldn't expect a forum for spirituality any time soon..........




octavia -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:27:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

we could use a section of the board dedicated to numerous things...can we also have one just for the topics that are brought up all the time "what is the difference between a submissive and a slave" "music in a scene" etc...oh wait "religion and spirituality in BDSM" could fit in there too...

if you feel that strongly about the need for another forum just for spirituality and BDSM, create a yahoo group or something like that and let people know it is out there, they are free and really easy to set up...my point is...why change what already works? and give the mods more work, they do their job on a volunteer basis...

chelle



It may indeed create LESS work for the mods, as it would by definition organize things more.   Also, I think your idea for a "greatest hits" section or a FAQ, would be brilliant!  It could be in the section dedicated to newcomers that we already have... I have not been here long enouph to know the history of CM, but my guess would be that boards have been added in the past, just because something works does not mean that people should cease thinking of ways to improve it.
just my humble opinion as always,
oct




octavia -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:35:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

IMHO if you put up a religious board  it would be a constant flaming session with the anti religious side.


Not to mention, everyone has a different idea of spirituality and unfortunately there is just as much, if not more, one-true-wayism, within the topic.
Sounds a lot like the way people talk about bdsm.
Example: I despise Catholicism and most other christian based faiths. However, I don't deny anyone else their right to follow said faiths. It's just that my spirituality is quite different because I see too much hypocrisy within christianity. Someone is going to take offense to that because it challenges the very core of who they are.   And I despise poly, does not mean that those people who practice it should not have a place to discuss it.

To create a forum for spirituality will ultimately end up with nothing but arguments of what the real true, faiths are. Mine is better, more true, than yours. And instead of quoting the latest bit of CNN or BBC news, it will be quotes from the bible. Which some of us also feel has no real value. Something else that will upset people but it shouldn't.  Sounds a bit like what happens when someone brings up what a "real" slave is.

It would be lovely if it were, a live and let live, mindset when this topic comes up but, unfortunately, the very nature of religioun is a, mine is better than yours, subject. Always has been and always will be, wars fought, people persecuted.  Again, I really don't see any difference to anything you have pointed out here and any other topic that seems to come up over and over and over again on these boards.  We are a controversial group by nature, and wouldn't it be nice if there was a whole section of the board that those people who want to chat about it can, and those that don't could avoid.

I wouldn't expect a forum for spirituality any time soon..........



Just my humble opinion,
oct




chellekitty -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:36:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: octavia

It may indeed create LESS work for the mods, as it would by definition organize things more.   Also, I think your idea for a "greatest hits" section or a FAQ, would be brilliant!  It could be in the section dedicated to newcomers that we already have... I have not been here long enouph to know the history of CM, but my guess would be that boards have been added in the past, just because something works does not mean that people should cease thinking of ways to improve it.
just my humble opinion as always,
oct


you are arguing because you want something, and refusing to see all the other people saying "it just won't do any good"...my one last response on this topic....

it just would not do any good

if you want to talk about spirituality and/or religion, i am all for it...talking about fixing what is not broke because you want it to be different is pointless, amongst other things...there have been demands for new boards for as long as i have been posting and it has never happened...they are not going to do it...




LaTigresse -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:41:21 AM)

And of course you are as entitled to your opinion as I am to mine.

I am just voicing reasons as to why I believe the forum will not be created.




octavia -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 7:42:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty



you are arguing because you want something, and refusing to see all the other people saying "it just won't do any good"...my one last response on this topic.... If I were "refusing to see" your point of view I would not have responded to you.  I simply disagree with you..  I have that option.  Your reply to me, I heard as " I don't agree with you, so why don't you take your ideas and go somewhere else."

it just would not do any good

if you want to talk about spirituality and/or religion, i am all for it...talking about fixing what is not broke because you want it to be different is pointless, amongst other things...there have been demands for new boards for as long as i have been posting and it has never happened...they are not going to do it...
You never know until you ask.. I posted this to ask others opinions, I have gotten them.  BTW, I think it would be good to notice that I am not the lone ranger here.  There are people who disagree with my point, and those that agree... All is well on good ol' CM, i'd say. [:D]





chellekitty -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 8:01:21 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: octavia

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

you are arguing because you want something, and refusing to see all the other people saying "it just won't do any good"...my one last response on this topic....


If I were "refusing to see" your point of view I would not have responded to you.  I simply disagree with you..  I have that option.  Your reply to me, I heard as " I don't agree with you, so why don't you take your ideas and go somewhere else."
<snip>



at the time i wrote that, you had not responded to any other persons post, my appologies...and i said "what all the other people are saying" not "my point of view"...please read what i said, not what you think i am saying...

edited for formatting




RCdc -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 8:19:21 AM)

What I would like to know is why people insist on trying to seperate mostly everything into neat little boxes.
 
Now Gor having it's own section I can kind of understand as a few Goreans I know, do see themselves on a different place to BDSM.
 
Poly, meh - I strain to see why a seperate section.
 
As for the others, they may be sepetate, but they are hardly known for sticking to the 'rules' and everyone answers regardless.
 
I am deeply spiritual.  I could even be called religious.  But creating more them and us scenarios?  I find the thought quite tasteless.  It will only get to a point where people want a 'christian' section - and then a 'Pagan' section... the list just goes on and on...
 
the.dark.




SlaveSubtoserve -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 8:38:22 AM)

....i also wrestle with how to best integrate this lifestyle with my spiritual/religious beliefs -- it is a struggle though i do think certain perspectives are helpful once on thinks it through a bit....




Celeste43 -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 9:48:39 AM)

B.com has a philosophy and religion forum, but it gets rather heated. Not as badly as politics though.

However I think that a post in General BDSM is the appropriate place as long as it is carefully written and titled.




nenarien -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 10:55:59 AM)




Have you ever seen the movie Secretary with Maggie Gyllenhal and James Spader? There is a scene in it where she is on a hunger strike to prove her love to her dom. Her family and friends are all visiting her. At one point a priest visits her. He informs her that masichism shows up all through Christianity as a way to show your love, from self flaggulating priests to Christ himself allowing himself to be crusified.






octavia -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 10:56:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

B.com has a philosophy and religion forum, but it gets rather heated. Not as badly as politics though.

However I think that a post in General BDSM is the appropriate place as long as it is carefully written and titled.


The only problem I have with that is a post in the general section invites by it's placement a general response.  I don't want everyone opinions on my struggles on these issues.  For example, where I in a poly relationship I would be posting looking for others in a poly relationship, rather than everyones opinions of poly.  With these specific issues, I'm not looking for everyones differing views, only for the views of those people who subscribe to the same beliefs. 
[:)]
I'm getting the feeling that this is not a place that I can find that sort of support,
am I wrong?




applecandy -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 5:14:00 PM)

I actually don't mind the idea of setting up a separate forum for this kind of thing. As has been stated multiple times in this thread, there is a penchant for heated debates, flaming, and people with no actual opinions posting to be funny. For something as personal as this can be, perhaps a separate forum would be appropriate.

Must ponder...




AquaticSub -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 5:29:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: octavia

The only problem I have with that is a post in the general section invites by it's placement a general response.  I don't want everyone opinions on my struggles on these issues.  For example, where I in a poly relationship I would be posting looking for others in a poly relationship, rather than everyones opinions of poly.  With these specific issues, I'm not looking for everyones differing views, only for the views of those people who subscribe to the same beliefs. 


Makes sense to me.

A lot of threads asking about BDSM and religion/spirituality and people's struggles with merging the two have turned into a huge flame-fest about how religion/faith sucks and everyone who is religious/spiritual is an idiot. It would be nice to have a place to discuss religion and how it relates to BDSM with other religious/spiritual people but I don't think CM is the place for it.

The main reason is that the CM mods are volunteers who only want to spend a certain amount of time being mods. Adding a new section on such a volatile subject would create a great deal more work for them. I tried to start a more general group on sex and religion on another site I'm on but it pretty much died. I have found one site for Christian BDSMers but I'm afraid they were far too conservative for me to get along there.

My suggestion would be to try and start your own site, group or forums or find one that someone else made and revive it.




Celeste43 -> RE: blending beliefs ... how do i find others dealing with same issues (11/6/2007 5:40:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: octavia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

B.com has a philosophy and religion forum, but it gets rather heated. Not as badly as politics though.

However I think that a post in General BDSM is the appropriate place as long as it is carefully written and titled.


The only problem I have with that is a post in the general section invites by it's placement a general response.  I don't want everyone opinions on my struggles on these issues.  For example, where I in a poly relationship I would be posting looking for others in a poly relationship, rather than everyones opinions of poly.  With these specific issues, I'm not looking for everyones differing views, only for the views of those people who subscribe to the same beliefs. 
[:)]
I'm getting the feeling that this is not a place that I can find that sort of support,
am I wrong?


You've forgotten the fact that no matter what the title of the board is, anyone can (and will) post to it. NonGoreans post there. Monogamous types have commented on things in the poly forum. Subs frequently answer in Ask a Master, and tops frequently answer in the Submissive forum.

So even if CMe put up a new forum titled Spirituality, you would still get people who didn't share your beliefs and who would comment in order to debunk yours and promote theirs.

The only way around this is to establish a private group with friends you already know are interested in this.




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